Neighbour isn't a key worker

[TrulyOutrageousJem]

Since working from home I have moved my desk into the bay window. It's nice to see cars and occasionally people and to not be staring at a blank wall. I'm new to the street and only moved in two months ago so I'm not on chatting terms with anybody yet just a polite hello.

As I'm in the window I have noticed that my neighbour facing gets up each day, takes her small baby (younger than one) to the nursery and her kids to school then comes back home. She isn't working outside of the home as far as I can see and both her and her partner are there all day. She drops the smallest off at 8am and picks up at 5:30pm Monday - Friday so not even a reduced time. I like to keep to myself but it's driving me insane that she is playing the system while I have my small children, yes driving me insane, while trying to work and homeschool but that is just the way it is.

Today it looks like they are doing a spot of DIY because they are childless for the day/week?!?!!!

I desperately want to say something.

Their

Both DH and I are key workers (not NHS or supermarket but you'd soon know if we weren't working!) We are both at home 90% of the time but could be called in at the drop of a hat and have conference calls a lot of the day. We have a 1yo and a 4yo and they are both in nursery all day m-f as it would be impossible to work with them at home. I think you're incredibly judgemental OP. I have some flexibility in my hours too so managed to work longer Mon-Thurs (during my usual commute time) so had Friday afternoon off and did some DIY child free!

@Umascooter - you are being hugely offensive and should question your profession if you think someone bitching about their neighbour using childcare or anyone posting similar is in a 'trauma place' in any way comparable to the victims of rape and sexual assault you claim to work with.

Fucking hell. What did you think you were saying? Because it's coming across as grossly offensive, idiotic, minimising and a number of other terms but i'm so stunned I can't find all of them.

This bloody virus is turning us into a nation of busybodies who love to see people allegedly flouting the rules. It's not helpful. Some people will follow the rules to the letter, some won't. Us getting on our soap boxes makes little difference. As I say to my class (constantly some days) when they're telling tales "Just worry about yourself and make sure you're doing the right thing!"

Could she be on call or something like that? I’m a keyworker under social care through my job in housing but am mainly wfh. If I get suddenly called out for work though I have to go and can’t take my children with me in which case dh will have to come home from work to take them and it will be a massive faff if I have to be somewhere quickly. Mine aren’t in childcare but they could be and if I was in a busier phase work wise then they probably should be just in case. Could it be something like our situation?

I'm a key worker and am WFH. I do have to go out on emergency visits but my partner watches them. He's also entertaining them in the day so I can make confidential calls and concentrate!

I was entitled to send them to school, I opted not to because I'm on immunosuppressants. But info did my. Sigh ours would see me dropping them off then returning home. Because that's where I work...

How are people still expecting them to provide free childcare when they should/would’ve arrange for an alternative if this crisis hadn’t arrived?

A lot of holiday provision isn't open.

The playscheme and holiday club I run should have been open for the Easter holidays. We run from the school building and would have 40 kids each day. We're not open so anyone planning to use us and, for example, a grandparent who falls into the extremely vulnerable category, has had their whole childcare plan wiped out.

That's why childcare is still being provided. Where my cousin lives in Scotland the hub school is open for key workers children from 8-8 Mon-Fri (and some hours at the weekend as well) and includes preschool age kids as well. They've just recognised there is a need for it to keep key essential workers able to go.

My husband WFH and has for the few years. He is a key worker in healthcare, and at the moment because of the nature of his job and the resources he manages, which are vital to the Covid 19 efforts, the level of work he is doing has increased considerably. For large bouts of the day, 7 days a week he is now doing a fairly good impression of a brick wall towards any attempts at communication from me and the kids. He is on conference calls most of the day at a high level and yes he can't do his job whilst looking after 3 small children, not possible at all, it would be neglectful and put the children at risk. I also am in healthcare and work 3 long days a week clinically supporting the NHS. If I was refused emergency childcare on those 3 days based on my husband being at home I would literally have to stop working, taking a frontline worker away from the efforts.
I really don't particularly want to put my kids In school, I feel we as a family are massively at risk for obvious reasons but that's how it is when you have a vocation like mine and DH'sp.
I spoke to a neighbour of mine today, he and his wife appear to be having a lovely relaxing paid holiday at the moment due to their situation (sorry I know that doesnt apply to all but he gave the distinct impression they have very little to do).
Quite frankly my DH and I are probably about to have the most difficult year of our lives ahead of us. If somebody came up to me in the street and accused my husband and I of abusing the emergency childcare at the moment because he WFH I would be livid. You might want to consider that and whether it's worth your saying something.
You never know what is going on in people's lives.

