ABU to put a note on my very rural door telling randoms to eff off.

[KnickersandGnomes]

Possibly outing but I'm a bit freaked out. Nearest neighbours are over a mile away, they really are - I live in the middle of nowhere. Couriers wont deliver because they swear they can't find the place blah blah etc etc.

I have some pretty horrid health issues, mostly Lyme Disease based and they leave me so tired and wrung out.

This afternoon I had some unexpected knocking at my door which I ignored followed up by a woman's voice in my garden and banging on my living room, bedroom and porch windows.

There was nothing put though my letter box and my garden gate was left wide open (mahoosive no no as I have five dogs) and it's left me both angry and scared.

I don't like or want to be angry and scared but I am both now so I'm hoping that the Mumsnet wisdom can help?

I have no recent partner that I have parted with on bad terms and because of my illness I live a very quiet life these days so I am utterly lost?

Our neighbour won’t answer her door. We had building work done, I went to tell her as a courtesy (we’re detached), I went round lots of times, left notes with my number, builder also put a note through with his details. I also tracked down her landlord and let him know. But from her - nothing. Fast forward a few months and she was banging on our door shouting about no one telling her what was going on 🙄 It’s silly to refuse to answer your door. The world is not out to get you.

Banging on the windows sounds like there was an emergency.

I hope she managed to find someone who was willing to help!

People on MN who refuse to answer their door cannot then start threads complaining that they didn't know what the knockers wanted.

It's just weird.

There are 10,001 reasons why someone might knock at a rural door. 9,999 aren't to murder you or rob you.

I answered the door to a stranger who said “Excuse me, did you know your house was on fire?”

No I didn’t know, but she was right.

It’s a big house, painters had gone home but had been stripping wood right at the top of the house and it had smouldered and then started burning properly. I was downstairs in the conservatory, blissfully unaware.

Fire brigade sorted it, helped by the painters’ scaffolding.

I was very glad I had answered the door.

I always answer the door because I want to know who it is.
Its easy to get rid of unwelcome callers, just say you can't talk because the dog's shit everywhere and you're in the middle of cleaning up.
The first time I said this, to Jehova's witnesses, it was actually true. Worked so well I've used it ever since .

If someone didn’t answer their door I’d suspect they were running scared of debt collectors!

There are 10,001 reasons why someone might knock at a rural door. 9,999 aren't to murder you or rob you

Also. murderers don't tend to knock as they tend, statistically, to be people you already know, so would already be inside, and robbers are most likely to knock to check whether someone is in, so NOT answering (whether by opening the door or calling out) is the fastest way to invite them in!

Nobody’s obliged to answer their door, however weird that might seem to others. I would find it odd and a bit threatening if someone started banging on windows as well. I’m intrigued to find out who the OP’s visitor was though. A shame it looks like we won’t be enlightened any further!

If you are on the at risk register it may simply have been a volunteer dropping in to see if you are ok and have enough food etc especially given your rural location

the reason you are so anxious is because of not answering.

If you answer the door (or call through it), then you know what is going on. you realise that there is nothing to fear.

Exactly. You have created your own anxiety here. If you'd simply called out "who is it?" you'd have had your answer, the person would have gone, and you'd be fine now. But the not knowing has built your anxiety up.

There are a myriad of reasons why someone might have gone to great lengths to try to get an answer. None of them threatening to you. In fact a criminal would have avoided gaining your attention.

Well I was one who mentioned the possibility of an emergency and have been targeted to a campaign of harassment. (In this case intended to extort money) So it is possible to have had both.
I'd have should through the door first, though, to ask who it was and what they wanted when the harassment campaign was at it's height.

How bizarre-is have just answered the door.

Sounds like rural living isn’t for you.

I'd have shout through the door, not should

Currently quite a lot of police work involves breaking in to properties to find / remove the bodies of those who've passed from Covid19. Could it have been the police? They may well come back if they didn't get an answer yesterday.

Could it have been a local church/locals checking up on residents? If it's happened before they might be just concerned about you and are doing their bit in the current crisis?

Could you get a ring doorbell? You could answer through that and ask what they want next time.

Those recommending chains don’t really know how flimsy they are and how little “protection” they offer. If you open to door with chain a foot in the door will stop it closing and a simple shoulder barge will pop the chain off. They’re not worth the money fitting tbh. But OPs anxiety needs to be addressed I agree. Or failing that, better perimeter fencing and access. Bigger, uninterrupted fence with an electronic access gate.

What's wrong with you. Just answer the bloody door!! Why is it any more normal for someone to be knocking on my door in a residential area. It's not if someone needs to speak to you they knock on your door.

I think if you're freaked out by a stranger knocking at your door, that's not really the stranger's fault. And if you're scared about living on your own, you'd be better off not living somewhere so isolated.

Could have been an adult social worker or something.

A concerned neighbour? You say it happens a lot. Really? And you never answer the door?

Someone's knocking on the door, somebody's ringing the bell...

Imagine the poor person standing there ignored with their giant check!

I live rurally, in a small hamlet but not isolated completely. The reason people hammer on my door is usually:

To read the electric meter, also hammer on windows and walk round the garden if I don't answer immediately.

Someone else's delivery where the delivery person doesn't care who he leaves it with so long as he gets a signature.

Postie now hammers on door and puts stuff in porch, no problem.

Someone random giving me a stray dog x 3.

Police in my garden delivering letter to naughty son of neighbours. Police wearing headcams and hiding in the lane. Police also asking me if I know why someone is calling for help. Yes, it's from the adjacent Dementia Care Unit.

I really don't like people hammering on my door since on a dark winter's evening someone told me their bike had broken down and I let him in. He creeped me out and I rang for a taxi and gave him £10. Yes, I know I was incredibly stupid but he left when the taxi arrived. Never again and he never gave me the £10 back.

Could have been a scammer, making a fuss in the garden and banging on windows to draw the OP attention while someone else tries to break in round the other side. She could have been faking an emergency! I would be wary of this.

I wouldn't open the door either. You don't know who she is and who could be with her.

OP, please get a chain and lock for your gate and a do not knock sign and a chain for your front door.

Maybe her husband or partner had had a heart attack or similar and was hoping you might help.

Wildfireponie

If it were a scammer, I'd have thought the sound of five dogs going completely OTT would have put them off even knocking, let alone the mysterious 'someone else' breaking in round the back!

If your windows are single glazed and thin why didnt you shout through the closed window? You would have got the gist of why she was there.