DD punched a wall and is now in agony and can’t move her pinkie, will A&E see her?

[riannonmas]

Had a row with her BF on phone and unfortunately punched a concrete wall not considering consequences. Is now in agony, can’t move her pinky finger and her hand is visibly not right. Ordinarily would take her down straight away but the hospital is a major city university hospital and I imagine (Well, also know based on what I’ve heard through social media) swamped with CV. The walk-in minor injuries centre near us is also now focused on CV and telling people not to come in and only go to A&E if it is life threatening, which DD’s situation isn’t. Otherwise they seem to just want you to suck it up. Don’t want to unnecessarily risk exposing her or our family to CV, especially if A&E won’t see her for the hand injury. She is 17 so I’d only be dropping her off as I doubt they’d let me in. Really I want to take her but DH is against it as is terrified of CV and wants me to look up how to treat it at home.

Your DH should read this:

www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-52417599

You can't treat that sort of injury at home and you don't want the long-term complications if it is not healing well.

You have made the right decision!

I hope the pain and the humiliation she feels when having to explain what happened to the medics teaches her a lesson.

Lovely. Have you thought about a job as a counsellor?

I agree this is not normal behaviour. I’ve been through a lot in my life and have never hurt myself like that. All I’m saying is I agree with PP who is surprised people are treating this as if there’s nothing strange about it.

As well as getting her hand treated I suggest getting help for her or at least some counselling or looking into why she did this.

It’s reckless behaviour and at a time like this when the NHS is already under massive pressure. Maybe she couldn’t help it but that needs to be looked into.

a girl who violently smashes her fist into a brick wall, probably whilst wishing wall was her boyfriend

Are you projecting?

DS broken little finger turned out to be also dislocated...that had to be sorted and would have not resolved by strapping alone

Lovely. Have you thought about a job as a counsellor?

I don't know why you lot are so intent on normalising violent behaviour. If a lad had done this after an argument with your daughters I doubt you'd be calling him a poor poppet

She likely needs this treating, could have easily broken a bone in her hand.

She also needs to curb her temper, if that was her boyfriends face or the face of anyone else she happened to get angry with then the consequences could be far more serious for her. We should not shy away from calling this sort of behaviour out for what it is, violent and abusive, simply as it was perpetrated by a 17 year old young woman. If my son was with a woman who behaved in this sort of a way I would be telling him in no uncertain terms that she has significant problems that need resolving. Now if my daughter was with a man who behaved in this way I would be telling her to walk away immediately, as I am sure most mothers on MN would also do, accompanied by the usual links to domestic abuse support lines, freedom program etc

I hope she gets the help she needs, both physically and emotionally

Tbh kids getting angry and punching a wall as a one-off is more common than you might think, due to it being portrayed quite often in the media as something you do when you are cross at someone. They then, like the OP’s DD find out that actually it is a stupid idea.

She doesn’t need counselling unless she doesn’t learn from this not to punch walls. Suggesting releasing her frustration by punching a cushion might be more appropriate. The best suggestion would be a brisk walk in the fresh air but obviously there are restrictions in place there.

Why do people on here have to take such an extreme position?? I would show some sympathy for the pain and obviously take her to A&E. I wouldn't be calling her poor poppet, I'm sure I'd point out that it's her own damn fault. And I'm sure we'd laugh about it later. These things happen.

DD home now...boxers fracture. Had appropriate treatment. Given pain relief.

Feel the need to say she is a very normal, usually content girl who sometimes can get down but usually deals with it in a healthy, appropriate manner. Her main outlets have always been seeing her friends and her weekend job at some stables which she loved. Both of these things have been taken away from her since the lockdown which she has struggled with and unfortunately her boyfriend has been different with her since the lockdown started and has been talking to her in a very nasty manner which has compounded things. Suddenly started being nice to her again but then changed which caused the argument as she confronted him about it. Today was a very unusual event and she had just reached boiling point. I know my daughter and she wouldn’t hurt a fly ordinarily she certainly wasn’t wishing somebody was there in place of the wall. Me and DH are supporting her over the boyfriend and strongly encouraging her to block him on all channels. Not saying it wasn’t silly of her but my child certainly isn’t a violent uncontrolled danger.

probably whilst wishing wall was her boyfriend

That's quite a conclusion to jump to! I'm reporting this thread now. OP is getting far more grief than is deserved.

We should not shy away from calling this sort of behaviour out for what it is, violent and abusive, simply as it was perpetrated by a 17 year old young woman

I don't think there's much of a link there though. I mean, I'm sure there can be, but I'm also sure there often isn't. I've seen all my kids punch inanimate objects at some point out of frustration/anger. None of them has ever punched a person though.

Don’t like the assumptions it was abusive to or a danger to her boyfriend either. He’s spoken to her like absolute shit over the past couple of weeks and it’s done an awful number on her mental health, facilitating this outburst. Was previously lovely as well and DD has found the whole thing distressing and confusing. Me and DH have been doing everything in our power to get her to cut him off.

Wasn’t going to mention this as didn’t think it was relevant but since people are so keen to make assumptions.

They can still see patients that have injured themselves. In fact a&e and minor injuries are very quiet at the minute. We went the other day and there were only 2 other patients in the waiting room!

Glad you got her seen (I hope your DH realises now that it was the right call!) & very glad you are supporting her wrt the boyfriend.
Hope she heals up quickly

Glad to hear she got sorted

Oakmaiden

Are you projecting?

There are as many people projecting as there are minimising.

I just don't think a one-off, silly striking out at an inanimate object while distressed or frustrated automatically means someone is abusive, mentally unwell or self harming.

Glad she's been seen and treated @riannonmas hope she feels better soon and it heals up well.

Make sure she follows the instructions, especially if they've told her to move her fingers often. If they stiffen up it takes ages to get the flexibility back.

Good, glad you took her in and they've treated it - presumably by splinting it to the ring finger - when the splint comes off, encourage her to take up any physio offered, or, if it's not offered because of the current situation, to try and regain movement and flexibility in it again.
I'm not sure that mine qualified as a "boxer's fracture" (I basically fell onto my little finger knuckle while holding my phone) but it did a GREAT job of shortening the proximal phalanx of my little finger, so it's now nearly a whole cm shorter than the other hand. I'm lucky in being a massage therapist, so could do my own physio, which got back 90%+ flexibility and function, but if I hadn't worked hard on it, it would still be bent and not very functional.

It took me 6 months to be able to write properly with my finger tucked underneath my hand (as usual) - I had to learn to write with it sticking out for a while!

So please please impress on her the importance of getting it as better as possible.

OP I’ve suffered anxiety and depression all my life, had an abusive parent, been in an abusive marriage and lost a child. I have never once punched or kicked something or hurt myself in that sort of way.

No one is trying to upset you but please don’t normalise this behaviour. It is not okay, even if her boyfriend is abusive, and your daughter needs to be told this.

Oh for goodness sake @BrokenJester

If you apply that level of thought, then no one who has been injured doing DIY, or sports should ever go to the doctors or A&E as they've bought the injury on themselves.

People make mistakes, have accidents and get hurt. They deserve to be treated as much as anyone else.

Violent and abusive to hit a wall, is the wall going to see a solicitor, get a life.

OP glad your daughter has been seen, take good care of her.

@TorysSuckRevokeArticle50 Do you really think injury resulting from punching a wall is the same as an injury which results from an accident while doing DIY or sports? We could injure ourselves doing almost anything - travelling, cooking, DIY, fall down the stairs going to bed. Punching a wall is not an accident.