Breastfeeding in public

[Forgivenandsetfree]

Inspired by a comment I have seen on Facebook.
I breastfed until 22 months, towards the end I didn't feed in public because of course she was eating by then but when she was small I did. Luckily I never had an issue and was treated well in my local Macdonalds and Costa, but the comment said most people have issues with Bf in public, aibu to think this isn't true?
YABU- I faced issues/I don't like it.
YNBU- I don't/ didn't have a problem.

[FannyFernackerpan]

Fed both mine - one for 17 months and the other for 22 months.

I did it everywhere, cafes, restaurants, on the train, beach, at a wedding, no problems ever because I was discreet. Most of the time no-one even noticed I was doing it. I'd wear a baggy top, use the table as a shield, or turn away slightly. I never made a big deal out of it and it was never an issue.

I've got no patience with these earth mother types who defiantly flop their tits out at every given opportunity and almost dare people to challenge them.

It is perfectly possible to breast feed in public without making a song and dance about it and many of us have done it.

[grumpytoddler1]

I don't think anyone has ever really noticed or cared. I think someone might have been whispering about me when I was feeding DS on a flight when he was about 14 months, but they didn't say anything to me.

I didn't like feeding him in public after about 15 or 16 months, but I rarely needed to anyway. By that age if he was tired I could often put him in the pram or the car and if he was thirsty or hungry I could give him a drink or a snack.

[Vivi0]

I’m still feeding my DS who is 3.

I’ve always fed in public and never had a negative comment or sideways glance.

Apart from the occasional positive comment, no one really seems to care.

[TheFormerPorpentinaScamander]

I think the only public place I never fed mine was the bus. And that was more because I was worried I'd have to try and get off with a baby attached to my boob while wrestling a pushchair etc.

The only negative comments I can remember receiving were from my Auntie and my Nannie. We were out shopping and went for lunch. While eating my lunch I discreetly fed baby ds. Auntie and Nannie commented that it was unnecessarily and disgusting . Apparently he should have waited until we got home to be fed. I pointed out that we had stopped for food and a drink. DS also needed food and a drink. But as he was only a couple of months old that came in the form of breastmilk. I'd like to say it shut them up, but they still comment on how disgustingly long I breastfed for (ds1 was 20 months. Ds2 was 3 years. They are now 15 and 13 so you'd think Auntie and Nannie would have moved on!)

I think my favourite 'breastfeeding in public' memory was when ds1 was a baby. Again, out shopping. This time with cousin and her DD (4). We nipped into a little cafe as ds needed a feed and we figured cake and coffee wouldn't be a bad idea. The seats in this cafe went all along one side and then round the back making a big L shape. It's mainly frequented by older ladies. We found a table along the back so my pushchair wasn't in anyones way, and no one would be able to see me feeding. Settled down to feed, hoping not to offend anyone. Cousins DD very loudly piped up "are you feeding baby name?" I replied yes he's having milk". "From your booby?" She says sounding amazed. "My Mummy has boobies. She has 2. She likes them" So much for not interrupting the ladies lunches

[Thehop]

I fed all mine and got lots of lovely positive comments.

Still feeding my 3 year old, and keep that at home for bedtime 😂

[GladAllOver]

But I think those who don't like it dont say anything in public
Neither should they. None of their fucking business how a mother feeds her child.

[FleurDaxeny]

I am not a twat, so I never made a big deal about it or breastfed any of mine in inappropriate places so never had the slightest problem.

Then you read about a woman breastfeeding in the middle of a swimming pool, or in the middle of a sports shop, and complaining about the reaction they get . There's usually a very good reason why SOME women encounter negative reactions, they looked for one. Most of us have always been absolutely fine.

[TinyPigeon]

I don't care and still do it but I've definitely noticed a change in response now DS is older.

One woman memorably went "eugh" at me IN BABY GROUP. My son was only just one at the time!

[FleurDaxeny]

I had the opposite, well DH had. He received a few negative reactions in baby clinic and baby groups because one or 2 women were irate that a man dared entering a place where they had decided to breastfeed (fair enough) but also decided it would be a woman-only place .

