Best CF Stories

[CupcakesAndCastles]

Lockdown sucks, what’s the best CF stories you’ve read?

[YouTheCat]

Holy crap! That is beyond CF.

[Toucantweet]

A friend was attending a wedding in a popular touristy area where my parents have a holiday home.
Booked one night ( night of the wedding) at a hotel but it was extortionate. I offered her the use of the house ( for free) and she gratefully accepted. Wedding was on a Thursday. Asked if she could stay the Wednesday night too. No problem.
Rang on the Friday, she was having a lovely time so thought they would stay the weekend. Was not best chuffed but let it slide.
Dropped the keys back on the Monday whilst I was at work with a list of things that had ‘run out’ during their stay. This included the wine, whisky, tinned goods........... they had helped themselves to the contents of the cupboards.
Was hacked off but wrote it off to experience.
Three weeks later, I was contacted on Facebook by one of her friends. They had really enjoyed their stay at the cottage and wanted to book it for a week in the school holidays - would it be the same price?
The cheeky sod had invited two other couples to also stay and charged them !!
She is now an ex friend

[Joan0fSarc]

When my best friend got married she gave all her closest friends tasks to complete for her big day. Mine was to make 300 place cards - each had the bride & groom's name written on them and had a complicated fiddly little sequin piece of crap that needed to be sewn on. I also had to do all the stuff with the venue which was in my town (bride had moved away but was coming home for her wedding). So lots of phone calls, going into town to sort stuff, getting there early on the day to set things up, tidy away after etc.

Friend and her fiancee were very comfortably off but decided that they didn't want to pay for 'everyone else to party' and as such charged each guest £50 for the privilege of attending. They sent out invitations in the form of a photocopied letter with a tear-off strip at the bottom, like you get for a school trip. You had to post it back with your 'remittance' (this was 2005 so you had to send a cheque). Guests had to say how many were attending and pay whatever it came to. No discount for children, either, but if you were lucky enough to have been one of those who'd been given a task you got a £10 discount as a thank you. Friend also put in the letter something along the lines of 'while we feel it only fair to ask you to contribute to our special day so we can all enjoy making memories together you are also invited to view our wedding list at John Lewis - we can't wait to see what you've chosen for us to start our new lives with' (they'd been living together for five years at this point).

After the ceremony we all sat down for the wedding breakfast. I had brought DD who was three at the time - me and DH were pretty hard up and we couldn't afford for him to come too. When we were shown to our seats there wasn't one for DD because I hadn't been able to pay for her, either. Friend shouted across from the top table 'you'll have to put her on your knee'. The food was served and I had to eat it with DD on my knee, but she didn't have any food because I hadn't paid for her. A waiter took pity on her and snuck her some bread rolls and a piece of cake when friend wasn't looking.

We didn't stay friends for too long after that. She'd always been a CF but that was the last straw. I did hear through the grapevine that she got divorced and remarried a few years back and did the same, only this time she asked for guests to pay for the honeymoon too 😂

[merryhouse]

I'm sorry - what? THREE HUNDRED PEOPLE agreed to pay £50 to attend somebody else's wedding?

I mean, I'm always flabbergasted when people talk about charging for a private party - I wouldn't bother going to a baby shower at £35, or a christening for £75 - but seriously, all those people just went "yeah, sounds fair"?

[Tunnocks34]

Currently my SIL. Feel like this needs a bit of background but basically MIL has learning difficulties - she went to a special school etc so these aren’t just minor. Her marriage to (deceased) FIL was arranged by her parents to basically get rid of her. Anyway, when OH was 14, he had anger issues and she was struggling to cope, and so she sent him to live with rich relatives 250 miles away. These relatives basically put my OH in private school, paid for him to go to university etc whilst SIL didn’t have these opportunities and became a carer for MIL and basically failed her GCSEs.

Fast forward to now. OH has a degree, masters and we’re doing ok. SIL, lives in a two bed council house with MIL and her daughter.

We have paid for DN nursery fees since she was 1 (she’s at school now so we no longer do this) as SIL wanted to return to college and get qualifications (she has never done this). She has worked cash in hand as a hairdresser for a whille, and now because the hair dresser is shut, apparent OH and I should be offering to pay her an allowance until she’s back on her feet, we have refused and now she’s not speaking to us for being ‘selfish’. Apparently we should at least give her the money we’re saving on her daughters ballet lessons and swimming lessons (which we pay for) as they are cancelled.

[rosegoldivy]

Placemarking :) I love these threads

[Joan0fSarc]

@merryhouse almost without exception, yes they did. Even the bride and groom's respective parents!

[CrazyTimesAreOccurring]

I love these threads too, but they give me the rage when there's no comeuppance 😁, I am too invested!

