About PIL food hygiene?

[Billyjoearmstrong]

Another argument with Dh regarding his parents and food hygiene.

They basically don’t have any.

MIL will cook huge pots of food to last five days - chicken stews, pasta sauce with meat etc and leave them on the hob all that time, heating them up everyday to take a portion and then leaving it to cool down. Or she’ll cook a big lasagne and the same thing - leave it in the oven for days until it’s finished. I can’t drink a cup of tea at their house - I always thought it tasted a bit odd when I first me them and then I realised that they don’t keep milk in the fridge, they keep it on the worktop.

When they come to stay she will always bring something she’s cooked - really nice of her but it will be some sort of meat which she will have cooked days before and it will have just been left on the side in her kitchen.

FIL just dropped a roast chicken at the door merrily saying they cooked two on Friday and didn’t need it. This chicken won’t have seen a fridge - it will have been sat on the work top or in the oven since cooked.

Dh has had a go at me because I won’t let the kids have any for dinner this evening. I don’t want them getting ill.

We moved across the country to where they live just before lockdown so it’s not been a problem yet, but when they are allowed the kids over I know they will feed them and I’m so uncomfortable with the lack of food hygiene they have - it was easier being so far away as they would visit every 6 weeks and I just wouldn’t give the children any of the cooked food they brought with them.

Dh won’t listen as it’s been like that his whole life, his argument is that he’s never had a stomach bug from it so it’s
Fine.

It just makes me feel so ill thinking about it. The arguments me and Dh have about me putting food in the fridge is unreal, he doesn’t see the harm.

[CantSayJack]

Yuk yuk yuk 🤢🤮

I’d be putting my foot down. If your DH wants to eat the food then that’s his choice but he has no right to ask you or your children to. Disgusting.

[PrincessHoneysuckle]

I bet they claim to have IBS when really they have the shits every day due to their food 😂

[JustC]

@Soubriquet

I’m no stickler for food hygiene

In fact I used to leave cooked chicken out over night to eat the next day, but it was one day.

The idea of leaving it for several days has me

And surely heating, cooling, reheating, cooling and reheating again is a paradise for salmonella?

Pretty much what I was going to type word for word.
OP your husband must have one heck of an imune system to have survived all that 😁

[emotionalrangeofateaspoon]

As someone who works within food hygiene in commercial businesses this is so so bad! Please don't let your children eat at their house!

[Poppinjay]

Bacteria will be growing in the food that's left on the side or in the oven. Up until now, it clearly hasn't been anything really nasty so they have got away with it.

Heating it through thoroughly each time will have helped to keep it bacteria-free but they may not understand how ill the toxins produced by bacteria can make you, even if the bacteria have just been killed off by the heat.

If you cook a chicken in the oven and leave it in there, there shouldn't be anything in there to contaminate it so I can see why it's usually fine. Most of the time, you get away with it. It's just that, when you get it wrong and something nasty gets in there and starts breeding, it can make you really poorly or even be fatal.

I wouldn't let a young child take that risk or take it myself.

[Billyjoearmstrong]

@Sparklfairy the thought did cross my mind!

[sadeyedladyofthelowlandsea]

Christ, I thought I was bad about food hygiene, but this seriously made me boak.
It's definitely a thing with some people though - a friend of mine used to make a massive pot of chicken soup, leave it out on the hob, and then, in her words 'boil it up' every day for about a week whilst she merrily worked her way through it.
Does your DH actually have any understanding of food hygiene? Or is a fridge just an ornament to him?

[ekidmxcl]

If PILs and DH want to be filthy like that, then that is their concern.

However, it is absolutely unacceptable to feed this bacteria laden stuff to kids. Your DH is extremely unreasonable and must be stupid if he cannot read basic food hygiene information online.

[zscaler]

That’s horrendous. I am by no means overly cautious about food hygiene but that is seriously disgusting and dangerous. I think your husband needs to wake up to the dangers of this .

