Aibu to make my 'friend' move her horse from my field?

[lonelylou09]

Hi mum's netter.. Advice appreciated please.
5 year ago I was lucky enough to take over a field near my house for my horse. I was sharing with someone and then she moved so my best friend talked me into letting her put her horse in the field too.
To cut a long story short I was reluctant as she is very lazy and very tight with money even though she is much more well off than me financially. But she promised to pay her way and pull her weight.
So for 3 years it was just as if expected, with me doing all the work with both the field and the horses and also always having to chase her for money.
So last year I sold my horse and agreed that she could use the field for a year while it was still under my name. She paid the rent to the landlord in advance and moved a mutual friends horse in.
She knew I was devastated over selling my horse and I thought she would let me help out with hers as and when like I had before. I said to her that I would like some form of payment for items is bought but couldn't sell because her horse was using them... Fencing, watering equipment, gates ect.
She said she'd discuss it with her husband and let me know.
So a year down the line and she's not spoken to me once since the day my horse was sold, her husband has badgered me everytime I've seen him to sign the contract over to them while telling me they won't give me any money for any of my things as they are worthless or they have broken them anyway. The mutual friend who moved her horse in unfriended me at the same time and hasn't spoken to me since.
So... Am I being unreasonable to give them both their marching orders?!!
I wish to buy another horse and be in my field without people there how don't speak to me, don't look after their horses and will be a pain in the arse to get the money out of...
I've got other horse friends who will pay me that are no problem so it then won't cost me anything for my horse.
She has technically one week left that she has paid for even though she still owes me money from before.
Just wondering how others view this situation and how to go about telling her to sling her horses somewhere else.
Ta

Yanbu but How are you going to make them?

Your field, your rules. Lazy horse owners are the worst.

OP I strongly suspect you will lose your field if you carry on in this way.

You need them out now. You need to be strong and do this properly. Then, you need to make good the damage, spray the weeds, poo pick and repair the fencing. They won’t pay, so don’t argue the point. Just do it.

Fields to rent that a suitable and convenient for horses are in short supply and high demand. You really need to be clever here or you’ll not get your tenancy renewed.

Oh dear. This isn’t going to be easy for you OP. I doubt they will take much notice of your polite request to vacate.
I’m normally the sort of person that will always try and find a fair and reasonable solution to problems but, in this case, I don’t think that approach would work!
Maybe extreme, and not very fair or reasonable but given the circumstances, I would consider removing the horses yourself and delivering to their door. Clear your field and padlock the gate. Put a sign on saying private, keep out.
Their horses are their problem. Not yours!
Good luck

What dreadful people. I hope you get this sorted.

Tell them to be out within a week. One week later next time they are out for a ride, get the bolt cutters out and change the lock. If they try to come back in call the police about trespassers.

You have to be hard as nails and use actions over words with aggressive chancers like this.

@lonelylou09 pretty much all you’ll be told is to get BHS gold membership on Horse and Hound, they are useful for free legal advice.

Your ex mate has no right to be on the field and hasn’t been there long enough for squatting rights. Just give them a date to leave. If they don’t, then you’ll need advice. I don’t see why you can’t move the horse, but obviously it costs money to put a horse on a livery yard.

Yanbu but I dont think you were ever friends, the hint was st the start you feeling the need to say they had more money but she was right. So tbh I'd be interested to hear the friend's pov, you said you knew she was going to be lazy but then later was gutted they weren't allowing you to do more with the horse-do you mean you wanted to ride her horse and they didnt let you?

You can't move the horse because practically speaking it needs somewhere to go. You can't just tie it to the woman's door knob.

Give them a weeks notice and hold firm

OP if you think it will help, ask posters here what to say in your email, and then again for every subsequent step. It can really help to have some back up.

@stayathomer yes perhaps confusing I'd said that but what I meant was for the mutual friend I'd previously spent 2 years helping her out with her horses and her yard when I didn't have mine. Anyone who has horses knows most of us don't have a lot of spare time so are generally grateful for help with care and exercising as and when needed. Some people pay to have their horses looked after while others pay for the riding. As for my friend I'd looked after her horse everyday for 3 years and on occasion exercised it too as they were too lazy. So I had in some way thought they would say something like 'if you miss horses don't worry you can still come and hang out or use ours if you like' as I had done in the past but obviously only when it suited them.

@category12 perhaps not but they do both have horseboxes outside their houses so I could do that 🤣🤣... Joking obviously

@TorkTorkBam yep that could work but I've only seen my friends horse out of the field 2x and never the mutual friends. I doubt at the moment they would risk both leaving the field at once hence the new lock on the gate

Ah, that’s Fair enough, thought you might just have meant riding (used to be a groom, had up to stage 1 exams then fall off day before exams!)

good luck OP.. stand firm

Get them out as asap - you owe them nothing! What is the point of having horses that never leave the field, what a waste of time and money

You are too passive. OK so they are too conniving to take both horses out at the same time. You have to find another action that physically gets the horses out and has all the shouting afterwards.

I'd be inclined to pay someone to transport the horses to a horse rescue charity at an extreme.

At the other end of the scale, when they next turn up I would be waiting with a hose pipe on jet and I'd blast the fuckers with it until they and their horses were out of the field.

Or, most likely for me, next time they arrive I would be waiting with two handymen who would physically remove the entire gate. Your trespassers then leave their horses in a field with no gate or take the horses away. Not your problem where or how (but given they have horse boxes they won't be totally fucked).

In my experience if you let your friend network know you have cheeky fuckers refusing to vacate your property and you want to take the gate off, you will have several offers from people who will happily take shifts to sit waiting with a screwdriver. People hate a cheeky fucker.

Do you need to see a solicitor?

Can you take their horses to their homes and literally hand deliver them? Obviously you would need help to do both at the same time? Then change locks?

Thanks for everything you great mumsnetters. I've had a panicky night as I couldnt find my contract but found it now.
It does say no sharing or subletting but I have copies of the emails I exchanged at the time with the estate agent and I said very clearly that I would be sharing with a friend to help with the land and costs and he emails back to say that's acceptable, that's its just to prevent me running a livery or making money from it.
I've kept a record of everything I've spent on the field against what I have taken as payment for sharing so I can if challenged prove that I was told I was allowed to share and also that monies taken where reinvested in the field itself.
I do know someone who is a solicitor so going to try to get hold of them and see if they can advise me.

@RandomMess yes I could if it comes to that. It would take me about 20 minutes to hand deliver them both but I do live in a small community and worry how that will be perceived. But that is definitely an idea if it comes to it.
Id be more likely to name a date and time and if the horses aren't removed by then I would put them both in the pen with the gate lock cut off.
I could even park my car in there to block access if need be.

I think they are banking on you not wanting to make a scene etc.

Time to start spreading the word to the local gossips at how they are being CF using the field and refuse to speak to you anymore etc and how hurt you are and how much getting the field horse suitable cost.

@stayathomer
Yes it prehaps says a lot that I mentioned they were more well off that me but I don't say it in a jealous way. Just the fact that I was a single mum working full time struggling to do what I could while they own 3 homes and have holidays and trips constantly and have everything they want and yet they would still take whatever they could off me for the fun of it. I've borrowed them things I've never seen again that I've had to replace, they have broken more of my things than I can think of and then laughed about it.