Anyone in their 40's have advice for anyone in their 30's

[Annamaria14]

You know they say that life begins at 40. I have been worrying and stressing quite alot in my thirties, I have been imagining myself in my forties, caring less about what people think, happier, wiser.

I am 36.

What advice would the 40+ year olds give to the the 30+ year olds on here?

I am approaching 40. I would just say go for everything you want, don’t worry about your age or what people think.

Don't listen to your biological clock.

Other sun song but stealing shine not screen.

And of course you can't become if you only say what you would have done

Grab life. Bucket list it. I thought I’d have a comfy life of sorts. It has turned into something else entirely.

If you are free to do something and can - then do it. The stuff I wanted to do in my forties is looking like I will be doing it in my 70s.

Do it while your bosom doesn’t need to be tucked into your tights

Have lots of babies. I had 5 - best thing I ever did. Have a lucrative career. Even 40 years after I started studying formine at age 17 it is as wonderful as it was 40 or 30 years ago.

You are not at fat as you think you are !

I wish I could say that to my 15year old size 8 self hippo ! And my size 14 39 year old self.

I’ve given myself a lifetime of grief over my size and am truly fat now!

(The dog I look after thinks I’m comfy though so happy days!)

Surround yourself with people that make you happy and get you.

If there's a job etc you've dreamed off doing - do it. I changed careers at 40 and love the job I do now, this involved going to university for 3 years and obtaininig a degree (something I never thought I could do).

Invest in a good skincare regime. Your face will thank you.

Be kind to yourself and others.

40s are fun and fearless.

Have Christmas where you like, with who you like.

Learn from every daily experience you have. Even if it’s only never to do it again.

Wear sunscreen
Use retinol
Enjoy yourself more and worry less

Use Suncream! Have your kids - so much more exhausting in forties!

Do your pelvic floor exercises
Make the most of your looks and hair - appreciate what you have. The peri-menopause may affect you badly (I suffered bad hair loss).

Oh, and I forgot, look after your joints. Trust me on this

Enjoy being able to get off the floor from a squat/kneel without having to grab onto something. (Though that is for later than 40s in my case )

I don't know if you have children, OP. If not - and you want them - always try and to get to a place in your career where you can pick things up again, it's awful to feel insecure about jobs and finances. If you do want children then think long and hard and ask honest parents what it is like. If you are not sure if you want them then you probably don't, so go enjoy yourself, forties can be brilliant.

I am 48, OP.

I had a complete crisis at 40, which ended up in divorce.

All I would say is that I thought I was ancient when I was 36. However, I would love to be 36 now.

Do you have children? This makes a difference to any advice that you might be offered, other than generically.

Use neck cream

I would have objected to Xenia's career advice when I was 36, FWIW (I was a thousand percent a SAHM by then). I think I agree with it now, though.

90% of what seems important now, isn't.
90% of who seem important now, aren't.
Sadly it will probably take you most of your 40s to realise it, but if you can grasp it in your 30s, that's a heck of a head start.

Tell someone you care about, how you feel, even if it's embarrassing. Be it a teacher who influenced you massively, a romantic situation, or just parents, brothers, sisters. Just tell them.

Omg definitely do your pelvic floor!!

You’re not getting old so don’t give up on any ideals you have be it relationship, family, travel, job or looks. Make the best of what you have. Don’t tolerate shit from people just because you’re nice. Be ambitious.

Don’t worry OP, you won’t feel any different when you turn 40, just be you.

@MadameBee What is the reason for doing pelvic floor exercises?!

To all women of childbearing age:

Do not procreate with a fuckwit. This is important.