That it’s women who are still locked down?

[Sadie789]

My DH goes back to work next week and rightly so, long overdue in my opinion.

However, I can’t go back to work as with two young DC we have no childcare and it’s not possible to do my job from home.

Under normal circumstances without childcare it wouldn’t really be an issue as there would be classes and clubs and play parks and soft plays and friends to meet up with, so a full weekly schedule out and about with things to do.

I can’t take them to the supermarket or round the shops either, no grandparents allowed etc.

As it stands none of these things are available nor are likely to be for a while, so for me my situation has not changed from the initial lockdown - stay at home, go out for exercise (weather permitting).

Meanwhile my DH and the Hs of my friends are all back at work out of the house living normal days. At the weekends the golf is back on so that’s a leisure option.

Many of my friends are also trying to work from home while looking after children, some also homeschooling older ones.

Women who don’t have children are also on the back foot as many of the professions which are traditionally female - hair and beauty, retail, hospitality - remain closed and will be for some time.

Meanwhile men are back in the workplace. When furlough ends it will be those who are able to present for work and give all their attention to their job who are preferred by employers. Recruitment will be skewed by this too. It’s the traditionally male industries that are able to return earlier- outdoor and manual work.

When it does return childcare is likely to be limited in hours and more expensive- Scotland has quietly dropped the 30 free hours from
August that were going to make it financially viable for me to work. Now it’s going to be a matter of me earning a couple of hundred pounds extra per month instead of nearly £1000 that was previously the case.

I am far from a feminist, but it feels like any equality women had gained is being seriously eroded by lockdown and the exit strategy that has deftly avoided any conversation around how women, especially with younger children, are getting the raw deal.

OP, I've been Forloughed since it all kicked off. And I agree that women, are getting treated unfairly. I have recently found out that my male maternity leave cover has been called in, instead off me "to do my job". In fact most of my male colleagues have been called back in to do work, not one woman at all in my department. I'm seething with rage, as I want to get back to normal. Instead after working for the same company for 24 years, I'm up the walls thinking I'm going to lose my job, I've a mortgage and 2 small children to worry about.

Feminism is not about armpit hair or hating men or whining or victim playing or laziness or indeed any of the other junky, invented stereotypes that careless or hostile types may spread around for various reasons best know to themselves.

Feminism is simply the radical belief that women and girls are people, too. That's truly all it is. If you believe that being female does not render people subhuman or unimportant or worthless, then you are a feminist whether you know it or not.

Various groups will have a different focus or particular causes, but of course most feminists aren't signed up to any special interest group at all but are just ordinary women and men getting on with life and doing their best to raise their children, if they have them, the best they can. You wouldn't spot them until they speak up about something that touches their values.

Nobody need ever be embarrassed or ashamed about being called a feminist. In fact it is puzzling to me how anyone, female or male, can honestly say they aren't or that they don't know. Five minutes thought about whether women and girls are people or not woukd sort that out.

Have the rules changed in Scotland? It’s still under
Lockdown.

@TrueFriendsStabYouInTheFront
Anything can be turned into a feminist issue if that's the way you look at the world
If this is true then what does it suggest about our society and how deep and wide the inequality permeates?

But the truth is majority of us know and plan this before having kids surely?! So why turn it into something it's now?
What is the alternative for many women though if they want children? I imagine the vast majority would be unwilling to sacrifice having children altogether just because they recognise that the inequality between men and women will mean that they are much more likely to have their career and financial position detrimented through starting a family

The imbalance between the sexes exists due to a plethora of cultural and biological reasons that are difficult to unpick. In fact, I recently watched a talk where someone spoke about inequality being so interwoven into our culture and our life experiences that most people will never even notice it, in the same way a fish doesn't notice it's swimming in water.

I think OP makes a valid point that the impact of Coronavirus and the lockdown will mean that some women will suddenly see elements of the inequality that had previously been masked or softened by being able to use external childcare or help to support the family. For example, how many dad's have taken the lead for homeschooling their child? How many men have taken over the domestic chores that would have ordinarily been done by the cleaner? I would bet good money that in the vast vast majority of cases women have taken on the bulk of additional childcare/homeschooling/cleaning that has arisen during lockdown and that this is true even when men and women are working comparable hours.

I see where you're coming from but I work in the NHS which is predominately female and the large majority of people have been going in as normal.

‘You probably just know couples where men are the higher earners’? Sure. Of course this is a feminist issue!