[looselegs]

My SIL is a CF.
My mum was at the local shopping centre, getting her nails done. SIL happened to see her in the nail bar and went in to say hello. She had her daughter with her. She asked Mum if she wanted any shopping doing while she was having her nails done. Mum wanted about 4 small items from the supermarket and gave SIL a £20 note to pay for it. The items would have cost less than a fiver, but mum didn't have any smaller notes.
Anyway, SIL and her daughter were gone for ages- Mum had finished having her nails done and was waiting for them to come back. When they eventually rocked up, they handed Mum her shopping and mum put her hand out for the change- only to be told that there was any because her and her daughter had bought themselves a cooked breakfast each at the café! They saw it as their 'reward' for getting her 4 items of shopping for her! She then offered Mum a lift home so she wouldn't have to wait for a taxi, then, once they got home she asked Mum for the petrol money because she would have had to pay the taxi driver anyway! Luckily Mum was quick off the mark and told her she hadn't got anymore cash because they'd bought breakfast with it.
So SIL asked her for it the next time she saw her! Mum told her to do one and never asked her to help out or took her up on any offers of a lift etc again.

[StartingGrid]

@cleanasawhistle your thread really reminded me of one last summer/autumn where a woman took her DD to a club weekly, and the mother of a girl who wasn't even nice to her DD expected OP to drive to her every week early to get them for a lift, despite it messing up her kids dinner routine...
When OP said you will have to bring kid to me and we go from mine, CF went garrity at her! Ended up rather than walk 10 mins to OP, or even pay for a cab for 5 mins for her DD to OP, she made a point of getting cabs all the way and got her DD to give OP's a hard time at school because of it! Wonder if it was the same woman

[Clearthinking]

When bil got married mil wanted to offer our spare rooms out to random family members from out of town, for a few days to save them hotel money. When we got married asked if we could have a buffett so they could invite more people, venue booked and only held 40. Offered to come on honeymoon with us as there is room for 4 people and the extra room would have gone to waste. Often used to find our where we were planning on going on hols, finding out how many it would hold and suggested we fill the space by inviting them or bil/sil. Nevermind I have family I might liked to ask!

[looselegs]

I also had neighbours who let kids who were visiting use the toys in my garden.
I work as a childminder. NDN had no children of their own. While we were away on holiday they had a friend and her 2 children staying, and also had a big BBQ for friends and family. We came back a day early from holiday to discover that one of the fence panels had been taken out between the gardens. Not only had they let all the visiting kids and those at the BBQ play on the outside toys , including the sand pit which they'd left the lid off and it had rained, they'd also let their dog shit all over the garden

[looselegs]

Also, because I work as a childminder, I do school runs to the local primary school. Had a random woman come up to me one day and TOLD me that I needed to pick her daughter up from the nursery that afternoon because she was having her nails done and didn't think she'd be back in time! Also had a random guy come up to me and asked me to stop at his house on the way home and pick his child up and look after her because she was sick,and he couldn't look after her because he had to go to work!

[ProseccoBubbleFantasies]

What did you say about the garden @looselegs?

[scrambledtofu]

I had a thread a couple of years ago but name change regularly so can't remember the one when I posted it BUT ...
a few years ago I was planning DD's birthday. I knew that another classmates birthday was close, so I checked with the mum before we made the arrangements and sent out invitations to make sure they didn't clash. All ok.

36 hours before the party (we hire village hall, do crafts, play games and invite all classmates and friends, so usually about 35 kids, plus my parents fly in to help. There is a lot of effort goes into these parties and the kids love them) she asked me to delay my party by half an hour because 4 of our guests would be leaving her party early, and the birthday package had cost her a lot of money.

So I agreed, that I could delay the big activities until they arrived, Not a big deal. (I did think it was a bit bad form of guests parents, but not my circus).

But she replied, saying actually that wasn't enough time and that I should delay it by minimum an hour. And reiterated that she had paid a lot of money for her party.

Clearly her hired package party for 8 kids was much more important than all of the materials we had bought, food we had cooked, time and effort we had put in.

So when I made it very clear that I was not going to spend my afternoon (the day before the party) contacting many parents to rearrange everything, whilst taking care of my baby and toddler, doing last minute prep and collecting my parents from the airport for their visit, she took a bit of a huff.

We haven't spoken since.

[Lorddenning1]

More please :)
mine are minor compared to some of these, i have given my sister things in the past, baby items and she has gone on to sell them soon after, when i question her she says she no longer needed them. i could of sold them myself but as its family, you dont ask for money for items they say they need.
My older sis is quite entitled to, expects my parents to look after her children, and when they book holidays, goes mad because she has to book time off work to look after her own children, never mined that she gets free childcare for all 4 of her children. My parents are retired and should be able to book holidays and enjoy their lives, to be fair they have allowed her to be like this, so its their own fault.

