To feel like we are just existing now

[Ghostlyglow]

In a miserable, joyless world of queues and masks. A couple of friends have lost their jobs this week. Where are we going with this?When will it end?

@pigeon999 I fear that will never happen.

@pigeon999

taliya The countryside is that way >>>>>

Anyway back to the thread, for those that are feeling absolutely awful. I feel for you. It is crap, no point to dress it up, far better to be honest and get it all off your chest with a hefty glass of later.

We will make it through this because we have to, not because it has been so great and positive. I am glad I have a life to miss, and one day when we are swimming happily with our babies/watching films munching popcorn/singing along at a concert/enjoying cocktails with a bar full of people we will talk of these lockdown days often I am sure.

I'll drink to that

The things that would relieve the lockdown fatigue are the things that we can't do and probably won't for some time.

The substitutes aren't working anymore.

Denying feelings is more harmful than acknowledging them.
Just because someone is venting and letting off steam, it doesn't mean that they aren't appreciating what they have. It's a healthy acknowledgement of feelings until they are in a position to reset.

Far healthier than being smug and goady getting off on moralising over somebody who is struggling more than you.

Pigeon999
🙄 "we will make it through this because we have to'...'I'm glad I have a life to miss'

Melodramatics again...

You have to appreciate the small things in life.

I think most of us do.

Doesn't take away from the fact that life is difficult for a lot of people right now.

It certainly doesn't help my husband who has a mental health illness and possible ASD, when the things that really keep him well are no longer in place. I guess he should appreciate the small things in life (which he actually does more than anyone I know). If only he changed his mindset....

Do you know what does help? Having space to talk about how you are feeling, without people trying to heap guilt on you because there are people around the world who have it harder.

No one is asking you to try to fix their problems, or make it better for them. No one is asking for your advice. Just let people talk, and if you think that it is wallowing in self-pity you don't have to read it. You most certainly don't need to try and fix it by offering trite sound bites.

I'm very aware that lockdown has made life very difficult for lots of people for different reasons and I'm not minimising that, but personally I feel I'm 'living' more now - and my old life where I continually raced from commitment to commitment was a less enjoyable life. I have found slowing down an immense relief. More time to read, exercise, sleep, engage with nature, lots of long walks and bike rides exploring and finding new places - I can't lie - I prefer it.

It's no good for my kids who need to be at school and seeing their friends - and it's been awful to see a good friend struggling with a nasty and prolonged case of covid - so for the sake of everyone else I'll be glad to see the end of the pandemic but on a purely personal level I don't think I've ever been more content. My challenge is to work out how to retain elements of this slower life when things eventually get back to normal. Maybe I'm just ripe for retirement but sadly I need to work for another 20 years for that!

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I am completely fed up of preparing 3 meals a day 5 or 6 days a week. I'm fed up of washing up and washing clothes and cleaning toilets and changing nappies and trying to be a peacekeeper.

what does this have to do with the pandemic? Maybe you were extremely privileged and are used to have a nanny, cleaners and housekeepers, but otherwise that's just life. People also tend to eat 7 days a week, are you making your kids fast on the last day?

and when you are a working parent, you do all that, on top of your job. Strictly nothing to do with current events

Yup. My anxiety and depression are at their worst in years. I just want normal and manageable back.

Melodramatics again...

I know right? If you didn't know the situation, you would picture people locked in a cave for the last 5 years with no end in sight.

A couple of months at home, coming to an end right now, and still people tantrum about missing life, loss of childhood and so on... It's quite funny but I think some actually managed to convinced themselves! Boredom does that to people. It's even more funny when you know that most (not all) didn't have such a fascinating and extraordinary life anyway

It’s ok to say this is not your experience. Peoples situations and how they process that are different.
However, what’s not ok is when people on here start labelling feeling down or depressed as ‘melodramatic’ .
I worked in mental health in suicide prevention for years ... worked with people who had the same label.
Maybe this trolling and pulling apart others right to feel low should look inside themselves a little more. What are you getting out of pulling apart people who are feeling low? I don’t reckon things are quite as peachy for you as you make out.

