Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU or GP should at least acknowledge videos of grandchild

155 replies

mintandcoral · 17/06/2020 09:29

This might sound petty but I do feel like things that wouldn't necessarily have bothered me much before are getting to me a bit now we've been in lockdown for so long- so prepared to be told IABU.

Since lockdown started I was aware that grandparents on both sides would miss our 1 year old very much. Families on both sides live several hours drive away so we have been unable to see any of them since March. We usually see them at least once a month.

I already sent them the ocassional video but during lockdown I have started consistently sending videos to them of ds. I send them over watsapp to my mum, dad and MIL. FIL doesn't have a phone.

MIL repeatedly doesn't acknowledge that I have sent her these videos, which are only ever a couple of minutes long. I see the double blue ticks so I know that she has received them and watched them but nothing. I think it got to 10 videos, over the course of a couple of weeks once and she had said nothing.

In contrast my own parents who love the videos, comment on each one - even just to say 'wow he has grown' or 'his vocabulary is really coming along' or whatever stock gp phrase. I'm also in a group with my family where my sister shares videos of my cousins with her pil and parents and again, everyone generally will make a comment every now and then.

I'm not expecting poetry, I just find it odd having radio silence for sometimes weeks on end. When dh rings them says she misses him and wants to facetime with him. Do you think she just doesn't like me very much? There is a history of her sulking in the past and she can be extremely passive aggressive. I find this passive aggressive or am I over reacting and this is a normal response? I sent a ridiculous cute video last night and I just think how can you not even comment?!

IABU- totally normal gp doesn't acknowledge video
IANBU- behaviour is a bit weird

OP posts:
mintandcoral · 17/06/2020 22:34

He is her ONLY grandchild though, she's not exactly being inundated! @FlapAttack23 and the animated potato has started saying things and making noises!

Its not a group though @Immigrantsong - it's an individual chat just me and her. I said earlier, this is why it feels awkward when she doesn't acknowledge anything. I don't think I'd be bothered if it was a group chat.

@Haffdonga @Yesterdayforgotten I think I will tell myself this as I don't want to feel animosity towards her... but then she is rather like your mil sounds @IdratherbeinCornwall.

I will just be sure from now on to keep my expectations of her in check and not 'inundate' her with potato updates...!

OP posts:
mintandcoral · 17/06/2020 22:36

This is hands down the best suggestion so far @livefornaps Grin

OP posts:
Mermaidlagoon · 18/06/2020 16:57

Does seem a bit odd but maybe she just doesn't understand it's rude and could be watching them and talking to her husband about how cute he is. My mum always seems really unenthusiastic over WhatsApp, we'll make plans and she's always just like can do, can do, ok, ok.... Or I'll tell her something and she's like Ok. I sometimes wonder if she's even that bothered and then I'll see her in person and she's all yippee! Excited and enthusiastic seeming about these same things so I just don't think she's very good at conveying emotions over WhatsApp. Just a thought it could be a similar thing

Embracelife · 18/06/2020 17:02

O you really sit watching two minutes of your relatives? Couple of minutes of child doing not very much is boring.espec if repeated 10 x a week!
Make it shorter 20 to 30 secs max. Enough to see smiley happy child.
But let dh send or not

sunflowersandtulips50 · 18/06/2020 17:10

Stop sending her pics and videos. She doesnt have a close relationship with her own DS so why would that be different with you. I blocked my MIL on whats app as I couldnt be arsed, she never responded to any messages and would speak only to my OH. Never acknowledged anything I ever sent about the DC ever. Suited me fine....Funny thing is she is superficially nice when i see her in person

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread