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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

People who aren’t quite getting it...

418 replies

MadameBee · 08/05/2020 12:44

I wouldn’t comment IRL and am not part of the Stasi post on FB with “reported to police” written in capitals which I am quietly finding quite amusing.

But a few people are posting are posting stuff on SM with “and before you judge me XYZ”

Friend who posted last weekend “having a bonfire this afternoon so just letting all my neighbours on here no so you can shut your windows” erm - you aren’t supposed to be having bonfires because of the risk of added pressure on the emergency services if something goes wrong, everyone is cooped up inside and it’s foul and some of those people might be shielding because of impaired lung capacity.

Photos of children on a bouncy castle in the back yard, “before you judge me there was no contact and the guy cleaned it all” yes but the point is it’s not exactly an essential fucking journey is it?!

And the people moaning about traffic on the roads - erm you were there too but your reason is “justified” because you are a key worker? “The park/beach was so crowded” so I came home - BUT YOU WERE THERE TOO!!!!

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sweetkitty · 08/05/2020 19:27

My SIL has annoyed me and I know I shouldn’t let it get to me. She’s been posting on FB about her daily walks which she’s been driving 10-20 miles to go to. Then it was her grand-daughters birthday, her daughter has asthma and is shielding. We said oh that’s a shame you can’t give her a birthday hug and she said I know then she put the same sort of thing on FB. Her other daughter then posts a video on snapchat of the two of them inside the house watching her blow out her candles so she’s basically lied. This daughter has also been going out walks with her BF she doesn’t live with.

My dad who is 65 and smokes like a chimney and has dodgy lungs at the best of times was away putting a shower in for someone and is driving 7 miles to go for a walk with my brother (social distancing of course)

My aunt and uncle in their 70s were telling me about not going out and getting their shopping delivered, then they tell me they were at a gender reveal party in their grand-daughters house.

So many stories like this, people just not getting it. I’m grumpy as I’m dying to get in the car and drive to the beach.

Tfoot75 · 08/05/2020 19:30

Obviously no one has been given the right to decide whether or not the NHS is under pressure and all journeys that are not essential should be taken. That was the law that was passed 7 weeks ago when we thought there was a real chance that the health service would be overwhelmed and the message really mattered.

However, things have changed, it never happened, we are told day after day that admissions are decreasing, A&E attendance is lower than ever. We're free to have a bit of common sense and not blindly follow laws that have absolutely no impact now. I know I'm not going to be fined for going to b&m for craft items (as I did last week) or B&q for a fucking chiminea or whatever. Nothing has changed in law but the situation has completely changed.

I just don't understand why anyone is still trotting out the essential journey nonsense.

Amatteroftime · 08/05/2020 19:30

And the people moaning about traffic on the roads - erm you were there too but your reason is “justified” because you are a key worker? “The park/beach was so crowded” so I came home - BUT YOU WERE THERE TOO!!!!

Are you saying key workers shouldn't be on the roads?

And beaches/parks are usually crowded with picnickers whilst I'm walking the dog. I'm allowed to be doing that, they are not. The moaning is justified.

Amatteroftime · 08/05/2020 19:32

Although in honesty I see no problems with people chatting to relatives if dropping shopping off to them, staying in a garden or drive and remaining 2 meters apart at all times. It is no different to talking to your neighbour over a fence.

Ethelfleda · 08/05/2020 19:40

I just don't understand why anyone is still trotting out the essential journey nonsense

Because this is still the rule! You might not agree with it... hell I don’t think I fucking do anymore... but the lockdown restrictions have not changed since they were put in place. End of story. At no point did they caveat it legislation with ‘but of course, if you personally feel it’s ok and your opinion is that the NHS is fine and the numbers are low enough - even if this is based on no scientific evidence whatsoever - then please feel free to decide which bits of the legislation you don’t fancy sticking to anymore and crack on’

It just isn’t the case! The government review the situation. The government use the evidence to decide when and how to lift lockdown. Not each individual. Not Pam at no 23, not your friend’s mates’ girlfriend... the actual government.
They haven’t changed the restrictions yet.

Alsohuman · 08/05/2020 19:43

I certainly would sooner follow guidance based on scientific advisors than follow the guidance of some of you lot who seem to have decided you know better!