I don’t reckon things are quite as peachy for you as you make out.
of course they are not. We had to cancel our holidays, and it looks like our main summer holiday will have to be pretty much cancelled too and at best we are stuck with taking it in Europe.

I didn't like to be stuck at home, no one does, but at least took the kids out for a few hours every day when that's the only thing that was allowed in the guideline.

Should we encourage people who describe the situation as something out of a dystopian horror movie, when it's been nothing of the sort? How is that remotely helpful? FFS, 2 or 3 months mainly at home, is that really worth so much drama? Does it help anyone to push them to be even more miserable?

I always find it funny how people bleat on about mental health awareness and being kind, then take the first opportunity to minimise a person's feelings and override their experien.

Just because it hasn't had a profound impact on your mental health and outlook doesn't mean that is the same for everyone.

For some it may feel like nothing has changed. Or that it's a temporary thing that can be managed. For others it is a dystopian hell where routines are thrown in the air, access to support systems are restricted and life is irrevocably changed.

It's not fair to belittle that, nor empathetic ally consider the impact that has on the way a person feels/responds.

thegreatbritish yes it does help to get stuff of your chest. Especially if you’re having to keep it all together at home. Yes it does.
Why does that bother you?

Some may feel that way and who are you to say otherwise. You aren’t in their shoes, you don’t know what they are going through.

@TheGreatBritishLockdown

Yes been existing for weeks.
Our jobs have never been busier and harder and there's a strong chance we'll loose them later in the year so you are killing yourself and for what?!
I am worried sick about the kids education and in all of this feel this has been the most shambolic thing - so we can build a new hospital in 2 weeks but we can't sort online lessons or renting space in other public buildings to allow distancing?
I am terrified of where/when it will end - as in there is no end in sight.
I want to book things to look forward to but I am fed up of how many deposits I have all
Over the place with no sign of things happening and the prospect of no job.
I have been to my mums house and a friends garden but I am worried by how relaxed things seem to be getting with some people. At the same time I can understand people don't perceive a risk because the rate is falling.
It's hard and I don't know what the answer is but it's bloody miserable.

Should we encourage people who describe the situation as something out of a dystopian horror movie, when it's been nothing of the sort

Well let me think.

I've been made redundant, haven't hugged my DD since January...oh and what was the other thing?? Oh yes I remember, the small matter of my Mum dying, not being able to say goodbye and not being able to carry out her final wishes, so she's currently in a small wooden box at home with my dad where she will stay for who knows how long.

So yeah life is a bit of a horror movie but I'll do my best to not to wallow in misery because, you know at least the birds are singing and I get to bake cakes.

Is anyone else dreading the start of a new week

@Alex50

It’s madness just looking at Covid deaths. The media have a lot to answer for, for scaring the shit out of people. I know parents that locked their children away for 12 weeks, even though the family were young and not shieding, they thought if they went outside they would die. Society breaking down will be 100 times worse that the virus.

So who do you blame for that kind of stupidity?

Nah I’m excited to see what next week brings, with most of the high street reopening things will start to feel a bit more normal & less restricted

@TheGreatBritishLockdown I'm a restaurant manager, I don't have time to eat breakfast or lunch on normal working days, and don't have to cook dinner for myself whilst in work. Nor do I have to cook for my children who are in nursery or with grandparents 3 days a week. And on the other two days my husband cooks because it's not the 50s and he's better at it than me. I would usually visit parents, friends and grandparents for dinner/lunch several times a week. Is it so difficult to understand that things have drastically changed for a lot of people? Life has become monotonous and shit to be perfectly honest. It's great that others can see the positives but unfortunately I'm a pessimist.

Being at home for 160 hours a week with potty training children makes a lot more mess than being at home for the less than 100 I was probably home before. Logic.

I never understood these people who only had children because they could avoid them, dump them on other people and being involved as much as possible. Why bother in the first place?

And I am a working mum.

I never understood these people who only had children because they could avoid them, dump them on other people and being involved as much as possible. Why bother in the first place?

I never realised until this how many parents don’t really want their children to have freedom or time outside the family until now.