To ask for your help to unf@#£k my house?

[Boredbumhead]

4 bed old farmhouse in a rural location. I love it. We have a dog and chickens, 2 kids and a rather slapdash dp.

Really the whole thing needs a repaint and new carpets but am on a budget and working full time so little time to do it. I've just spent a whole morning just cleaning the utility room. Buckets of murky water (dog sleeps in there).

Previous family were just an elderly couple and had cream carpets everywhere which have just been wrecked. By kids, do and dog.

I don't know but it never feels clean no matter how hard I scrub. I feel dp doesn't see mess or dirt.

AIBU to ask for tips, help and advice please? Feeling totally moody and overwhelmed (made worse by PMT.)

Never get the time to play with the kids as the house always needs unf@#£ing.

Perhaps I should just lower my standards and live in sh@t?

[Disfordarkchocolate]

Drawers!

[rillette]

Mrs Hinch! Ha!

Don't worry about the mess OP, just spray some Zoflora about the place and stick half a bottle of Pine Harpic down your toilet

[QualityFeet]

Floor boards and flags and robot mop = heaven

[ivykaty44]

stick some pictures up and we can give suggestions. Looking at your own room with different eyes of strangers often helps you to make it look good.

[willowmelangell]

Bin the carpet from the room with most traffic, Hall?
No outdoor shoes beyond doorway. Tubs or baskets or shelves for outdoor shoes near front and back door. Space for slippers or house shoes available.
Start small. Insist on compliance. Hand out vacuum/mop/brush for slackers and mud trackers.

[BMW6]

I agree with the suggestion to get rid of all the carpet on the ground floor.

[billy1966]

Get rid of carpet.
Whats wrong with throwing good clean washable lino down everywhere.

My sports club put a white/grey wooden board affect lino down in the club house and we couldn't believe how well it looked.

Simple to keep clean, so forgiving.

White wash, washable paint everywhere.

Loads of cheap hooks for coats in back hall.

Rows of shelving made with cheap wood slats to make shoe shelves.

Clear out as much as you can.
Get the kids to help.

The less clutter the easier the house is to run.

Hope that helps.

👍

[bumblingbovine49]

I find that the floor is really important in how clean a room looks. Clean floor makes it feel clean even if the surfaces are a tiny bit grubby. Grubby floor and no matter how clean the surfaces and walls are the room still feels grubby

Sort out the cream carpets first. Maybe replace them or see what is underneath . Then go from there

[Boredbumhead]

Thanks really helpful, you've all cheered me up no end. Putting pics up might be identifying, but the worst offender is a cream carpet on the stairs.... Would pained stairs be any good?

[billy1966]

Painted stairs would be fine......it's the noise that might be a killer....

Kids thumping up and down it 100 times a day....within a week you would be praying for the old carpet back.....remove with caution👍

[Boredbumhead]

Yeah true. I have a real allergy to noises like doors slamming, cupboards closing, so perhaps a stairs without a covering would be a nightmare. Perhaps replace with dark carpet and a strict no shoes policy

[LadyRoughDiamond]

I'd go with a narrow stripe stair carpet - much more forgiving. Light will show dirt, dark will show fluff.

[Winterwoollies]

Sorry op, I read the last bit as ‘live in shat’ and it’s given me the giggles.

[Teabaseddiet]

On the stairs you could have a dark or hard wearing (hessian?) carpet.
Where painting is needed, can you just touch it up for the moment? Get a small tin of paint or sampler pot so it's not a huge job.

De clutter and get more storage so everything has its space.

Get the kids/partner to do specific jobs so it's not all down to you.

[JassyRadlett]

Another vote for a thin stripe carpet - we have it on our stairs and landings and it’s an absolute lifesaver. The cream carpet in the bedrooms on the other hand.... 😱

[ChikiTIKI]

Tile floors and a steam cleaner mop thing for the kitchen will look really clean.

Some good advice on here which has been an interesting read. The problem in my house is too much stuff, not enough storage. Children's toys and books. Working on it though.

[ChikiTIKI]

I have narrow stripe carpet in my hallway/stairs and don't like it. Was there when we moved in. I was planning to change it to a dark neutral multi tone type carpet... Wondering if this is a bad idea now. We are a no shoes house but sometimes nip upstairs with shoes on when about to leave the house (always up and down at least 6 times while getting ready and then once about to leave I've always forgotten something...)

[Packamack]

I don't know but it never feels clean no matter how hard I scrub. I feel dp doesn't see mess or dirt

It's feminism you need, not cleaning tips.

Who made you the fucking skivvy?

[ivykaty44]

Painted stairs can look lovely, but remember that depending on where the stairs are they could be very noisy in other rooms. The paint will wear, obviously don’t use silk gloss as you’ll be slipping

[ChristmasFluff]

As others have said, I'd gradually get rid of the carpet completely. Even cheap laminate is better than manky carpet, but I bet you've got some decent flooring under there.

Also the hessian on the stairs is a great idea. Kids can be cumpy on stairs anyway, so I would say that is the one place where some form of carpet, even if only a runner, is essential.

Clean floors will make the whole place look entirely different

[gamerchick]

Perhaps replace with dark carpet and a strict no shoes policy

I have a no shoes policy for upstairs but you have to be a bit militant to enforce it. If your bloke, despite the cute terms you're using to describe him, is as bad as you say he is, will he actually take any notice?

I'd definitely get rid of any carpet downstairs and have a come to Jesus talk with your husband about this laziness dressed up as doesn't see dirt. There's nothing stopping him doing a list regularly whether he sees dirt or not.

This isn't fair on you, plus kids are able to learn how to do their part.