To ask for your help to unf@#£k my house?

[Boredbumhead]

4 bed old farmhouse in a rural location. I love it. We have a dog and chickens, 2 kids and a rather slapdash dp.

Really the whole thing needs a repaint and new carpets but am on a budget and working full time so little time to do it. I've just spent a whole morning just cleaning the utility room. Buckets of murky water (dog sleeps in there).

Previous family were just an elderly couple and had cream carpets everywhere which have just been wrecked. By kids, do and dog.

I don't know but it never feels clean no matter how hard I scrub. I feel dp doesn't see mess or dirt.

AIBU to ask for tips, help and advice please? Feeling totally moody and overwhelmed (made worse by PMT.)

Never get the time to play with the kids as the house always needs unf@#£ing.

Perhaps I should just lower my standards and live in sh@t?

[SusieOwl4]

Firstly do you rent or own ? Because that might dictate what you can do .

[enjoyingSun]

Declutter, buy storage and get rid of carpets and replace with something that is washable and get a steam mop or spray mop - so its' quicke to wash down.

Longer term -think about fitting/setting up a mud room - a room/ area directly from outside to dump muddy coats/shoes and if possible with a sink.

[TwentyViginti]

Is it only you doing all the cleaning and tidying?

[Puds11]

What’s under the carpets? If it’s an old farmhouse there may be flagstones. Where possible downstairs I’d strip back to either stone or wood, much easier upkeep. Get some rugs from Gumtree or the likes.

Upstairs I’d have carpets but maybe go for a grey rather than cream?

How old are the children? Get them to clean their own rooms and tidy away their things from any communal space if old enough to do so.

Maybe keep the dog downstairs only?

[Puds11]

Long term think about getting a helpful DP

[ohlookthisisjustdaftnow]

How old are the children?

If I were you I'd concentrate on the kitchen, the bathroom(s) and communal hallways. At least if they are clean, then it matters less about everywhere else.

Have a big basket in the corner of each room, preferably hidden by some piece of furniture. Into it goes everything that is left lying about. Just doing that every couple of days will at least give a semblance of superficial tidiness.

You have my sympathies - we have a small house with 4 untidy adults in it, and far too many possessions crammed in as a result of dc returning home to live with us again. It was supposed to be temporary, but now it looks like it will be for longer than expected. Their dp came to stay before lockdown and is still here as well (with all their possessions).

[PermanentTemporary]

Ooh lino or vinyl is a good shout.

[fedupandlookingforchange]

Don't expose the flagstones! Old flagstones are a nightmare to get clean then keep clean, even when they are sealed (and some say they shouldn't be sealed).
I have similar problems and have found keeping dogs only in kitchen and utility, no shoes in the house (take them off in the porch), brown speckled polypropylene carpets as they can be easily shampooed and a cleaner once a week.

[Teaandbiscuitsallday]

Mrs hinch has loads of tips , Mrs hinch facebook groups are good. People help each other out.

[yesiamgoingtoeatthat]

Would you really all prefer hardwood / stone floor to carpet, or is that purely to manage dirt in a busy house? I would like wooden floors but think it would be so cold... I have very high ceilings though. I'd love to hear any advice on that.

[callmeadoctor]

Yep, agree with ditch downstairs carpets if you can, maybe try and keep one room unused in the day so that you at least have one clean tidy room to relax in and feel a bit better? I have all tiles downstairs and use a steamer once a day because of the dog, that feels much cleaner.

[callmeadoctor]

Oh and get a steamer for the hard floors anyway, they are FAB!

[WellTidy]

Get the carpets cleaned (rooms will need to be clear for this, so maybe just do a couple of rooms at a time) - we bought a vacuum carpet cleaner so that we could do ours over a few weeks as we are working and have children too. Paint the walls in a scrubbable paint. Keep a basket in each room and put anything that doesn’t belong in that room in the basket, and the carry the basket round putting everything back in its own room.

Have less stuff (I am still working on this). When you only gave what you’re intending to keep, buy storage.

The tip about a triple laundry sorted upthread changed my laundry routine hugely. The key is only to wash when a bag is full. And then on other days do towels and bedding.

[DappledThings]

Just as in real life, people have the choice over whether they want to swear or not. Op chose not to type the word

Random asterisks is neither swearing or not. It's twee pretending to swear but being coy about it. Say fuck if you want, don't if you don't but don't be silly and say f@!k. It's silly.

[Disfordarkchocolate]

Chuck stuff out.

Invest in hard flooring, even lino with washable rugs is better than carpet.

Think about storage everytime you shop. So, if you buy a footstool you buy one with storage. You buy a bed, get one with strong draws.

And tell your husband to grow up.

Give everyone jobs and make it mandatory. Husband and children all need to step up. Your not the only adult.

Good luck.

[MikeUniformMike]

I came back on to ask if there was any reason why DP wasn't helping you with the cleaning. Sorry if helping seems an odd word but if he doesn't see the mess, you need to get him on board, and get him to do tasks daily. Some people need to be reminded.

Split tasks into daily, weekly, monthly, twice a year, once a year jobs.

Painting doesn't take that long - you need daylight and the kids and pets out of the way. Paint doesn't have to be expensive, but get tough, washable paint for areas of high usage.

[MacavityTheDentistsCat]

I took OP's use of special characters to be because she wanted her title to echo the Unf*ck your Habitat book/website.

[Pleasenodont]

Cream carpets are bloody awful, total nightmare especially with pets and children. I’d lift them personally if the floorboards are in good nick underneath and probably sand and varnish the floorboards.

[callmeadoctor]

The OP can use what she wants in her title, we aren't the word police!!!

[Healthyandhappy]

RIP carpets up get a decorator and pay on finance for carpets

[Oliversmumsarmy]

I hate carpets. They are dirt magnets that need so much upkeep

Take up the carpet and see what’s underneath with any luck it could be flagstones or a lovely wooden floor.

[Healthyandhappy]

Cant be any worse than my playroom. I have paint on floor from few years ago and it's never tidy

[LadyRoughDiamond]

We're also rural - do think about getting rid of carpets on the ground floor. I spend half the year battling mud, leaves, weird sticks that the kids have found, it would be a lost cause if we had carpets. Seriously, sand, seal, varnish or polish and, if you have the odd rarely-used room, paint the floor, then just have a few PATTERNED rugs. From there, just take it one room at a time. Perhaps paint less-used rooms yourself and save up to get the ones you're in all the time done by a local decorator- they'll be quicker and cleaner if we're anything to go by. Seriously, you can do this.

[XingMing]

Sugar soap to clean the walls, then paint them Eygyptian Cotton. It's neutral and changes colour with light. It's not white, but light, and it's forgiving of slack cleaning and dirty dogs. Investigate, carefully, what's under the cream carpet. If flagstones, I don't know, but a friend had slate floors in an old farmhouse and the floor was slightly cambered into a drain, so she ran water across it and gave it a quick scrub most mornings just before walking the dog and came back to a clean dry floor. If it's not stone or wood, look at Karndean for the high traffic areas. Mine's been down almost 20 years and still looks decent; it's easy to brush/hoover and mop but the initial cost is quite high. It's only worth it if you are staying put for a long time. No help on training kids to tidy... that's still work in progress here.

[DelphiniumBlue]

Yes, well, my training kids tip was with hindsight, not what I actually did!
When my children were small, I was an amateur. Now I teach in Primary school and realise what they can actually do when trained!