Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I’ve been named and ‘shamed’

854 replies

EstuaryBird · 03/04/2020 09:32

Admittedly it’s only on our local WhatsApp group...

Opened it this morning and there’s a message from a ‘founder’ member of the group.

“Me, hubs and the kids were out last night making lots of noise for our NHS heroes. Disappointed to see that some of this group don’t care enough to give up 2 minutes of their time!!! Maybe you forgot..(then a list of names including mine). Will be sending you a reminder next week!!”

I know she’s a twat but I’m fuming. I’m not going to dignify it with a reply because she and her little crew of followers love a public war. I’m just going to ignore her but if she thinks she’s forcing me out next week she’s got another bloody think coming.

Tbh if I wasn’t on lockdown I wouldn’t even give it 2 thoughts but I’m winding myself up about it now!

AIBU to think that clapping is not compulsory and nobody else’s business?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
8
MarthasGinYard · 03/04/2020 11:10

'"Me, hubs and the kids were out last night making lots of noise for our NHS heroes. Disappointed to see that some of this group don’t care enough to give up 2 minutes of their time!!! Maybe you forgot..(then a list of names including mine). Will be sending you a reminder next week!!”

I'd reply

Awww bless you Sister Anna

TemoraryUsername · 03/04/2020 11:10

I'm so glad that if there IS a WA group for my neighbourhood, I'm not in it Hmm

Honestly, how fucking awful to name and shame. Did she do the same if you we caught not Wearing a Poppy with Pride, too?

I do it and I don't vote Tory, and my Tory voting relatives do it too. Like anything it is much more complicated than "you're a hypocrite if you voted X way" or "you're shameful if you don't clap" or "clapping is pointless" - there are many stories of healthcare workers being a bit cheered up by hearing it, and that's enough to make it worthwhile to me.

I'm totally taking a pan and spoon next time though, genius!

ChristmasCarcass · 03/04/2020 11:11

HollowTalk most probably they have just come off nights, stayed up during the day to reset their body clocks, and gone to bed early. I used to try to stay up till 6pm after a nightshift.

Though admittedly I would then have been so deeply asleep that even an air horn wouldn’t have woken me.

FNuts · 03/04/2020 11:11

Tell her she can politely go get herself a dose of the clap

TerrorWig · 03/04/2020 11:12

What an absolute knobber she sounds!

I would leave the group. I have been known to cut off my nose to spite my face though WinkGrin

FilthyforFirth · 03/04/2020 11:13

'Put your money where your clap is' is senstational and I would definitely send that with a link to an NHS fundraiser!

Willing to bet so many of these manic clappers didnt vote for parties that actually want to properly fund the NHS either.

BelleharePenguin09 · 03/04/2020 11:13

Oh god. Imagine anyone using the “word” hubs.
Yuck.

Pinkandwhiteblossom · 03/04/2020 11:13

What kind of person does that! I think your response was perfect OP.

I live on a long London street and I say about half were out last night. Horses for courses.

I bet she panic bought OP. And is now throwing out all of her out of date food!

ellendegeneres · 03/04/2020 11:14

Pleeeeease do a slow sarcastic clap as you go past her house for your walk! Staring in at her windows! Do it every time you go for a walk 😂😂

Kitcat47 · 03/04/2020 11:14

What's wrong with people. She is a moron! Delete yourself from group x

TwinkleLightsRubberDucks · 03/04/2020 11:15

Haha, so glad it's not just me that's been 'called out'.

A neighbour, who I've only ever known to say hello to before this, text (we all exchanged numbers when we went into lockdown) me last night asking why I had not been outside clapping. Apparently I really should do so to show support for the NHS and do I want a reminder from her next week.

I responded to her and politely declined her offer of a reminder and explained that my frontline NHS (ECA on the ambulances) DH had been at work doing an almost 14 hour shift, he was off nearly 2 hours late and he NEVER gets off on time anyway, had fallen asleep on the sofa and I didn't want to wake him. Our house is a very small terraced house and the sofa he was asleep on is right next to the door. I also explained to her that neither I or DH enjoy the virtue signalling from certain people around the clapping for the NHS.

As a PP said, do it if you want to show support for the NHS but don't if you're going to use it was an excuse to show how mush more perfect you think you are and then try to shame others when they, for whatever reason, decide not to or are unable to.

She's read the message but not responded yet.

IStressheadI · 03/04/2020 11:15

What an arsehole she is!