The irony of not wanting to be seen as a feminist whilst simultaneously complaining that men have the privileged position coming out of lockdown. Genius OP.

@Waiting1987 and @BigGlasses I had a letter through from my local council (East Renfrewshire) to say the free 30 hours from Aug 2020 would no longer be offered due to the financial pressures of the coronavirus situation on providers. The letter said they would be back in touch in May to discuss moving forward but heard nothing yet.

My DS will only be 2 in August so I don’t know if perhaps it’s the ‘new’ funding for 2 year olds that’s affected? Or any funding which would start from then, meaning those who have already been using it aren’t affected? I don’t know.

I would say contact the local authority. It would not surprise me if this kind of info isn’t being advertised on their websites. Arseholes. But it may all be dependent on where you are etc.

In our house it’s dh working from home and I’ve been working throughout lockdown in a hospital. We earn similar amounts. I’ve never been one for traditional roles. I’m getting frustrated by all the mum martyrs who seem to believe they’re the only ones who can do childcare properly. My experience is that employers are understanding and all my friends are sharing responsibilities regardless of earnings. Has your dh asked? Have you considered sharing?

You have a dh at home, the problem isn't there is no childcare/school for you to go back to work so you are disadvantaged as a woman. It is not as simple as that.

The problem is you earn less than your dh so you, as a family, chose to prioritise money to pay the bills and your dh goes back to work first. That is your choice. Why do you earn less? Is it because you, or both of you as a family, didn't prioritise your education and/or career or was it because you were genuinely disadvantaged as a woman?

Woman cannot make choices which impact their long-term careers then simplify the whole thing and call the disadvantaged card when it suits them. It damages progress and allows those social norms to continue.

There are many many families where woman are back at work before men as it make more sense financially. Your issue is your own personal circumstances, it isn't new or eroded by lockdown, it has always been there. Now you have recognised it you need to decide if you want to change it.

I think many women make choices in their 20s that will impact on their lives for many more years than they realise.

I hear what you are saying and sympathise
But it reflects the choices you have made
In my house me and DH will be sharing work and childcare

And I am modelling this behaviour to my sons as well as my daughter

Yes I get you.

I think it's a mess! How long can they keep everywhere closed before destroying our country. All these places we use for fitness and fun will be struggling to stay afloat.

We can't use our local national trust park because it's an outdoor ticket venue. We paid yearly for that. We can't go swimming. We can't go into shops and to visit people like you say.

But they've opened up places for men like golfing.

If golfing can reopen why can't children go in play areas and sit outside and have a drink with relatives.

i don’t understand where you are coming from here ? Are you complaining that your husband earns more than you or that social distancing is not necessary in traditional female jobs or that the government should somehow provide infection free childcare or that you have to look after your own kids while your husband gets to out of that by going to work ?.

Welcome to Feminism Sadie - now that the scales have fallen from your eyes you are going to start noticing the inequality everywhere in your and women's lives! Come on over to Feminist Chat - it's a great board !

If golfing can reopen why can't children go in play areas and sit outside and have a drink with relatives

Golf, like snooker and darts, lends itself well to social distancing. It's easy to stay 2m apart playing these games. Women can play these games if they want to, the likes of Fallon Sherrock and Charley Hull would agree. Children in play areas are unlikely to respect the current instructions.

Women can play golf!

Has Scotland dropped the 30 hours free childcare? I was depending on this also. Where can I find more info on this please? I've googled it but can't find anything

You do realise it’s 2020

For goodness sake, stop being a martyr. He earns more than you so that's what's driving this. Why don't you go back to work and he stay at home. Or are you not willing/able to survive on your salary?

FWIW I've been working in an office throughout and DH has been at home so no I don't agree with you.

If you allow yourself to be downtrodden you will be.

And whoever suggested that a woman hire a nanny - well, yeah, that’s exactly the issue. Nannies aren’t allowed to work at the mo - so what should the high status woman do during lockdown?

@EinsteinaGogo well I’m 100% with you. I just don’t agree 100% with feminism as a theory of gender equality so don’t use that descriptor for myself. In general though, certain sub branches of the movement align pretty neatly with my own opinions and I don’t think that one has to be a feminist to support feminism in action or certain elements of feminist theory. There’s just no need to force a label on people who don’t want it for whatever reason.

I don’t care about white male privilege or growing my armpit hair or being the top bitch in the boardroom

I clearly don’t have the faintest idea what it involves (smile) and quite happy to stay that way

Ignorance isn't something to be proud of