Who sends their kids to school/childcare during a pandemic if they dont need to? They are risking their kids so they can do their vital job (whatever that is). And you are judging them?

How bloody judgmental OP! You have no idea what that family’s situation is.

Someone I know is parent to an adopted child (teenager). He is, at times, very violent towards her. So far she has kept him at home during the lockdown but the violence is escalating, probably as a result of being cooped up indoors. Being adopted he is classed as a look after child and as such she is entitled to send him to school. She has resisted so far but now feels that some time apart is imperative to help reduce his aggression. She is not a key worker and while her son is at school she will be doing some diy and taking some time to relax.

Time to move your desk from the window OP and concentrate on your own affairs instead of interfering in other people’s I think

Both my boys are asthmatic and the gp advises against sending them to school
I’m a key worker home working with them
Both x

Personally i think your wasting your time watching what your neighbour is doing, we are ALL in this virus nightmare together, so we should show more love toward friends and neighbours, social distancing of being first rule.
Dont give yourself anxiety over something that really doesnt concern you, you are not virus control, I get it, you want everyone to take heed of the restrictions we've been set, but dont be a spy, wages are rubbish
Lordbless

If the nursery is taking the children every day its for a valid reason.

Why are you trying to police people....thats what the police are for!!

My son is autistic and I have been offered a place for him so I can continue working but lucky for me my DH and DD can manage while I work so we can all stay in and safe.

My Mum is a medical journalist and working her butt off in her home

Mind your business

Our son has an EHCP and was turned away from his school even though he is allowed to attend and had a place. We are both WFH and home schooling him and it's at struggle as he needs constant attention.

How is this an essential worker???

ilovemydog hundreds of thousands are having to go on the Job Retention Scheme otherwise they’ll be laid off with no income. The scheme doesn’t run itself by magic, someone has to do it. Have a look at this.
www.businesssupport.gov.uk/coronavirus-job-retention-scheme/

Two friends of mine who ate mental health nurses are working from home doing phone assessments. She could be a key worker.

I’m a teacher my husband is a teacher we have to go to work, we are doing everything in our power not to send our child into school- As teachers we are at risk - less so obs then nhs workers - but still we would prefer not to have to go to work so sending our child to school is even more of a worry. I cannot honestly understand why your neighbour is if they (or even one parent) is at home not matter what the needs of the children may be and tbh why the school aren’t questioning it. However you can’t do anything so try not to stress about it.... maintain strong social distancing!

Not all work from home key worker roles are possible with children around. I am a community mental health nurse and could not conduct my role from home with my 2 year old around. I am making sensitive and confidential calls all day and a person suffering with mental illness needs to feel safe and secure when disclosing their struggles. Having my child around would mean I was distracted and it would also be upsetting to the patient who may be suffering with paranoia etc so hearing me respond to my child mid conversation might cause them distress and exaggerate symptoms.
I think you should concentrate on your work and knowing you are doing what is expected of you. Comparison to others is never helpful because we never know the whole story.

• exacerbate symptoms

Parents have to have a valid reason to be sending them to nursery at the moment and this has to be proven to the nursery before care is offered.

DH and I are both WFH, DH is a key worker, if he doesn't do his job the wheels in motion will stop, although he isn't front line obviously. We have our DC home as they're teenagers and although I'm working, I'm not a KW.

Just go about your own day, contrary to your belief, no one needs your opinion.

Social workers are currently WFH when they can.

I think it will be nice if we can just mind our own business & let others mind theirs as well at this time instead of taking paracetamol for another persons headaches. People are passing through difficult times @ this time, some are very stressful. That Neighbour of yours may be in that situation.

And pls let's have some respect when dealing with others in this group we don't have to insult others because they asked a question or make a comment.
Let us be our brother/ sister's keeper. & pray for one another.
God will hear our prayers & heal the whole world again.

Maybe like you OP she works from home but as a key worker, but unlike you her job requires real concentration and doesn’t allow for time spent curtain twitching and neighbour judging.