[SunshineCake]

His children are not 100% the same gene pool as him s the fact he survived doesn't mean his kids would.

One only needs chicken food poisoning once for it to live in your stomach forever and potentially can lead to food intolerances.

They are your kids so it is in you to make sure they aren't made ill. You know it is a risk and it is your job to make sure it doesn't happen.

[thatwouldbeanecumenicalmatter]

Holy hell wtf have I just read?! 😳🤮

I really sympathise Billyjoearmstrong, your last post obviously indicates the food hygiene is one of many worrying issues with your PILs. Might be worth considering posting in Relationships as this sounds bloody stressful

[OneHanded]

A day on the counter doesn’t matter, we live in a cool climate, but after that it’s best to pop in the fridge.

[SisyphusAndTheRockOfUntidiness]

I am really relaxed about use-by dates on food, leaving food out overnight to cool, etc. I often leave a pot of stew out for a couple of days if it's winter (we don't heat our kitchen at all apart from the heat coming from the oven). But the OP's post made me feel really queasy.

Actually, on reading the OP's further posts, I could believe these were my PILs if my BIL had a partner. They sound worryingly similar. I won't eat anything MIL has made (FIL doesn't cook), to the extent that if we go for the afternoon (rarely) I take a salad. They don't believe in eating vegetables, luckily (!)

[PickAChew]

Ugh, that's pretty extreme.

My ex used to do that with his rank curries. He insisted that the spices kept them fresh.

[Letsnotusemyname]

Are you the sibling I never knew I had?

Some years ago, when my Dad was still alive would regularly complain of upset stomachs.

I’d phone up to see how they were and be told ‘Oh your Dad has a bad stomach.’

They never got it that left overs don’t keep forever, that cooked stuff at the top of the fridge, uncooked lower down.

I used to curate their fridges ( they had several) chuck away the out of date, previously warmed up, mouldy food. I’d do it quietly.

Turned out my sister was doing the same on her visits too.

Wind the clock on 5 years an my Mum, now moved and widowed) still tries to do the same - but my brother checks her fridge now.

Its hard work.

[CodenameVillanelle]

@littlemeitslyn

'Fucking' fish? Nice

Are you tone policing the OP for swearing?

[PickAChew]

Cool climate is irrelevant. Our houses are not cold enough to stop bacteria from multiplying. It's only 10C outside, at the moment, but my kitchen is 23C.

[bumbleb33s]

"Fucking" fish, I thought that was hilarious

OMG I feel sick reading that! The problem you have is you're never going to change them, your DH has grown up with it and he/they don't think they're doing anything wrong.

Maybe when your children go over they can have a takeaway instead ... really don't know how you're going to sort it , but feel for you :(

[cheeseismydownfall]

Oh my goodness! I am very relaxed about food hygiene by MN standards, but that is way past what I would even consider!

[callmeadoctor]

Once again, its the old mumsnet classic, you don't have an inlaw problem, you have a DH problem. Seriously I would refuse your kids staying, even if they promise more hygiene, can you believe them? Either that or dh can pay for a takeaway to be delivered every day.

[SunshineCake]

Is it a generational thing ? My jaws are mid 70's and it took a while to work out the reason we felt a bit iffy after a Sunday lunch was because MIL cooked the meat on the Saturday and left it on the side overnight.

[foobio]

Can you send your kids with a really exciting packed lunch whenever they visit, with lots of favourite things and treats so that they can't be tempted to eat PILs cooking instead?

[ChristmasCarcass]

5 days would be pushing it for me in the fridge, honestly.

Seriously, 5 days on the side in summer and it must be putrefying, surely?

[CodenameVillanelle]

Seriously though - you have a DH who won't listen to sense or reason and you've moved to live close to his controlling father - are you ok?

[okiedokieme]

I wouldn't even feed the dog chicken that's been out of the fridge. I'm no stickler for food dates but refrigerating leftovers I'm hot on