To ask for your help to unf@#£k my house?

[Boredbumhead]

4 bed old farmhouse in a rural location. I love it. We have a dog and chickens, 2 kids and a rather slapdash dp.

Really the whole thing needs a repaint and new carpets but am on a budget and working full time so little time to do it. I've just spent a whole morning just cleaning the utility room. Buckets of murky water (dog sleeps in there).

Previous family were just an elderly couple and had cream carpets everywhere which have just been wrecked. By kids, do and dog.

I don't know but it never feels clean no matter how hard I scrub. I feel dp doesn't see mess or dirt.

AIBU to ask for tips, help and advice please? Feeling totally moody and overwhelmed (made worse by PMT.)

Never get the time to play with the kids as the house always needs unf@#£ing.

Perhaps I should just lower my standards and live in sh@t?

Eh???

This is a site for adults. We're allowed to swear.

You can swear

For interior ideas you can always browse Instagram and Pinterest. It sounds like your house has a lot of potential.

Pull the carpets up, sand and seal the floorboards, get some rugs.

He'll yeah. I'm a parent of young kids. I need to let off steam somehow.

Until you can replace the carpets, focus on washing down the walls, skirtings, doors etc. If you can, sometimes even just lifting the carpets and hoovering/washing the bare floorboards and making do with a big rug makes a huge difference to the feel of cleanliness.

Yes, I agree it's difficult, I have tried to make it easier to get things done (and clean) too. 2 years ago when we moved house I de-cluttered everything - loads of stuff to ebay, recylcing, charity and waste site this has really helped. Now nothing comes in the house unless it has a place to go if new or if replacing something.Everything has a home and I make sure we all put things back. All this means less clutter so easier to clean as no tidying beforehand. DSs both have to do their own rooms and bathrooms. If I get behind I send everything to the laundry for the week, if I need to I book a cleaner to blitz it. I work around the house in jobs of 10 mins each say 3 times a week on top of the usual housework (clean a cupboard, go through a wardrobe). We have stayed on top of it by being ruthless and I feel much better about it. I'm also a massive Marie Kondo fan and try to follow her ways. I don't know if that helps or not!

Yes, it is a site for adults. And therefore OP can speak exactly as she sees fit! As adults we have the choice to choose the language which we wish, or don't wish, to use.

Look at trashed House as sign of Happy, relaxed family and kids having a wonderful childhood.
Hire a carpet cleaner from your nearest big supermarket. Won't last long.
Shout out on your local fb group for some rugs or runners for high traffic areas. Cheap or free.
Big tub of white or cream own brand paint from B&Q, wickes, homebase etc. Freshen up the walls. Save choosing colour until kids are teenagers.
Flowers.

I don’t think there are any easy solutions. I live in a small terrace house with just one teen DC and a cat and was just thinking this morning how much effort it takes to keep a house clean and tidy. There is always washing to do and put away, the kitchen needs daily attention even if you have a dishwasher, etc etc. I don’t think carpets really work anywhere (except perhaps upstairs bedrooms in houses where people take their shoes off). And keep clutter to a minimum.

What I would say is that in your situation I would avoid having carpets and choose some floor coverings that are easy to clean.

Hmm I'm not a carpet fan because they get ruined. What kind of floors do you have underneath? I have a long term plan for a robot hoover/floor cleaner but cant afford it yet.

Be realistic - you live in a family home with kids and dogs. It's never going to look like a show home and would you even want it to?

Having said that, either less stuff or places to put it that you can shut or put a lid on to reduce dust does make a difference, plus systems like hard floors so you just sweep and mop. Even then, it's always going to need doing more often than it gets your believe.

What areas bother you most? My life improved hugely when I got a big coat rack made - 12 hooks on a big sheet of tongue and groove, with a shelf above it. Finally I could organise the coats,bags, gloves and bike helmets so they were off the floor. There were only 3 of us so you probably need 24 hooks! Means I dont have that awful 'oh God' feeling when i come in.

Start by decluttering - it’s easier to clean if you’re not packed to the rafters with shit.

