Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU about a status??

106 replies

Johnskymberlina · 28/04/2020 11:01

Hi all

Ok, maybe I'm overthinking it but hubby changed his WhatsApp photo to a picture of us as a couple - no kids as he didn't want a contact to see them. Fine, not bothered but I noticed the status 'remember the times of freedom' I haven't said anything to him but feel a bit hurt deep down?? I don't see my children as me not having freedom?? Am I overthinking this??

OP posts:
Kittykat93 · 28/04/2020 11:05

Well have you asked him what the status means?? I do think youre over thinking this though... Its a WhatsApp photo of u as a couple.. What's the issue??

nahnonever · 28/04/2020 11:05

Is he referring to lockdown?

Dyrne · 28/04/2020 11:06

Is there something going on that’s made you jump to a pretty wild conclusion?

Lots of people are missing “freedom” at the moment because we’re all stuck in the house only able to leave for specific things. That’s what I’m pretty sure any logical person would assume the status is about - what’s going on that you’d assume it’s about children?

TeaAndBiscuits666 · 28/04/2020 11:06

Yes you're overthinking it.

At the moment 'freedom' probably refers to lockdown not children.

araiwa · 28/04/2020 11:07

Why do you think hes talking about your children?

Is there anything going on all over the world at the moment that could be affecting his freedom....

Oysterbabe · 28/04/2020 11:07

Surely he means before lockdown?

RedRed9 · 28/04/2020 11:07

Have you actually asked him about it?

Why did you immediately jump to the conclusion that it’s was about having children?

zscaler · 28/04/2020 11:07

It sounds like an unthinking joke to me. There’s no doubt you would have had more freedom as a couple before you had kids - I think it’s ok to fondly reminisce about those times. It doesn’t mean he’s wishing the kids away, or would change anything.

DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult · 28/04/2020 11:08

I definitely think you're overthinking things. We are in lockdown, I miss having freedom, it's no reflection on my days before children though, I just miss going to the pub, or nipping out to visit people.

Justkeepswimmingdory · 28/04/2020 11:08

I can understand you being hurt completely but at the end of the day my kids being around me constantly atm and having to do school work with them when they arent interested and the constant tantrums/fighting between them they are driving me up the wall so it wouldn't be out of this world for me to 'remember the days of freedom'. It doesnt mean I regret them or anything. He probably thinks he's being funny!

RedskyAtnight · 28/04/2020 11:10

DH and I say this all the time. It doesn't mean we are wishing the children away or wishing we hadn't had them - just a feeling of nostalgia when our lives were different.

Think you are massively overthinking.

HeresMe · 28/04/2020 11:11

I think he's trying to remember the days before lockdown to me.

teqcar · 28/04/2020 11:11

Surely he means the times of freedom with you, because we have had that freedom ripped away from us?

That said, it's seems so obvious to me and posters above that it you have taken it as a slight against yourself you need to ask yourself why. Have you got some relationship problems?

cacaca · 28/04/2020 11:13

He’s your husband - surely you can just ask him without starting a thread asking complete strangers who do not know you or your husband?

Blurby · 28/04/2020 11:14

I don't think the profile change and status update go hand in hand.

Dyrne · 28/04/2020 11:15

I have to say though, if it’s gotten to the point where you’re overanalysing statuses like a 14 year old I think it’s a sign you need to end the relationship anyway. It sounds exhausting - both for you to constantly be overanalysing every slight gesture; and for him to constantly be under suspicion for the most innocuous thing.

FortunesFave · 28/04/2020 11:18

Surely he is referring to lockdown.

2outof3Mightbebad · 28/04/2020 11:19

He means lockdown.

TimeWastingButFun · 28/04/2020 11:19

He means freedom as in coronavirus, surely? That's what I would read into a status like that just now.

Original poster
Johnskymberlina · 28/04/2020 11:21

It's on WhatsApp as a couple as he doesn't want a contact seeing a pic of our children (which it usually is) the status is referring to a holiday we were on where the picture was taken if that makes sense??

I'm just a bit hurt that he feels our children are a burden on our freedom?? Of course we don't have freedom like we used to but he entered parenthood with as much enthusiasm as me

OP posts:
Original poster
Johnskymberlina · 28/04/2020 11:23

The picture was taken on holiday of us as a couple - Pre children with the status 'remembering the times of freedom'

OP posts:
RedRed9 · 28/04/2020 11:25

Have you actually asked him about it?

Wheresthebiffer2 · 28/04/2020 11:25

I think that's a lovely and romantic gesture he's done. Remembering how special it was with just you....

PandaMa · 28/04/2020 11:25

Over thinking. Nothing bad about thinking back on a nice holiday you had alone with your partner and all the things you could do spontaneously without making sure it was child friendly. It doesn't mean he doesn't also love his life now with the kids. It's just different.

Crocky · 28/04/2020 11:26

Have you asked him? Is it likely to be a joke? My relationship status says ‘it’s complicated’ just because I find it amusing.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.