[CrazyTimesAreOccurring]

@scrambledtofu I think I remember that thread! Wow, to think someone would actually have the gall to ask that

[Andpopwenttheweasle]

A lady I worked with, for several years. Her fiance worked with me for many more than her (they then met in work). I was really good friends with him. I joined slimming world with her at a venue near work when she got engaged. As her wedding approached it became clear she had no firends or anyone to help her. My best friend started working at the same place and so met her too.
Between my best friend and I we went dress shopping with her, helped pick colour scheme /flowers etc, hand made invites with her, made place cards(with a trivia game on them), we made her 5 tier wedding cake as a gift (my bestie and I sell cakes on the side).
We plan and run her hen do, the guests are her mum and the ladies from our team in work, dinner, strip and drag show, themed pub crawl-the works.
5 days before the wedding she hasn't sorted favours or table centres. We made the table centres and sorted favours, this ended up in her hotel room the night before til 10pm tying ribbon on bags of Welsh cakes! Day of the wedding I do her make up for free, dress her. My bestie and I run the behind the scenes of the wedding, bestie does the wedding photography for free with her sister helping, time for dinner and speaches....
She gushes over her perfect day, Thanks her bridesmaids for everything they've done for her (hubby's teenage neices who only picked their dress up on the day and walked down the aisle), thanks her mum and dad, best man, catered, venue, her brothers, produces gifts for bridesmaids and best man... and sits down again.
If her gob smacked husband haddnt stood straight up and listed most of the above before leading a round of applause for my bestie and I, we would have walked out right then!
About 4 months later she took my bestie and I, and her bridesmaids out for a pub dinner to say thank you! I wonder why I don't speak her anymore?!?

[CrazyTimesAreOccurring]

Unbelievable @Andpopwenttheweasle!!! These stories are incredible! Mine pales into insignificance - but a wedding one too. A guy my family and I were brought up with got married a few years ago. I ended up in the kitchen at the wedding helping out, didnt mind, but at the end of the wedding everyone else left me and about 5 other mugs cleaning up. Were there till midnight. I took a load of their tat home, plus the wedding cake to look after. Just about got a thanks a month later when they collected it and stuff that people had left at the wedding hall.
Last year they then had a do to thank the people that helped at the wedding, getting others to bring all the food again - guess who AGAIN ended up in the kitchen (this time they had rota ed people but NOT themselves) so all had a good time thanking the people that helped, apart from the people that helped again..... My mum (he regards as his foster mum he says) had a stroke that night (not connected)and not once have they even contacted me to ask how she is. Strange people, get away with being takers.

What did you say to him @Shuttup?

[SnagAndChips]

Not as splendid as some of these but...
the mum of one of DD1's friends was trying to get back into the workforce, after being at home with kids.

To help her I agreed to look after her daughter after school. One day she turned up to collect her DD, with no son.
Where is your DS ? I asked.
Ah he was sick so his dad picked him up from school at lunchtime.

So why the heck did dad not collect daughter from school rather than put me out to fetch , entertain and feed her?
I realised I was being taken for a mug, stopped looking after her- have seen the mum 3 times in 4 years, although at one point I was a' close friend'. Ha

[cleanasawhistle]

@StartingGrid......I remember tht one .The other mother was all this isnt on etc.
The thing with my friend was I never offered in the first place.
I used to say to my friends my husband and kids know how much I love my hobby and they know not to arrange anything because I will not be changing my plans that night.
She hasnt directly mentioned her text or my reply but within a group of us she has dropped hints about no being able to get her child to the group.I just ignor

[Clancey]

When mom sold up & moved into a smaller place bro was furious. Then when she dared buy herself aaaaall new furniture, he was calling everyone up in disbelief. How very dare she spend her own money! Of course when she actually got herself a funeral plan he was beeesssiiiiiide himself. She said that she didn't want anyone to have to foot the bill for this when she was gone, plus he was never the most honest so she feared he'd give her a state funeral & pocket the money. So when mom died everything was paid for & there was plenty left for a really decent wake ... Only the very best for my mom I thought. What a shocker when the wake was held in a filthy, derelict looking old pub, there was nothing to drink, a few mouldy old sandwiches, & hardly anyone was invited, well, not anyone who mattered to mom anyway. I think we all felt a bit sorry for him as he'd never amounted to much in life. He's lived his life fiddling his benefits, yet criticises those who are out of work. Do not get him started on those that are in work but do not do their jobs properly either! Finally he moaned at the funeral that mom had the most expensive funeral plan. How very selfish of mom to struggle for much of her life, rather than her entire life so that greedy CF could help himself to her money. I'm just surprised that he's not still drawing her pension 🤔

[TinRoofRusty]

Lift and childcare CFers are legion.

Similar to Shuttup I've been invited to a party and then expected to act as a server. I've always had Resting Bitch Face, though, so put that on and walked out.

Had a few first dates who tried to pull the forgot my wallet stunt. That doesn't work on me, either. Always for full meals (I soon learned never to meet up for the first time for a full meal) where they'd ordered up a lot. Nice try, CFer. Never once paid up for them. They were all shocked. CFers rely on people being too shocked or polite not to tell them no. Forgot your wallet, my arse, funny how they all remembered their phones and keys. 'Phone a friend' was my response, got up, paid my bill and left.

[looselegs]

@ProseccoBubbleFantasies they were woken the next morning by hubby hammering small pieces of wood onto the ends of the fence panel with nails so it couldn't be taken out again! Nothing needed to be said!