As someone who has gone through IVF , it was like my future had been destroyed along with my hope and dreams. Amazingly I am grateful to say I have two beautiful children (both IVF) but I can't forget that agonising feeling.
It's devastating. It becomes an obsession. My issue wasn't becoming pregnant. It was staying pregnant. I had miscarriage after miscarriage, and having already confirmed those pregnancies nothing could have prepared me for the devastation of those losses, or for knowledge, once I knew I had those babies inside me, or how much I loved and wanted them.
There were myriad possible reasons why it was happening but nothing confirmed. We at last succeeded in having one healthy child, but his twin died so I've never known a pregnancy where I didn't experience a devastating loss. We were never able to have more. I was really sad, but after what we went through I was grateful to have the one.
It cost our life savings, expensive investigations like Chicago blood tests for elevated killer cells, hidden clamydia tests, numerous intrusive examinations, investigations, attempts with Clomid, failed IVF cycles and one successful. In total this must have seen off in excess of £80,000. But I have my beautiful DS, and would have sold the last thing I owned if it meant the chance to have him.
If other women get instantly knocked up then bully for them, but it doesn't give them more of a 'right' to be mothers than those who have to work so hard for it. And I'm among the lucky ones. There are other women like me who never ended up holding their longed-for baby.
I agree with the PP above. It's one of the worst threads I've read on Mumsnet. The country wastes huge sums of money on causes that are far less worthy, and if you're among the ones who ends up paying for this treatment, you pay handsomely. You can trust me on this.
Much empathy, sympathy and positivity goes out to anyone who is suffering through this. I hope your time will come. 