is 15yo dd eating too much?

[nuttyveg]

i've posted on teenagers, but i haven't gotten many responses, so i thought i'd post here for traffic.
15yo dd has been eating more recently and i don't know if it's too much or not, she's a healthy weight, not like a beanpole but not fat.
today she's had
2 slices of vegan cheese on seedy toast and a milky coffee made with oat milk and stevia for breakfast
about 5 wedges, 4 mini falafels, 3 oreos and a small handful of salt and vinegar crisps for lunch
4 more oreos as a snack
and will be having chickpea and roasted vegetable soup for dinner with a slice or two of seedy bread
and homemade apple cake with custard for pudding
and she usually has a bowl of cereal with oat milk before bed, so i imagine she will tonight too.
thank you for any responses

I honestly don’t think it sounds like that much tbh, When my brothers were teenagers they could have eaten twice that amount and still been on the hunt for more

@nuttyveg It's totally fine that you binged. The key is that you forgive yourself for it and move on. It doesn't define you or make you a bad person. It's a horrible feeling to have to sit with but it will pass and tomorrow is a new day.

@mynameiscalypso no i don't think they are. when i first decided to try and self recover i was planning on bringing it up at my next camhs appointment that was scheduled for about 2 weeks in the future but then lockdown happened and i haven't been able to speak to them since.

I dont think that is too much at all. At 15 I used to eat cheese on toast for breakfast, sandwich at school, rice and chicken or spag bol for dinner and fruit and yoghurt before bed. There wasnt much junk food available where i grew up but we always had içe creams in summer. I was slightly chubby at 15 but by 17 I was a size 6.

My daughter is quite skinny and had a piece of toast, milk and a boiled egg, 3 fish fingers with sweetcorn and a few chips for lunch and for dinner she will have veg soup and maybe a chicken wing. She is 8.

I have not RTFT but that doesn't sound like a lot of food to me at all.
All of my children eat more than that most days, and they are all very slim.
I'd expect a 15yo to eat like an adult, and if I ate that during a day I'd still be hungry.

If she's enjoying the food and was hungry then that should be fine. Please don't criticise her for the amount she is eating, as it can cause some real issues, I speak from experience.

@LimpLettice thank you so much i'll try to see if there are any that do online or email chat instead of calling.

@mynameiscalypso thank you i'm trying to remember that. i'll try tomorrow to have 3 healthyish meals and 2 snacks so that i don't feel hungry and end up binging.

Also, compare it to what she would have had if schools were open. She would still have breakfast and then either a hot meal at school or a packed lunch (sandwich + crisps + biscuit) and then soup for her dinner.

My sister used to hide packets of biscuits and even cans of tuna under her bed at that age but she was also slim by the time she started uni.

Dont worry at all OP

Please do. There's this: www.nhs.uk/Service-Search/Eating%20disorder%20support/LocationSearch/341

Which should give you some contact details for local resources. I really hate to think of anyone facing this unsupported, sounds like you could do with a hug. It's very brave to even come here to chat and admit there's a problem, so a big well done.

Mother of 6: that is definitely not a lot of food at all?

She's eating healthy food and a couple of Oreos never hurt anyone.

The fact you have counted every single morsal of food is way more of a concern to me: it's one thing to know what she ate, it is quite another that you actually counted how much of each thing she had on her plate.

She's a teenager and is still growing. Leave her alone or you will give her an eating disorder/body issues.

Unless she is literally clearing your cupboards out and is eating all bad food what she eats is actually none of your business.

A lot of us do that me with a box of chocolate fingers for example... But seriously, not to belittle your experiences with food, we do tend to crave sugar in the way we don’t crave things like hummus and carrots! I don’t have any answers, I used to binge eat for boredom and comfort but I stopped doing it partly by being busy and partly by thinking before I eat rather than mindless grazing. Everything is quite hard going at the mo with lockdown, it makes it hard being home a lot. I try to temember that I am not a human skip, if I chuck endless rubbish into myself both in terms of what I eat as well as what I read and watch, I’ll feel rubbish. You are eating fine. xx

If you're 15, then you can contact your Head of Year and ask him/her for help. You may feel very alone right now, but believe me, school staff are very aware that teenagers are very vulnerable; often, we've noticed before families have. Is there a Year 10/11 Google Classroom? You could send a private message there.

If not your Head of Year, there's somebody responsible for Safeguarding - sometimes it's an Assistant Head, sometimes it's somebody else - or maybe somebody responsible for your Key Stage or your Form Tutor. Any teacher or other member of staff you get on with will care and want you to be supported, whether you're physically in school or at home.

You've asked the questions here, you've told us your worries.

You can tell somebody you knows you and they will help you.

For a teenager you should be worrying why she not eating more .

I have just seen your messages @nuttyveg

I have 3 teenage boys and an 8 year old girl and the boys probably eat twice as much as you.

Please try not to worry too much. I have recently discovered overnight oats. They are really delicious with lots of nuts and fruit in. I particularly like banana, cinnamon and walnuts with a but of maple syrup 😋

It really doesn't sound like a lot of food to me

DD(13) has eaten today
Bowl of bran flakes and a brioche bun
Chocolate biscuit and glass milk
Small bowl Pasta with tomato sauce and cheese and an apple
A small square of chocolate brownie
For tea will have vegetable risotto and probably ice cream for pudding.

Definitely not much protein today.
Probably will get 5 veg after the risotto.

She did a 20min HITT workout whilst I was doing mine and some hoovering which she claimed was exhausting but otherwise has slobbed around in her room.

She isn't vegan or vegetarian that's just what she/ I have chosen today
I reckon she is a normal weight and no fatter since lockdown despite I would think moving a lot less and freer access to snacks.

I try to enforce some exercise and some fruit and veg every day and I try not to let them snack all day mindlessly but they almost certainly get more sweet stuff than I did as a kid. Probably 2 snacks a day of eg 2 biscuits or a piece of cake something less than healthy at breakfast and something sweet after meals eg yoghurt after lunch and a pudding of some kind after dinner.
DH buys all kind of crap and never tries limit anything or encourage any fruit etc so I have largely given up and this is where we have compromised.

Almost certainly not a Mumsnet approved healthy diet but not wall to wall crap either. I am trying to get them to understand that a meal should have protein and veg as well as carbs and that too many snacks are not good without banning stuff and going on about weight

One thing to seriously think about is whether you’re using being vegan to control and limit your eating.

And as pp have said, lockdown has made a lot of us eat more including myself 🙈

If you enjoy baking why not try some cookies and cakes with hazelnut, pistachio etc.

@LimpLettice thank you i'll definitely have a look at it soon

OMG I'd hate a mum like you .... spying in me and checking on everything I eat!!!! Mums like you give daughters like me eating disorders.

@Commonwasher thank you i think it would be helpful for me to think like you have described about how my body isn't a human skip and that i should be feeding it good food

@MitziK i'm home educated and have been for the past year or so so i don't have a head of year or anything like that to speak to but thank you

Ah just RTFT and realised you are Dd
no- it's not too much food. It's normal

@mixedkebab thank you i might try making that tonight for my breakfast tomorrow morning

Omg I dare share what I’ve eaten today 😱🤫

@PurpleDaisies no, i'm vegan for the moral reasons, not anything else