Shamed by vegan friend

[catsarelifetome]

I'm a vegetarian, and I have been since early teens. I know many vegans view vegetarians as hypocrites for still consuming animal products, and I do feel guilty about that. I buy vegan whenever possible, but due to having anaemia and a busy lifestyle it would be very hard and restrictive to adopt a vegan lifestyle 100%.

A friend I hadn't spoken to in a while messaged me to catch up the other day. She is a very strict vegan and we used to have lots of conversations about animal welfare etc. She asked if I have turned vegan yet. I said not quite, but I buy vegan as much as possible. She messaged back shame on you, please think about the poor cows and hens when you next go shopping.

It's played on my mind and I feel guilty. I haven't responded yet

Every time you pick a lettuce or any other vegetable it screams.

The screaming lettuces would make a good band name.

If you really care about animal welfare, lobby for dagging to be outlawed

Because fly-blown sheep are so much nicer.

pp cotton!!! its requires massive amounts of water & chemicals which destroy environment around

One of the absolutely best arguments for genetic engineering, cotton.

I’ve been anaemic for 30 years and manage fine, your green veg is rich in iron, your body doesn’t need milk or eggs.

Vegetable based iron isn't absorbed as well as that from animal products. Perhaps it's why you've been anaemic for thirty years?

I'm reminded of a good friend of mine, who is an evangelical Christian. He so wants to convert other people around him that he can't help but criticise and chide mutual friends, particularly those of different faiths. I try to remind him that, in the bible, Jesus lived by example and rarely criticised others.
I actually quite enjoy debating the philosophical and ethical dilemmas at the heart of veganism. But only with those people I know very well. Some people are just incapable of a more nuanced view.

Her response was OTT , shes sounds a bit fanatical tbh not to mention unreasonable! Veganism is much harder than vegetarianism , you are doing your bit, dont feel bad or guilty.

you can buy ethical ( but pricey )milk online , free range eggs locally etc dont engage in a debate with her, she doesn't sound like a nice friend.

@JKScot4 😆 that’s probably why you’ve been anaemic, you dingbat.

How other people choose to eat is entirely up to them. Whether you agree with it is an irrelevance, so long as it’s not illegal. So leave them alone and stop trying to force your way as the best way. It’s the same with birth and parenting and baby feeding, people get weirdly evangelical and weirdly involved in other people’s lives, often assuming their way is the gospel.

However people eat, there is a human and animal cost. Veganism has a huge impact in the world, unless you’re growing and consuming your own produce and ingest nothing from outside.

And if I hear one more person say that vegans can’t get COVID-19, I’m going to start flinging lamb chops in fury.

I was anaemic long before I was vegan and now don’t need supplements so you can keep your ‘dingbat’ remarks.

Text her back

You know you are right, I'm not fully committed and as I'm anemic I'm going to follow the best diet for my health, starting with fillet steak.

Just ignore shes no friend.

I've never met a preachy vegan. I feel kind of left out now 😔.

I have however come across many aggressive defensive meat eaters 🤷‍♀️.

Not entirely sure what almonds or avacodos have to do with veganism either. They aren't grown specifically for vegans and it is not compulsory for a vegan to eat those things either.

The only people I know who eat avacodos are not vegan 🤷‍♀️.

There is no doubt that a fresh food diet is healthier and obviously ethically superior. I don't eat meat my vegan friends have tried to educate me on how to make the switch. Though looking for appropriate substitutes for cheese milk and egg was a challenge and expensive especially with children. Perhaps I need to be more committed.
If my friend ever called me names I'd be inclined to tell her to feck off.

When was the last vegan bashing thread?

We're I vegan, I think I'd be more annoyed at the people who use it as an excuse to behave poorly than those who criticise them for it.

I was put off veganism for years for the same reason aquashiv, all the egg/cheese subs were rank. But I realised last year that if I wanted to go vegan it'd be better to just adopt a new way of cooking that didn't use these things. So making things either without cheese and eggs, or enjoying the alternatives in their own right without expecting them to taste like the real thing. For example I make a "quiche" alternative using silken tofu which I think is delicious but it isnt the same as actual quiche. I've just made peace with the idea of not eating actual quiche again. For me it was worth it to make those changes but obviously not everyone will feel the same. But I do think that if you go into veganism trying to find direct substitutes and trying to cook vegan versions of everything you used to eat then you're going to struggle/eat lots of processed garbage. You need a whole shift of the way you cook, which obviously won't be possible for everyone.

A lot.of vegans are bonkers. Not all of them of course, but many of them. You don't need someone like that in your life, cut her out.

I was completely vegetarian for many years, however, nowadays in order to stay healthy I eat fish and some dairy.
Many vegan products are not very nice, are expensive also, so I usually do not buy them.
I try to buy ethically wherever I can, and try to live simply.
When people ask why I refuse to eat meat etc, they occasionally tut tut at my answer.
Life is short and we are only here once, I have seen a lot in life, worked with all manner of people, but I am too old (and maybe cynical) to put up with the judgement of others.
You don't need to be preached at, so don't accept it. Consider whether she is a friend in real life and go from there.
Your life, your choice.

Bygrabtharshammer,
Absolutely agree with your post.

Nobody is perfect. There are welfare considerations or environmental concerns around pretty much everything available to buy. You are one person. You can't save the whole planet alone, you can only do what you can.

I've a friend who is often on about the ills of the meat industry, yet she spends a fortune on international travel. Different people have different priorities and will want to save the world in different ways. Do what you can depending on what's important to you.

silly woman. if we all reduced our consumption instead of an all or nothing approach, which puts so many people off, the impact would be much greater. I'm not a veg or a vegan but i am 'plant based', so i may buy, cook, consume, occasionally, meat etc. which is for me the actual sustainable option and still speaks to the food and farming industries.

Ah well. We all make our choices. I know my impact on the planet would be lessened it I were vegan and I know animals suffer because I choose to keep consuming dairy. I just own the fact I'm making a selfish choice. Pretending otherwise is just silly. Other choices I make are good ones. I doubt your friend is perfect, none of us are.

Good post.
I’ve already said I think vegans have it sussed but I’m not one. Why? I can’t be bothered with the extra hassle. Kudos to those that can.

Yeah, I don’t want to see animals suffer unnecessarily. But I know I’m too selfish to be vegan! 🤷🏻‍♀️