Then go one room at a time but have a plan.

Organise the shit, clean properly, repaint/repair etc as necessary.

On to the next room.

Then you can either clean or replace the carpets.

If you do have nice woooden floors underneath definitely rip the carpets up.

Do it room by room though and make sure every has a place. I’ve transformed my house doing this.

I detest housework but I grew up in a horrible house and don’t want my children going through the same.

Bit by bit and have a plan.

The laundry used to kill me. On a Facebook group someone suggested the following for laundry and it sorted me out.

3 baskets in a communal area - darks, whites and colours with labels.

Each basket is a load’s worth. Check each morning and do the one that’s most full.

I used to have baskets in each bedroom, one for bed stuff etc and the sorting took too much time.

Piece of piss now.

Have a boot room or porch and use it well. Wet coats/boots/dogs have to remain in there until dry and no outdoor shoes in the house.

Do you do all the cleaning/tidying etc? What does DH do?

Get rid of the cream carpets. You have dogs and children. If you get replacement carpets, get a colour with a fleck in it.
Get rugs that can go in the washing machine.

You have children, so there will be mess. It's ok.

Have a place for everything so that if it's still messy, you know where things are.

You can get all sort of stuff off freebie sites like freegle and freecycle.

There is a facebook group called DIY on a budget which is really handy for getting advice and inspiration.

Echo Mamia15: where is your partner in this?

get rid of carpets. Even if you have to buy cheap lino instead, it still a lot more practical and doesn't look worst than grotty carpets.

I would spend you money on a lot of white paint to brighten and professional carpet cleaning. Go round room by room and tear them apart. Make lists of what you need to fix in each room. It won't happen quickly but say if you did a room per month.
I've seen professional carpets cleaners rescue the most crazy dirty carpets.

"This is a site for adults. We're allowed to swear." What's the attitude for? Just as in real life, people have the choice over whether they want to swear or not. Op chose not to type the word, it's up to her. FFS (I added that because I thought people might enjoy picking holes in that as well).

If you're going to repaint, I'd get coloured walls rather than white/neutral, much better for dirty little hands. Make sure you get a washable one to use in busy areas.
Carpets/rugs with a fleck or pattern are a good idea.
Keep decluttering regulalry.
My top tip - things need to be easier to put away than to get out. So think about how you are going to store things - children's things need to be within their reach, and they need to be trained to put things away before getting the next lot of things out.

Given what you’ve said I’d avoid carpets in rooms where you can. Personally I like Carpets in bedrooms but all other rooms go for laminate, vinyl, LVT or hardwood as mentioned by others. There are a lot of options but you’ll probably find vinyl/lino the cheapest. Just watch if you go for a cushioned one there’s no risk heals, claws etc will puncture if. I would avoid tiles as you’ll be always scrubbing in the grout and unless you have underfloor heating in a house as you’ve described, they’ll be really cold underfoot.

Painting go for a paint that has some resistance. Do your research. You can get bathroom and kitchen paints amongst others which offer some water/splash protection and can be wiped.

And finally, can you enlist the kids to help you keep on top of things a bit? Obviously not Oliver Twist style but Encourage them to take some responsibility for tidying their toys for example?

Best of luck!!

When I don't have a toddler (and therefore want to spend the time he is asleep either collapsed on the bed or on the sofa with a glass of wine and a book) I'm going to loosely adopt the Organised Mum Method. It's 30 minutes a day.

www.theorganisedmum.blog/

However it sounds like you need a decent base level of cleanliness to start from. I second going room to room, decluttering, painting, and seeing if there are decent floorboards under the carpets.

If the kids are old enough, train them on bathrooms and bed-making.

Sympathies, I also have an OH who doesn't see dirt, very frustrating.

I second everyone who says take up carpets. Especially in hall/stairs/kitchen?/dining room etc. Sand floors so they're easy to sweep/wash if necessary. Put big rugs in living room. Put throws over sofas/chairs if they get messy often, easy to throw in washing machine.