Irritated, irritable and irritating. AIBU to be tolerant in RL and tell them to get fucked on this thread.

[fuckinghellthisshit]

IABU. Unreasonable and I know it.

I am just so fucking irritated at the moment. Everything is grinding my gears. DD's constant fucking exercising, DS leaving his shit everywhere, DH's following me around and just fucking breathing everywhere.
I am being a model of kindness and tolerance but I do wish every bastard one of them would fuck off.

And face timing my DGM97 every day at exactly 6pm to watch her slowly lose her shit (she's been in lockdown for 6 weeks already) and become unkempt is horrendous. Arguing with her for hours about politics (she lives for these debates and asks for robust challenging - good for her mh she says) is exhausting. I just want to lie down, I don't care what Mark fucking Steel is saying today - he can get fucked too.

My mean GD97 who has been living in isolation for 40 years and never wanted a visit or call but suddenly needs the warmth and kindness of his family - well the women in his family, and I am especially sought after as the busiest person. Fuck you mean old man, you are alone for a reason! you made your miserable lonely bed now lie in it!

My normally sane DM is in full lunatic mode, needing constant love and reassurance, leave me alone! I am your child! What about me! Why not rind one of my many bastarding twat brothers. And stop cooking for 12-18 people - there are only 2 of you there - that's why you're getting so fat - not stress hormones.

My tribe of idiot brothers who all refused to accept there was any problem and spouted full Trump rhetoric until my DGM's neighbour died and then had massive mantrums demanding I send them all food. Get fucked!
.
I love these people so very much. I also loved my small business and working, and being on my own a bit. I care so much, but I want a break and a vent. So here, in the safety of MN, I will tell them all to get fucked.

Thank you, I feel so much better now.

OH MAN I AM SO PISSED OF AT MYSELF

I need to join you. DH is on furlough. I am wfh. He does not understand that wfh requires me to work.

He thinks this is one big holiday. Stop drinking so much

And a book For the supermarket queue is the way to go.

And to the theiving scum who cut the catalytic converter out from under my car, thanks, estimate of £2k to fix it. Just what I need right now,

@LakieLady mine must go to the barbers every week for his shave, however since lockdown he has announced he has purchased a ridiculously expensive razor. When I pointed out it was a huge waste of money as he will go back to the barbers after all this he said he might try and only go to the barbers every other week 🙄

@LakieLady I present you with MIL as evidence that the inability to tidy up is male only.

I'm impressed with your scaring away the fry tippers @fuckinghellthisshit. Someone dumped a fridge-freezer on our street. God knows how.

Now, how do I avoid being responsible for meal planning, making and timing for 3 adults and a 6yo?

Peeps. Found. Is all

I am so tired of constant messages and calls from my mother telling me about where her and father went for their 'daily long walk'. The other day I put the phone on silent to avoid it all and ended up with calls to the house phone from her and my brother because they wanted a video call. AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRGGGGHHHH

@LakieLady Thanks for the advanced warning, I'll think it thru. Axe's everywhere, so fucking tempting.
But the bleeding, like a selfish bastarding twat, it'd go everywhere and the cat would lick it so kissing her would be unappealing and then who do I kiss? Who? Who kisses me when I need sweet kisses?
Fuckers. The rum has kicked in btw. And adrenaline from the fly tipping dicks. They've gone to bother some other cunts. Fuck them all.

@LadyMonicaBaddingham a daily long walk off a short pier sounds a worthwhile suggestion.
Fuck that

@ThatUserNamesTakenTryAnother, that sounds tough. Hang on in there and try to remember that the baby months don't last forever.

They just feel as though they do.

@MinnieMountain they did it by being cunts, that's how. And you can avoid it by putting a box of Rice Krispies on the table and laughing, then kicking any fucker who complains fight in their genitals. That's how.
This run is excellent, in case you were wondering.
What delights hide at the back of your liquor cabinet ladies?

