To feel my employer are suddenly discriminating because I have a young child?

[Tayo23]

I work for a government dpt where it is not usually commonplace to be able to work from home. On 19th/20th March when the schools closed, I was asked in work if this would impact me in regards to childcare - it does, and I was offered a laptop to work from home which I gratefully took.

At this point all my colleagues (except for a minority shielding or in similar positions) remained in the office every day as there were a lack of laptops for them - it was BAU. I worked remotely from home, with colleagues in the office uploading my (and other remote workers) work. A week later my office closed (a non-critical govt dpt) however I have continued to work from home since then although my colleagues without laptops were not working at all. My partner was furloughed a week or so after my office closed so has been a great help keeping 4yo entertained.

At the end of April my office advised those without laptops must return to the office one day a week on a rota basis to upload, (to maintain social distancing). I was not asked because it was understood I was working from home. Last week they provided everyone in my office (around 80 people) with laptops. I have now been told that because everyone else now has a laptop, I am now too required to work one day a week in the office, and spend the rest of the week working from home.

My partner returns to work next week. I now am in same position as end of March before lockdown re childcare. They are allowing me to take special leave for the one day a week I can’t come into the office, for 4 weeks. After then I have to use annual leave. I have repeatedly stressed I am willing to continue working each day from home. I just simply cannot leave my child at home alone. My partner is unable to get paid leave off and we would struggle without his pay.

AIBU to feel this way, they understood initially and accommodated me which I was extremely grateful for. I have worked each day whilst my colleagues barely have done until now, but now they too have the facilities to work from home, the goalposts have been moved.

I am not happy being told when to take AL when I have not asked for any time off. Do I have a leg to stand on here if I take this higher than my own line manager (who robotically regurgitates things without much compassion or consideration for people’s individual circumstances)

For all those saying “how will you work at home with a 4yo when DP returns to work? This will impact your work!”

It’s important to state that been told everyone will be working from home for the next 6-12 months. This isn’t a phased return to a full week in the office. So until DS returns to nursery/school in September. It’s something I have no choice but to adapt to.

The days I’ve taken as annual leave have not been ‘time off’ - no pottering or relaxing. It’s been to supervise home learning more effectively as it’s v hard to do both that and wfh at the same time. I can make the work time up spread over the week but TW day or so annual leave here and there has taken the pressure off. So no it’s not been ‘leave’ in the way it usually is but hey ho, global pandemic and all that! If it means I get to keep my job and shows my employer that I am prepared to also be flexible and make compromises (as they have too) then that’s fine with me. And I’m the higher earner out of me and DP

I’m sorry you have been put in this situation. You’re getting a bit of a grilling on here which seems a tad unfair. Same storm, different boats and all that. Things are changing all the time so I would continue as you are for the next four weeks and consult your HR dept. It’s their job to offer advice and help sort out these sort of issues, is it not? Best of luck - I hope it gets resolved for you one way or another.

Nurseries are reopening in June, childminders can already open. You are being treated equally, it's not discrimination

It feels that when it suited them they were more than happy for me to work 5 days from home

What?

Yes, it doesnt suit them anymore. You have had weeks of accommodation. Now they are asking for some back

Its not an employers role to accommodate only you, forever

Don’t expect to get paid to sit at home and look after my child. I’m willing to continue working remotely as I have proven effective.
You've proven effective when someone else is doing the full time childcare and that's great.
Working well from home when DP is looking after the children is irrelevant when your work have decided that moving forward everyone is needed to do a day on rota in the office.
Working from home with a 4yo is obviously not ideal. But in the current situation millions of people are expected to do it.
Yes but if their employers said they had to be on a rota blending home working and office working then they'd have to do it and their partner would have to step up and do his share of the childcare.

Peggysgettingcrazy

So how it accommodation back from me to take AL on that day and do nothing at all for them? Rather than do something productive from home on that day instead?

So how it accommodation back from me to take AL on that day and do nothing at all for them? Rather than do something productive from home on that day instead?

Because they don't want you at home, they want you in the office...

@ Tayo23 have already asked thus but can’t see an answer - can your DH not take leave as well ?

When will your child's nursery open? Can you get something from them that states this and ask whether you can work from home until this date?

OP I suspect I will be in a similar situation to you soon. My advice would be to put your request in writing to your explaining the difficulties because you have a young child, i.e. ask for a reasonable adjustment i.e. continue to WFH all days (cc HR) and take it from there. I would not be happy being required to use my Annual leave in this situation because this means ultimately that you won't be able to get a proper break in due course.
Ultimately if they refuse you can either accept their compromise or reduce your hours or if extremely unwilling to accommodate go off sick with stress

Why can't your partner stay home 1 day and you stay home 4 days?

No idea what agency you are, but ours are the opposite to yours.... No issues with WFH, and it's going to be this way for weeks if not months.

99ProblemsPlus1

Yes but by being forced to take AL I am not in the office am I. People are remotely working every day, the work needs to be done every day at home too. So my point still stands.

DPs employers aren’t great. He does not have many benefits at all. His boss never has been understanding or accommodating with anything. Whoever DS is sick etc it is always me who stays home taking my AL etc. It frustrates me yes. The business has been off for months due to furlough and his manager will not allow AL for the first few weeks. As people keep pointing out, an employer can tell you when to take AL, they can also deny it too.

I'm sure you are not the only staff member with a child or vulnerable elderly relative or health condition that makes you vulnerable (which you possibly aren't aware of). Those staff members are probably also asking for special arrangements to stay at home.

Just because you were the first to have special arrangements made to allow you to work from home it doesn't mean that you have a right to those special arrangements to continue permanently.

They are reorganising to make it more fair. You lose out. Not discrimination.

No it doesn't though OP. Most people who can't do their job on a particular day have to take AL to cover it, that's not a new concept. You can't just say 'well if I take AL I still won't be there anyway so I'm just going to keep my AL and not go in either', it doesn't work like that.

If the OP takes annual leave 1 day pw her colleagues will need to cover her anyway so I don't see why they can't accommodate until she has childcare provision.

99ProblemsPlus1

That’s not what I’m saying but okay.

Nurseries are reopening in June, childminders can already open. You are being treated equally, it's not discrimination
This. Did you enquire when the nursery is due to reopen. Have you contacted any local childminders? Any other nurseries?

Or is it that you don't want them to be looked by someone else?

You've had special treatment because you have a young child.
Your childcare isn't the issue o your employer. Does your husband really work 7 days a week?

I would not be happy being required to use my Annual leave in this situation because this means ultimately that you won't be able to get a proper break in due course

What people don't seem to be accepting is that this is happening to TONNES of people right now. I know lots of people who's work places are saying they have to take some AL now so they aren't all taking it later in the year. This really isn't unique to the OP.

It actually sounds as they’ve been really accommodating to you. YABU

It's exactly what you're saying. You want to keep your AL and also not go into the office which is what your employer is asking you to do that day, not work from home.

From what you have described, it was actually everyone else that was being discriminated against and now your up in arms that you are all getting the same treatment.
It is a difficult situation but your employers have been more than fair

I would not be happy being required to use my Annual leave in this situation because this means ultimately that you won't be able to get a proper break in due course.

Millions upon millions of people are having to adapt, juggle, use holiday, work at night etc in order to get through at the moment. It’s not ideal but we need to manage somehow. Not getting “a proper break” later down the line is something most of us are having to live with due to the situation and I think it would be a bit rubbish to refuse to be a little accommodating (taking leave to look after your own child) for this reason.