If you doubt your ability to assess risk, you’re doing the right thing.

Rhodri · 08/05/2020 19:44

My neighbour is a NHS nurse and treats Covid patients. She’s always moaning on about social distancing and staying safe. But she’s had her children and grandchildren visiting, they had a VE Day party today and she gave my DS a cupcake over the fence. Hypocrite. No doubt she was offended when I snatched it away and disinfected his hands.

Ethelfleda · 08/05/2020 19:44

We're free to have a bit of common sense

And as for this... common sense is not as common as you think.
You seem fairly level headed and switched on. I have no reason to doubt that you could undertake a non essential journey with minimal risk. But if yo are allowed to use common sense, then that means everyone is. And many, many people in this country don’t have much of it. Their version of lockdown rules probably look similar to life before Covid. There is a major issue with allowing the individual to decide for themselves what should be allowed and what isn’t.

Ethelfleda · 08/05/2020 19:45

If you doubt your ability to assess risk, you’re doing the right thing

Are you familiar with the Dunning-Kruger effect?

Alsohuman · 08/05/2020 19:55

Yes I am. And I am also familiar with my ability to assess risk, which normally tends to err on the side of caution.

Ethelfleda · 08/05/2020 19:59

I am familiar with my lack of knowledge about a novel virus that still most of the world’s brightest minds do not understand.

NikeDeLaSwoosh · 08/05/2020 20:00

@Ethelfleda

Why don't you actually read the regulations? I've even posted the relevant section for you so you don't even have to do a search!

There is an exception under s6(2)(a) for exactly the scenario to which you refer.

Ethelfleda · 08/05/2020 20:00

Literally the message on every government website. Do not meet up with friends or family. I don’t think it could be more clear.

Again - not saying I even agree with it.... just saying, if you do - they you’re not adhering to the restrictions.

People who aren’t quite getting it...
NikeDeLaSwoosh · 08/05/2020 20:02

@Ethelfleda

While we're on the subject, can you point to where in the legislation there is any reference to 'essential journeys only'?

Ethelfleda · 08/05/2020 20:03

Nike are you reading the same thing I am?
I’m saying the people I know are NOT delivering supplies to vulnerable people?

NikeDeLaSwoosh · 08/05/2020 20:03

x post

That isn't the legislation though!

I'm absolutely flabbergasted that a grown woman cannot distinguish between law and government propaganda Shock

Alsohuman · 08/05/2020 20:04

So you can stand two metres behind a stranger for ten minutes in a supermarket queue but you can’t stand two metres away from your mum for ten minutes for a chat on the way back? Have I got that right? If so, perhaps you can explain the logic?

Original poster
MadameBee · 08/05/2020 20:04

I don’t get your obsession with this legislation.

You are clinging to it likes it’s a fucking shield that is going to protect you from all evil.

Look around you - people are dying.

OP posts:
NikeDeLaSwoosh · 08/05/2020 20:05

I’m saying the people I know are NOT delivering supplies to vulnerable people?

Perhaps not, but they could reasonably argue that they are contributing to the functioning of the household of a vulnerable person (mental health reasons are perfectly valid here btw)

Original poster
MadameBee · 08/05/2020 20:06

Good to know that there are purple on MN who know better that Chris Whitty though 👍🏻Maybe you are Chris Witty, who knows 🤷‍♀️

OP posts:
Original poster
MadameBee · 08/05/2020 20:06

*people

OP posts:
NikeDeLaSwoosh · 08/05/2020 20:06

I don’t get your obsession with this legislation

Ethelfleda · 08/05/2020 20:08

I’m using ‘essential journeys’ as an umbrella term to cover all those reasons in the legislation you posted. Clearly, I’m not going to list them all out every time I refer to them.

Alsohuman · 08/05/2020 20:08

Here you go Nike

People who aren’t quite getting it...
Ethelfleda · 08/05/2020 20:09

So you can stand two metres behind a stranger for ten minutes in a supermarket queue but you can’t stand two metres away from your mum for ten minutes for a chat on the way back? Have I got that right? If so, perhaps you can explain the logic?

Both carry risk of infection.
One is an essential journey to obtain food.
The other isn’t.
If you do both, you double your risk.

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