Plated meals or family-style?

[JungleGiraffe]

I grew up with meals being plated in the kitchen by whoever cooked and then brought out to the table. DH grew up in the Netherlands and always did "family-style" where serving dishes are brought out to the table and everyone helps themselves.

AIBU to think family-style is stupid? It causes food waste because you have to make extra because can't predict how much people will take. & it causes over-eating because people keep eating until they're stuffed rather than until their plate is empty. & it wastes time because you need to carry more to the dining room and back (sometimes when we have breakfast at the in-laws there'll be 30 different things on the table!)

@TheWordmeister

"I don't get this comment. In restaurants, food is served in exactly the way we serve at home ie the vegetables are brought to the table in separate dishes. Unless we're talking about Pizza Express type places"

Ignoring the snobtastic dig at pizza express , isn't it highly unusual for everyone to order the same thing when eating out? If everything ordered was generally served in separate serving dishes there would be no room on the table. And as you are so disdainful of "pizza express type places", it's extremely unusual in a fine dining restaurant for the whole plate not to be constructed by the chef. But then you'd know that wouldn't you?

"Family style" makes me anxious about taking too much and looking greedy or too little and looking rude. I much prefer plated up as I can just eat my portion of what's there without overthinking it!

Exactly @shineaflight. High end dining involves careful balancing of all the elements on a plate to give the diner the experience the chef intended. I can’t quite see Guy Savoie or Eric Ripert plonking the baking sheet or frying pan on the table 🤣.

The worst thing is people who plate takeaways.

so people are just trying to copy high end dining because they have "aspirational" lifestyles and need to show off. You are making it even worst

Also haven’t RTFT but it’s ridiculous to say family style means leftovers.

1. If they’re not going to eat it, don’t expect them to just because it’s on their plate

1. Haven’t you ever heard of leftovers? Much easier to preserve if they haven’t been smushed about on someone’s plate

We do a mix of both now the kids have all.left for uni etc. If its just the 2 of us I'll generally plate up but 3 to 5 of us or anymore I do famiky style.

I getnleas waste from family style. I either use the leftovers the next day or freeze them. Leftovers inflated meals can only go in the bin cos no one wants to eat someone else's leftovers.

@OneandTwenty no, that's not what I said at all is it?! I was answering pp who claims that restaurants serve food family style (unless you're a pizza express chav). Simply not true.

Also just realised why the term plate up was sounding odd to me. It's because (unless serving family style) I "dish up". Onto plates generally not dishes

No people are not saying that. 🙄🙄

‘A pizza express chav’

Lovely. Some people need to step away from the internet for a bit.

Well that's what they implied 😂 although I've heard Prince Andrew rates it

On a normal day meals are plated up by whoever cooks (usually me).

For special occasions eg. Christmas the food is in serving dishes on the table and everyone helps themselves.

although I've heard Prince Andrew rates it

Yeah I’ll bet he does...

Slightly off topic but since lockdown started I miss Pizza Express so much.

If it's just us I'd generally plate up (and that's how it was when I grew up) but it depends on the meal.

For guests, always family style as I wouldn't want to decide on portion sizes for other people.

I'm a saucepan plonker.

It's spaghetti with homemade olive bread & salad tonight, so that's a pasta pan, two pans of sauce (ds & dd1 like veggie tomato sauce, dd2 & I like puttanesca), salad bowl & the breadboard. Plus 4x bowls for us to actually eat from.

It all fits on the table, everyone gets a dollop of spaghetti then helps themselves to sauce, salad & bread.

At the end of the meal there might be leftover sauce in the pans (great, freezable) or leftover spaghetti (would normally be my packed lunch to microwave tomorrow, with a spoonful of leftover sauce, but atm more likely to be turned into a frittata for someone's brunch) or leftover bread (someone else's cheese on toast for lunch).

Nothing is wasted - except ok, we do try not to leave salad as it's a bit sad next day.

Whereas if I plated it up, either people wouldn't have enough & have to go to the kitchen for seconds (so why not just serve themselves enough in the first place) or they'd have too much - resulting in either eating more than they need/want or unusable leftovers that have been pushed around the plate...the dogs would be delighted with this scenario, admittedly, but it seems a bit daft.

Well I usually serve the food I make on plates if it's just for my partner and I, but if we have guests over, we do it "family style" which is what I was raised with. My DP just likes it when I make the plate as I know how much she eats.

I don't think I would ever do it with guests as you don't know how much they will eat or what they feel like eating or not eating that day. Perhaps no tomatoes but yes to avocado or no dressing on the salad, or just a small piece of meat? Eh people are different.

We don't have enough suitable dishes to serve ourselves at the table so we plate up in the kitchen. For us it's faster and fairer. Plus I can keep an eye on what the DC eat. One would eat too much, the other too little I need to keep an eye on their portion sizes.

We have napkins and napkin rings too! Was trying to cut down on the kitchen roll/paper napkins we used and the washables have been excellent.

There's often a few things in the middle of the table to serve yourself (garlic bread/salad/carrot sticks/cucumber etc)

I think it’s just two different mind sets.

It seems those who plate up, cook just enough, so portion it out so everyone gets their share, maybe a little left over, and no one gets too little or takes too much, it’s about portion control for what’s available

For those who do family style they cook enough that people can eat what they want, no one is greedy and takes more than their share if something is limited, and left overs clearly are easily put back in the fridge, or popped in the freezer, those they dine with can manage their own portion control.

It’s just different ways to do it, different mindsets, different families, different attitudes to food..for some it’s about sharing, for others it’s about individual portions.

We always cook more than enough when others are joining us. When it’s just the two of us we either cook the quantity we think we’re going to need; if it turns out we underestimated and we get hungry later we can always have a snack, or sometimes we deliberately cook a little extra in order to have some leftovers as the base for another meal, or sometimes we batch cook for convenience and cost-effectiveness.

Either way works fine for preventing waste - everything we buy and cook gets used as we both hate wasting food and money.

Depends what the meal is and, possibly more importantly, what it has been cooked in...

If we have guests I put everything out for people to help themselves.

Day to day family meals, I plate up. I know how much everyone will eat and don't want extra serving dishes to clear up.

I sometimes do plating up, I always used to do this and have moved more over to family style.

Everyone seems to enjoy family style more and I don't cook any extra food or have any waste.

I don’t get the ‘have you never eaten in a restaurant comments’. In that instance, the chef has usually planned the plate to the nth degree, balancing the flavours and ‘designing’ the dish. I understand why it is ‘presented’ to the diner.

I’m guessing bangers and mash at home needs less artistry and therefore people can help themselves.

And also back at ya @lilgreen.