@ThatUserNamesTakenTryAnother I'm so glad you got that off your chest? Feeling better? Stronger? Fortified? We're all behind you.

@AuditAngel Oh god that is shit, I am so sorry that happened to you :(

Now, how do I avoid being responsible for meal planning, making and timing for 3 adults and a 6yo?

Get very drunk. Stay very drunk. Until lockdown ends, or even the day after.

I'll leave the full aftermath inspection until daylight, but given the twat can't make a cup of tea (mine) and a coffee (his) without spilling them down the cupboard doors, leaving sugar scattered across the worktop and at least one teaspoon in a little brown puddle on the (white) draining board,

Yes, Lakie - what's the problem with this? How is it possible to slop liquids down the cupboard doors every single time a beverage* is made. EVERY SINGLE TIME!

And having slopped it down, how is it possible not to notice and therefore not to wipe up the spillage?

I mean - just HOW?

*"beverage" - great word, eh?

@AuditAngel. What cunts. Sorry that's happened.

Will your insurance not cover it?

I love this thread, I feel so much better :) thank you all

Now nobody can officially ask me to use my brain for at least 3 weeks, getting drunk and staying drunk sounds like the answer.

@fuckinghellthisshit they are indeed cunts. Would fruit and fibre be an acceptable alternative?

I've exhausted all my cold German largers. Might have to get the sherry out.

But the bleeding, like a selfish bastarding twat, it'd go everywhere and the cat would lick it so kissing her would be unappealing and then who do I kiss? Who? Who kisses me when I need sweet kisses?

That's the trouble - pets can help get murder out of the carpet (er - I expect), but then you would be a little reluctant to kiss them for a while afterwards until at least they'd thoroughly digested any body parts any minor smears.

Thank you, this is the best post I've read in ages!!! Fucking brilliant, with you all the way!

This is the only alcohol I have in my house at the moment. Cooking brandy. FML

What delights hide at the back of your liquor cabinet ladies?

I have a half-empty bottle of a liquer made from quinces. Fuck knows where it came from. It's pretty vile, I tasted it to check.

We've got loads of booze, mainly because I can't get pissed any more because it gives me migraines that make me me wish I had an axe and could chop off my own head. I've been known to vomit at 15 minute intervals for 24 hours or more, and have twice had to go to hospital and be rehydrated via a drip (of course, I don't let on that the migraine was self-inflicted, I enjoy the sympathy too much).

I fancy a drink now though. There's a bottle of Tanquerays and it's calling me...

I'm really enjoying this thread. You should all get a medal.

I'm not experiencing much pent up rage. I've been mithering at dd(25) who's been furloughed and hasn't left the house since Tuesday but other than that it's all quite chilled.

If this had happened 11 years ago and I was still living with the exh and his mother, things would be very very different though.

Yadnbu 100% ! I'm ok some days or moments shall I say then boom I want to kill everyone and divorce too for good measure, its really making me think about everything that irritates me or makes me deeply unhappy, I've been nagging dh to replace the bathroom light it's a funny shaped one that's hard to find and 4 weeks later I'm still using the loo in the dark so I've went nuts tonight I climbed a chair to unscrew the light and bingo light orderd. I only waited because dh insisted he would do it and refuse to let me change it, men such knob gobbled

Bollocks, no fucking tonic water.

I'm sipping a glass of Madeira and pretending I'm a 19th century parson.

Perhaps I'll rename the house Barchester Towers.

In the booze cupboard there is:

3 different bottles of Penderyn whisky;
1 bottle of cheap vodka;
1 bottle of Penderyn vodka;
3 bottles of sherry;
1 bottle of Gordon's;
1 bottle of spiced gin;
1 bottle of Welsh orange marmalade gin;
1 bottle of Kahlua;
1 bottle of Baileys;
1 bottle of mince pie flavoured Bailey's type stuff;
1 bottle of brandy;
1 bottle of Kraken rum;
1 bottle of blue curacao;
1 bottle of spiced rum;
About 5 bottles of wine.