And you wonder why some men are not so involved when they can't go and check the weight or their baby or take them to a class without such negative reactions. It's their baby too!

[funinthesun19]

Luckily I’ve never had any negative comments. But I know they do happen and it makes me really angry to know some woman have had to put up with dickheads who have nothing better to do than moan about a baby having their food.
My DD is 20 months now and we’re heading towards the end of the breastfeeding journey now (). I’ve really enjoyed it.

[funinthesun19]

*women

[Mama05]

I breastfed too but I was too scared to do it in public for fear of someone bombarding me with abusive comments or trying to take pictures of me.

I know it’s a bit far fetched to think someone would film me but you never know in this day and age. And I’d find it intimidating and I’d feel vulnerable if it were to happen and I was on my own with my son.

I once breastfed in the back seat of my car but made sure the window were covered with a jacket so I had some degree of privacy.

[TinyPigeon]

Really I think the focus on "discrete" breastfeeding probably damages breastfeeding rates. It's not a shameful secret, and I think it's much harder to establish feeding if you're also busy worrying if you're hidden away enough. We should be encouraging women to defiantly flop their tits out as you've so delicately put it @FannyFernackerpan. To normalise breastfeeding we need to increase breastfeeding visibility and we won't do that if we're huddled under tables like public mastabators.

[Wolfgirrl]

@Rubyupbeat I agree with you. A 3 or 4 year old doesnt need to be breastfed in public for any reason, I do believe there is a bit of exhibitionism about it. I think some people want a negative comment so they can have a self righteous moan.

Up until 1 milk is needed, so I would say bfing on demand anywhere is fine up until around that point. After that water is a perfectly sufficient drink and a baby is fully weaned onto solids.

[TheFormerPorpentinaScamander]

@TinyPigeon

Really I think the focus on "discrete" breastfeeding probably damages breastfeeding rates. It's not a shameful secret, and I think it's much harder to establish feeding if you're also busy worrying if you're hidden away enough. We should be encouraging women to defiantly flop their tits out as you've so delicately put it *@FannyFernackerpan*. To normalise breastfeeding we need to increase breastfeeding visibility and we won't do that if we're huddled under tables like public mastabators.

I absolutely agree with this. When I had ds1 i was only 19 and didnt have the confidence to flop my tits out, although would discreetly feed wherever he needed it. I was less concerned with ds2. If I have another baby I'm going to make a hat that looks like a boob for baby to wear when feeding

[Mammyloveswine]

Never had any issues! Fed both of mine for 18 months, can't remember the last time I fed in public, might have been at butlins by the pool with DS2 around 15 months.

[onlinelinda]

Oh, get on with it and sod em. I hope things have moved on since the days when I had to endure being masturbated at in a park, and told off by a train conductor/ticket collector, for breastfeeding. But not enough.

[Asiama]

No negative comments in public, some positive ones actually including people offering me a drink, checking I was comfortable and generally being encouraging. The only negative comments were from my own mother who didn't like me breastfeeding even in my own home

[Pipandmum]

I breastfed in public all the time. Restaurants, airports, etc. Never made a fuss, was discreet but didnt bother covering up with a big muslin or similar - I didn't have anything on display but if you looked it was obvious what I was doing.
I have one lively memory of quite an elderly gent coming up to me in a cafe and saying that when his children were babies it wasn't so acceptable but he was so happy to see me breastfeed and feel comfortable doing so.

[B0bbin]

Had some cafe/ shop staff offer drinks of water (for me) when I was BF my DS, even when he was over 2. Everyone was fine with it I think! I sometimes felt a bit funny about it if I felt someone was having a good look, but mostly felt fine.

[Wolfgirrl]

Coke doesnt come out of boobs though does it?

Well good for them, I myself feel it is exhibitionist and unnecessary.

[FleurDaxeny]

We should be encouraging women to defiantly flop their tits out

it's that ridiculous attitude that puts mothers off, and gives all of us a bad name.

There's no need to flop anything out, there's no need to make mothers uncomfortable.

You want to encourage breastfeeding? Do something about the attitude and funding to support new mothers from the minute they give birth.