Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not pay the fine because I was following my parental instincts?

167 replies

Experimenopause · 26/05/2020 19:47

I have to pay a fine (correctly issued). I am planning to write a letter to the council tonight to explain why I was merely following my parental instincts and why they should contact my MP instead who can explain why it’s important to forgive people like me who mean no harm. AIBU? Grin

OP posts:
slashlover · 26/05/2020 22:27

It wasn't just "one person", slashlover. Not just one of nameless plebs, who can be fined and told off. It was the person who set the rules. That makes a huge difference.

You mean like BJ disappearing off after he left hospital?

Original poster
Experimenopause · 26/05/2020 22:30

Either everyone follows the rule of law or no one does. It cannot be one rule for us and another for others.
TerrapinStation
That’s a highly moronic argument you make. He accepted he made a round trip to Durham. He accepted that in front of all of us. Police attended his property. He was seen on outing again some 30 miles away. And he has not even been fined. Sod it. Why should I pay my hard-earned money for such an insignificant and unintentional mistake?
Why is following rules more important for me than it is for him when it should be the other way around?

OP posts:
Original poster
Experimenopause · 26/05/2020 22:32

Erm because its not relevant to lockdown and any court will tell you so
It is highly relevant. It’s about following rules. It’s about making sure we all follow rules. It’s bigger than the lockdown itself. Hmm

OP posts:
JudyCoolibar · 26/05/2020 22:32

Tell them you were only doing what any loving parent would.

JudyCoolibar · 26/05/2020 22:34

This doesn't even make any sense anyway as DC didn't have any contact with the police during which they could have fined him but didn't, where is the comparison? He wasn't issued with a fine which he's now refusing to pay, how is your situation in any way the same?

There is nothing to stop the police charging him now, so it's a perfectly valid comparison.

Original poster
Experimenopause · 26/05/2020 22:35

@JudyCoolibar

Tell them you were only doing what any loving parent would.
That’s a nice line. Will as it tomorrow morning. Smile
OP posts:
slashlover · 26/05/2020 22:35

Right. So because DC broke the rules, then everybody should? Robbery? Murder? Or just actions you deem to be an insignificant mistake? (Which cannot be confirmed as you refuse to tell us what it is).

JudyCoolibar · 26/05/2020 22:35

I realise you're trying a bit of smart arsery to make a point but what ever you think of DC there is some doubt about whether he broke a law.

Really? How about road safety laws, to say nothing of issues around child safeguarding?

Pepperwort · 26/05/2020 22:36

You mean like BJ disappearing off after he left hospital?

Genuinely not quite sure what you mean by this, sorry. If it's a direct comparison - Johnson was genuinely ill (as far as we know) in ICU and at death's door, so him taking off a week or even two to recover is one thing. If he had got in a car and driven off to the far side of the country in that time, potentially infecting others, while complaining he was too ill to pick up a pen, then I wouldn't be impressed. It's true he hasn't been much in evidence through his short term as prime minister, and I don't find that impressive either.

BlackberryCane · 26/05/2020 22:37

There isn't any doubt about whether his account of the Barnard Castle trip means he broke the law. He did. The rules were so badly drafted that the initial trip up to Durham might not have been illegal. Don't confuse the two.

Original poster
Experimenopause · 26/05/2020 22:39

Right. So because DC broke the rules, then everybody should?
Wrong. Because when people like him break the law so blatantly and act like he is doing, there is no way to trust what else they are getting away with in place where no one can see them.
That’s the thing that is bigger than the lockdown itself now.

OP posts:
slashlover · 26/05/2020 22:42

If it's a direct comparison - Johnson was genuinely ill (as far as we know) in ICU and at death's door, so him taking off a week or even two to recover is one thing.

He lives at number 10, he disappeared off to Chequers, While confirmed to have it.

Original poster
Experimenopause · 26/05/2020 22:47

Johnson was genuinely ill (as far as we know) in ICU and at death's door
I would quite like to see the medical records of Johnson versus other patients in that hospital, other south east hospitals and then the hospitals across the country.
Only then I will accept he was given the standard treatment and not given a preferential treatment that other patients didn’t receive until it was too late. I would like to see those medical decisions, analyse those data and then decide for myself whether or not he was at the door of death.

