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Original poster

Sam Smith

196 replies

pumpkinbump · 26/05/2020 12:58

This may be old news but I have just come across it whilst reading another thread here and had a bit of a Google to find out about it.

Straight away, the headline - Sam Smith asks to be referred to as “they” instead of “he” after declaring themself as gender neutral.

Now I don't like the bloke for many reasons but isn't asking to be referred to as 'they' implying that there is more than one?

Yes I know this is a pointless thread but I'm curious.

OP posts:
Eckhart · 26/05/2020 14:50

On a serious note, I don't see why we, society as a whole should be forced to redefine the meanings of certain pronouns like 'they' and 'them

Nobody is being forced to do anything. Get off yer 'orse. It's not up to you to define what's easier for people, they are responsible for themselves. As are you. You can ask for what you want, just like Sam Smith can. It doesn't mean you're making anybody do anything.

zscaler · 26/05/2020 14:53

Faux confusion as in pretending it’s confusing because what you actually want to do is criticise someone you don’t even know.

“They for single person” on google would have cleared up any real confusion. So you’re obviously posting because your point is not a genuine enquiry

Quite.

ASandwichNamedKevin · 26/05/2020 14:57

What kind of place do you work in @pumpkinbump? Several people in my workplace have a preferred pronoun on their email signature so people can get it right.

The way I see it is it must be really difficult for some people to feel so outside the "norm" and if calling them "they" makes their life a tiny bit easier then why wouldn't I?

It would be great if we had a gender neutral third person singular pronoun that didn't also coincide with the third person plural, maybe that will evolve.
"They" is really useful anyway if you get an email telling you to contact Chris or Alex and you can ask for "their" details and not use "his" or "her" and get it wrong.

Original poster
pumpkinbump · 26/05/2020 14:57

Sam Smith has requested that he be referred to as they/them. So if I had dealings with him and he was indeed in earshot and I referred to him as 'he', I'm sure he would take offence would he not?

I'm not on a high horse. I don't care what people refer to me as. My point was though that if his request was ignored, he would probably throw a fit.

OP posts:
Eckhart · 26/05/2020 14:57

Are you truly that ignorant OP or just trying to start a bun fight

It's the bun fight one.

Lordfrontpaw · 26/05/2020 14:57

It is their choice to ask for their preferred address to be used for whatever reason they have come up with. It’s my choice to listen and consider it.

So - I would feel odd calling my old boss ‘Lord ex-boss’ - so I just yelled ‘hey (first name) - long time no see!’ When I spotted him in the street the other week. He didn’t have a fit.

What did people call Prince when he changes his name to a symbol? He asked, did people oblige?

Eckhart · 26/05/2020 15:01

I'm sure he would take offence would he not

if his request was ignored, he would probably throw a fit

Pure projection. You don't know Sam. You are anticipating without grounding someone else's reactions, and pre-judging them for it. Because you think you're right and they're wrong. That's what being on a high horse means, but I expect you've not heard that phrase before either...

fuckinghellthisshit · 26/05/2020 15:02

DB said everyone on set referred to Sam Smith as 'Sam Smith' or by pointing. No one referred to him as they or him. It is absurd for a very rich, young, successful man to be claiming victim points in this world. He is absurd and his corona-tantrum-meltdown sums him up.

Original poster
pumpkinbump · 26/05/2020 15:04

In my original post it states that I had already found out that 'they' was being used for a single person, as in the case of Sam Smith.

If I come here to post about it and get opinions what is wrong with that? I do not like him, I've made no attempt to hide that, but neither have I gone out of my way to slag him off on this thread, tempting as it has been, because that isn't the reason I started the thread.

OP posts:
LillianBland · 26/05/2020 15:05

He is absurd and his corona-tantrum-meltdown sums him up.

This. I couldn’t care less what he calls himself. The thing he will be most remembered for is that pathetic, gurning and weeping about being so hard done by, in lockdown. Then he was spotted later, having bought a carry out coffee.

Original poster
pumpkinbump · 26/05/2020 15:07

**Pure projection. You don't know Sam. You are anticipating without grounding someone else's reactions, and pre-judging them for it.

Judging by his meltdown he filmed himself having and then posting it out to the world showing him crying into the camera because he spent a day or two in lockdown, I'm pretty sure he would.

OP posts:
Iggi999 · 26/05/2020 15:10

Did he post it or did someone else post it? It doesn't sound like the kind of thing you'd post about yourself.

Original poster
pumpkinbump · 26/05/2020 15:14

He posted it. Even if he hadn't and someone else did, sending it to someone in the first place would be bad enough. After people lashing out at him he tried to pass it off as a joke. Absolute rubbish. Wouldn't have been a very funny joke even if it were true that that's the way it was intended.

OP posts:
donquixotedelamancha · 26/05/2020 15:14

I'm just here for the deletion message. You can't criticise Sams Smith on MN.

EmbarrassedUser · 26/05/2020 15:16

I refuse point blank to listen to his music as I won’t pander to his whims. Plus his music is shit.

Eckhart · 26/05/2020 15:17

So you know what the reaction would be of a complete stranger, if you said something to them that you'll never say.

Yup. Pointless thread. We agree. Enjoy your negativity.

Original poster
pumpkinbump · 26/05/2020 15:17

@donquixotedelamancha what do you mean?

OP posts:
Original poster
pumpkinbump · 26/05/2020 15:19

Is it entirely unreasonable to assume what somebody's behaviour might be in a certain situation from their past behaviour?

OP posts:
Yunabrasca · 26/05/2020 15:23

The fact you said they’ve asked to be addressed as “they” instead of “he” then went on to say you don’t like “the bloke” for many reasons definitely comes across antagonistic and more like you’re bashing them or expressing their gender preferences. It doesn’t seem like you have a real reason to dislike Sam Smith besides you’re outdated views. But hey, it’s you’re opinion that you’re allowed to express, just like it’s others opinions to say you’re ignorant.

Eckhart · 26/05/2020 15:27

No, @pumpkinbump, it's just boring and tedious when it's a situation that will never arise. Haven't you got anything better to do than hypothetical bullying?

Original poster
pumpkinbump · 26/05/2020 15:30

I've many reasons to dislike him, even if I didn't, do people need a valid reason to dislike someone?

Not sure which of my views are outdated.

Calling him a bloke in my original thread wasn't deliberate or an intention to cause an argument. But it proves my point, a stranger on the internet has taken offence to me referring to someone who claims to be non-binary person for attention as a bloke, so why wouldn't SS taken offence?

OP posts:
Original poster
pumpkinbump · 26/05/2020 15:34

@Eckhart how am I bullying him? Many people really hate him with a passion. There are people on this thread who have called him names. Why aren't people entitled to an opinion or spark a conversation about something they don't fully understand in order to learn more about it and hear others opinions on the subject without people calling them ignorant and a bully?

I'm sure there are people you dislike in the music or movie business. Or do you reserve judgement until you actually get to know them in real life?

OP posts:
Coyoacan · 26/05/2020 15:36

I really feel sorry for people battling to remember everyone's special pronouns and not cause offense. We usually don't even think about pronouns when we are talking and automatically use they when we don't know someone's sex and automatically use he/she when we do.

SouthernComforts · 26/05/2020 15:37

I don't enjoy Sam's music so I don't follow him on social media or anything so the last time I saw him was on Graham Norton and he looked an absolute mess. I think he's aiming for a more feminine Boy George look but he looked extremely uncomfortable with himself. He doesn't seem to be happy in life though so I hope he's getting MH support.

Lordfrontpaw · 26/05/2020 15:37

And there are new ones popping up. And people are so keen to police this too.