How long before I'm allowed to worry??

[butterflyroses]

Ds 15 went out to meet some friends at 2pm (I KNOW!)

He's not back and his phones dead. He's not usually out this long. He's not sleeping at the moment and he has no money on him to get food/drink.

How long can I leave it before I really worry??

Yes I know he shouldn't be out, I've had that argument plenty of times with him.

Thank goodness xx

Silly sod . Glad he’s home .
I still struggle to sleep when ds goes out at night and he’s 20 next week

Glad he is home. Mine used to drive me to distraction not answering his phone.

Grrrr monkey!! Glad he's safe! Glad he is annoyed too- let him know you will always do that. It's never ok to be out of contact that long. Xx

So glad he’s safe home

Thank goodness

MN need to stop suggesting call the Police.
A 15 year old went out at 2/3pm and by 6/7pm phone the police?
Ridiculous if you think they'd do anything, teach your DS that phone MUST be fully charged and agree time to return.

I'm glad he got home. I wouldn't have words with him. He will already know he's made you worry. If he is only having a few hours sleep a night it wouldn't be a surprise if he was feeling very foggy headed.

Sometimes they hear you more if you are sympathetic to them rather than cross.
Obviously you know your son better than me though 😅

Is he getting any help with his insomnia?

I must be in the minority but I fail to see the issue. He went out at 2pm and you were having kittens that he wasn’t back at dinner time?

9pm is a reasonable time to be back at 15; it wasn’t dark yet and he was with friends. I can’t believe you were considering phoning the police.

So pleased he's home safe and sound Op.

Can you not just get a list of his mates numbers for use when there might be a problem?, we've done this with DD's and more than once its been very usefull and saved a LOT of worry!!

Phones are allways running sort of battery!

I would be worried too my daughter NEVER missed food time at that age

Right, I've decided - I'm skipping the teenage years. Not happening. My eldest is 12- I've got six months to work out the practicalities.

glad he is home safe!

lesson for him to learn - keep in touch, or mum will embarrass you- totally acceptable parenting :)

Thank goodness! Glad he's back okay

Phew! I am sure you are so relieved x

Glad he's OK. Maybe get him a mobile charging pack he can take out and about with him?

www.missingpeople.org.uk/how-we-can-help/families-and-friends/reporting-a-missing-person/879-what-will-the-police-do.html

@amusedbush @OtterBe4

The first few hours are the most critical if you're intending to find a missing person. You can call immediately and do not need to wait 24 hours. The police will then a tell you a recommended course of action, based on their fairly extensive experience of such things. It's folly to advise anyone not to report for fear of wasting police time- if something has happened, the time taken to wait until it's absolutely obvious something horrible must have happened can be vital.

I'm glad he's safe. I'm in Scotland and and this still isn't allowed, my kids havent seen their friends since March.

@four
Try not be so condescending, a 15 year old out for a few hours is not an emergency, be realistic

Hope you were crashing the Hoover into DS' bedroom door by 9 a.m., OP

@OtterBe4 Disagreeing with someone does not make you condescending.

And it depends entirely on the circumstances. It could well be an emergency, and I'm sure if you think about it you can come up with a number is scenarios in which that might be the case. The person best qualified to assess the likelihood of that is the person who knows the fifteen year old. So other posters present it as an option or say it's what they'd do if their own fifteen year old did the same and the OP can decide what to do from there. In this instance she decided to wait until later to call and was right to do so. But if the OP had felt that she should call the police, people coming on here and telling her off for overreacting would not help and could potentially lose valuable time in an emergency by causing her to second-guess her instincts.

Try not be so condescending, a 15 year old out for a few hours is not an emergency, be realistic

It wasn't this time, but would you say the same to those parents whose teens went out one day and never came home? The parents of Andrew Gosden, for example, or Alex Sloley?

It's not condescending to say that the first few hours are often the riskiest.

@four
You were condescending with your idiots guide to a missing person.
OP knew he was out with friends and hadn't even agreed a time so her panic was uncalled for, did he say I'll be 30 minutes?

@OtterBe4

You were condescending with your idiots guide to a missing person.

I didn't see the word 'idiot' printed anywhere on it- I googled how long to wait to report a missing person and that popped up. It's from a reputable source and, again, just because it runs contrary to your opinion, that doesn't make it condescending.

It had been five hours, he hadn't been sleeping, had no money, food or drink with him and wasn't contactable. OP was justified in being worried and others were justified in saying they'd call the police if it were their fifteen year old. A lot can happen in five hours. Official advice is that if you're worried enough to call the police you should, regardless of how long it's been.