You see? I have lost all faith in this lot. I want to know what else they are getting away with.
Gove had the cheek to say today that he too, in the past, has gone off for long drives to check his eye sight. What the fuck is wrong? They are not stupid. Not this stupid at least. So what else is going on?

OP posts:
slashlover · 26/05/2020 22:48

I thought your point was "he wasn't punished for doing something worse than me so I shouldn't pay" but you're saying it's "I've lost all faith in the system so I shouldn't pay"?

Original poster
Experimenopause · 26/05/2020 22:50

Nope slashover. You didn’t even begin to get my point.

OP posts:
Pepperwort · 26/05/2020 22:55

I would be prepared to admit that the leader of the country needs the best health care we can provide to be honest. But he has to return the privileges afforded him by necessity by not abusing them, or us.

Sorry again - ignorant midlander here. Where is Chequers and how far away is it, was he taken by ambulance, etc etc. It's not in the far north of the country, I know that much. But you have a fair point, in that Johnson should also be abiding by the same basic laws that apply to all of us.

It comes down to that - whether you believe that social status needs to be earned and is still limited by law. England once fought a civil war and cut off a King's head to say that it should, and thus the power of the monarch was constrained, along with that of heredity, and the path cleared to further levels of democracy and equality. How far have we fallen? Do people want the leader of the country to be someone above the law, and further, able to appoint His Royal Favourites into that same privilege? If so I really really really want to be in Scotland, right now. That is why the op is saying this is more than lockdown. Quite correctly.

AlwaysAnEmptySpace · 26/05/2020 22:55

DC has explained why he chose to do what he did and believes he did the right thing. If you can argue your way out of your fine due to exceptional circumstances, as he believes he had, then do so. It sounds like you accept you did wrong though with no room for any doubt so I don’t understand why you think your circumstances have anything to do with what’s happened with DC.

You sound childish.

TSSDNCOP · 26/05/2020 22:56

Well then OP, as you are so certain that you should be treated no differently to DC, I shall enjoy hearing about you walking into your council office tomorrow and announcing loudly that you intend to stand shoulder to shoulder with the elitist cunt Dominic Cummings and can also do what you deem fit.

I'm betting Carole behind the counter will be dead impressed.

slashlover · 26/05/2020 22:57

So what IS your point? You don't trust the system?

Original poster
Experimenopause · 26/05/2020 23:02

If you can argue your way out of your fine due to exceptional circumstances, as he believes he had, then do so. It sounds like you accept you did wrong though
I believe I did wrong, just like he did. And I believe I will walk away from this fine because I will successfully argue it using DC as an example.
By your analogy though, our country is being run by some extremely childish people who have the power to do all important decisions about us and our children. I don’t think you wanted to write that intentionally.

OP posts:
HateIsNotGood · 26/05/2020 23:03

Apparently - any fines issued when childcare exceptions were a mitigating factor will be revisited. Hopefully you will be refunded OP.

Or, you could refuse any refund and declare that you were indeed wrong and no exception applied to you.

YANBU btw.

Original poster
Experimenopause · 26/05/2020 23:04

I'm betting Carole behind the counter will be dead impressed.
That is exactly what I am aiming for. Let’s hope I achieve it. Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
Experimenopause · 26/05/2020 23:06

So what IS your point? You don't trust the system?
I don’t want to pay any fine into a system that says all people are equal but some are more equal than others.

OP posts:
TSSDNCOP · 26/05/2020 23:07

It's just being silly though when the actual issue of DC getting away with what he did and not being booted from his job is actually very, very serious.

So serious that saying you're not paying a fine for, I don't knowing, mixing your wet and dry recycling, just makes your point look silly.

DC was wrong. Of that there is no doubt, whether he was actually or technically wrong isn't the point. He has a serious job in serious times and with the privilege of his job should come great responsibility. His actions jeopardise the way that law abiding people will behave as we exit lockdown and I see that as deadly serious.

If you are equally outraged get on the phone or email your MP. Email Downing St and don't let it drop.

AlwaysAnEmptySpace · 26/05/2020 23:09

I believe I did wrong, just like he did.

He doesn’t believe he did wrong though. Confused you think he did wrong, but he believes what he did comes under exceptional circumstances and was right. Whereas you believe you did wrong. 🤷🏻‍♀️