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Original poster

To be really sad that Amanda Palmer and Neil Gaiman have separated.

182 replies

blueglassandfreesias · 04/05/2020 16:42

Officially cabin fevered now but I have followed both of their careers and always felt slightly that Neil Gaiman held all the power since AP had their child 4 years ago. She posts often about how much she loves him, he never does this.
They were in lockdown in New Zealand together then suddenly he left to hid house in Scotland.
I feel really sorry for her stuck in a country with their child, heartbroken and unable to face to face sort it all out with her husband.

OP posts:
zscaler · 04/05/2020 18:49

They aren’t really fantasy in the realm of Harry Potter. Most of them are hard to shoehorn into a single genre. American Gods for example - definitely not pure fantasy, and one of the most impressive novels from the last 50 years.

Insertdeadcatsnamehere · 04/05/2020 18:52

Love Dresden Dolls and his books but I've always suspected both of them are pretty pretentious, self important and unpleasant in person. They appear to basically be famous versions of the people in goth clubs who you'd avoid like the plague. Very hard work.

Musereader · 04/05/2020 19:02

I'm a fan of his work. He's a big deal in the sci fi community (though he writes fantasy it comes under the spec fic umbrella) I thought he lived in america though. While he was born here he moved over there in the 90's so im baffled why he is in skye

Butterymuffin · 04/05/2020 19:09

Know his books, didn't know her. Can't help thinking that if this was posted in relationships, everyone would be massively down on him for being so entitled as to fuck off to the other side of the world and leave her as sole carer for their 4 year old.

bridgetreilly · 04/05/2020 19:10

unless she's a complete and utter nightmare to live with,

Everything I know about her suggests she would be, yes.

CarpeVitam · 04/05/2020 19:14

I can't believe some people haven't heard of Neil Gaiman! 😐

KindnessCrusader · 04/05/2020 19:16

@ilikebooksandplants I've read 30 books this year, I've never heard of him Confused

LadyMacbethWasMisunderstood · 04/05/2020 19:23

I too am really really surprised that people do not know who Neil Gaiman is (I’m not surprised people are uninterested in his romantic life; that is a different issue). Not everyone can know everything and there is no shame in not knowing. But it’s not a badge of honour either. It’s not something to be actively proud of.

notquiteruralbliss · 04/05/2020 19:23

I’m with you OP though I am not surprised. I get the impression that Amanda ( and maybe Neil) would be hard to live with. I don’t really know Neil’s work apart from Good Omens but I love Amanda’s work. I loved the Dresden Dolls and tgeb‘no Intermission’ shows were incredible. IIRC the open marriage was more theoretical than actual once she had Ash. And it (along with not living together) was one of her conditions for marrying.

ChainsawBear · 04/05/2020 19:26

Am not really surprised. They never struck me as particularly stable, either separately or together (well, all right, Gaiman is pretty stably Gaiman).

I used to love Amanda - one of her shows was probably my favourite ever years ago - but she pissed me off and disappeared up her own arse long since. And Gaiman was mostly revealed through their relationship to be a colossal wanker, talented writer though he is.

Original poster
blueglassandfreesias · 04/05/2020 19:43

If you just google image their names, every photo seems to be him pulling away and her leaning in.
I feel sad because she’s a mother of a young child having to carry on parenting single handedly while everyone she knows is elsewhere in the world.

OP posts:
WombOfOnesOwn · 04/05/2020 19:52

I can't wait to find out which it'll be:

A: Smug conscious uncoupling once they get their stories straight about how it's really an evolution of their relationship, not a dissolution, and how people change and that's ok

B: Mudslinging, a full recounting of the times they've broken previous agreements in the context of their poly relationship, and revelations about secret illegitimate children or inappropriate relationships.

Either way, that's now four children Neil's abandoned to move to other continents. Even before he fully abandoned ship on his current marriage, the couple said they were in a "long distance relationship" even with a child in the picture. Of course, Ms. Palmer was the one with the kid nearby, he got to drop in as he wanted.

I have very little respect for either of these individuals and feel absolutely awful for their child, stuck alone in quarantine with a grieving, attention-seeking mother who has proven psychologically unstable and reactive on multiple occasions.

TheProdigalKittensReturn · 04/05/2020 19:59

Wow, that Guardian interview. They both sound absolutely insufferable.

Asuitablecat · 04/05/2020 20:01

I once spent a whole gig staring at a man I thought was N G. Spurred on by a slightly liquid evening and Dh, I finally trotted over to ask.

It wasn't him.

HadEnoughOfMichaelBolton · 04/05/2020 20:08

I honestly couldn't care less. Their relationship is their business.

MorganKitten · 04/05/2020 20:10

She posts often about how much she loves him, he never does this.

But he’s always at her shows supporting her, she did a three night small venue my friend owns and NG was at every show.

They had an open marriage and never lived in the same house together for long.
My friend used to date one of his daughters and there’s some amazing stories.

I am surprised with so many of his books being films or tv shows people haven’t heard of him.

MorganKitten · 04/05/2020 20:14

Oh also she posted about it without talking to him.
They were going through stuff before lockdown. Since she posted he’s had a lot of trolls attack him on social media.

Bienentrinkwasser · 04/05/2020 20:17

I was a massive Dresden Dolls fan in my youth. I still have a Devotchka flyer signed by Amanda from when I was 13! However, she does seem really hard work. And I’ve always found their relationship a bit creepy. I’m not really sure why though.

frumpety · 04/05/2020 20:19

Genuinely never heard of either of them, but if he has written a good book or few, I am always up for a reccomendation. Smile

Iooselipssinkships · 04/05/2020 20:23

Dresden Dolls were great. Coin Operated Boy a personal fave.

NurseButtercup · 04/05/2020 20:29

@CarpeVitam
🙋🏾‍♀️ I had to google him, I've never read any of his books, haven't watched any of his films or TV programs. I've heard of American Gods - saw the trailer wasn't my cup of tea.

MorganKitten · 04/05/2020 20:49

@frumpety
Good Omens
Neverwhere
Coraline
Stardust
American Gods

12345kbm · 04/05/2020 20:50

Neil Gaiman has been around since the graphic novel Sandman in the late 80s.

He wrote Good Omens with Terry Pratchett which was made into a recent TV series starring David Tennant.

He also wrote American Gods which is also a TV series.

Stardust was made into a film and starred Michelle Pfeiffer and Robert De Niro amongst others.

He also wrote Coraline which was made into an animated film.

He writes mainly fantasy.

He comes across to me as pretty gentle, very talented and kind. I don't follow him on Twitter or know anything about his marriage. I've been a fan for a long time, am surprised people haven't heard of him. It's like saying you haven't heard of Terry Pratchett.

ViciousJackdaw · 04/05/2020 20:51

How have we managed to get to page 5 of a thread about Amanda Palmer with no mention of her eyebrows?

KotoMoto · 04/05/2020 21:19

@ilikebooksandplants to clarify, I didn't mean "is it an over 40's book"- I was referring to the more general conversation happening with various pp saying they'd never heard of either of these people. I merely wondered if it was a generational thing eg, more people 40+ would likely have heard of them both.

Not into fantasy type novels myself so makes sense I'd only vaguely heard of him.