I didn't clap. The whole thing makes me kind of annoyed. My area is broadly Tory. I don't think you should clap if you voted for a party that has been blatantly trying to destroy the NHS for years. Our doctors and nurses needed our gratitude when it was time for them to get funding.

Also I was pumping breastmilk when it happened so I wouldn't want to alarm the neighbours anyway! Grin

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 03/04/2020 11:16

I don't know if you're anywhere near beautiful Saltburn, but even so, tell her that you've reported her to the Daily Mail secret police journalists and they've scheduled a visit for next Thursday to come and take a picture of her standing outside her door and pretending to showing community spirit, to star as the next 'face' of their mindless, errant and bullying 'Look at these selfish CO-VIDIOTS' feature.

willdoitinaminute · 03/04/2020 11:16

I’m afraid I’ve never followed the crowd. Total cynic and always devils advocate so clapping for the NHS at this point seems a little premature.
PS I work for the NHS but currently can’t work because we are deemed ultra high risk so waiting for redeployment. Don’t believe a word the press says the NHS management still can’t manage their way out of a paper bag. Most of the emergency measures have been clinically led the only job management have been tasked with is buying PPE and they can’t even do that.

strawberry2017 · 03/04/2020 11:16

So I work for the NHS and I didn't go and clap, I put my daughter to bed and then sat with the terrified dog because people were setting off fire works. DH was dispatching ambulances at the time so he also didn't clap.
However as nice as it was last week I don't believe it should be a weekly thing, I think the best way for people to support the NHS is that when this is all over and done with that they continue to treat it with respect it's receiving now and not abuse the system as has been happening for years!
So all the people who take the piss out of the ambulance service, A+E, doctors appointments etc need to learn from this,
But let's face it, once corona is a distant memory we will be back to the 6 hour waiting times, the regular callers to the ambulance service and the people who like to waste doctors appointments in no time at all.
Which means we will be back to the none stop bitching about the NHS.

MarieIVanArkleStinks · 03/04/2020 11:16

Once is a warmhearted, lovely gesture. Twice and it begins to resemble the ever-decreasing purity spiral (and at that point, isn't exactly going to win hearts and minds because most people recognize this for the hypocritical BS it is). A really irritating thing about the CV19 pandemic - as if there weren't already enough - is that it's brought the prefects out in force. These annoying fuckers for some reason think they can give themselves authority to police others' behaviour.

Stay in that group and you're giving them carte blanche to do just that. Leave the group.

turnandfacethenamechange · 03/04/2020 11:16

Pleeeeease do a slow sarcastic clap as you go past her house for your walk! Staring in at her windows! Do it every time you go for a walk

Yes Grin

Tootletum · 03/04/2020 11:18

Reply with a link the the crowdfunder for the NHS.

MissEliza · 03/04/2020 11:19

God I hate that kind of person. She's probably the type who virtue signals in her social media with things like 'be kind' while bitching and gossiping in real life. As pp said she's probably the type who panic bought as well.
We have someone like that on our local Facebook group. She tries to make out she's charitable and community minded but was outed last week for selling hand sanitizer for 5x the price on EBay!

LoisWilkersonslastnerve · 03/04/2020 11:19

Uppity twat. Glad someone told her to go fuck herselfGrin

JustHereWithMyPopcorn · 03/04/2020 11:20

Our village FB page is full of competitive clapping posts, it's such virtue signalling BS. I have several friends and three member of my family who work for the NHS, my sister currently working a 60 hour week and she is happy for people to just stay at home.

The whole area here is true blue so it actually makes me slightly sick to see this display from people who voted to allow for the NHS to be crippled by this government.

diddl · 03/04/2020 11:22

Won't it just become meaningless the more it goes on?

It is scary though that some people are fussed enough to check up on these things & report them to others.

Surely with the intention that others will frown on Op?

Wat other motive could there be?

Chloemol · 03/04/2020 11:22

I would just comment, please don’t bully me, you don’t know my circumstances. You have really upset me and I am now leaving this group. And lleave it

Four4me · 03/04/2020 11:23

I am a keyworker, I was at home and went out last week to clap.
Last night I'd just got home from a horribly long knackering day and if I'm honest the clapping made me feel anxious.
Totally appreciate the sentiment, definitely shouldn't be shamed into it!
👍🏼

Scoobydoobywho · 03/04/2020 11:25

Respond with 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏

Swipe left for the next trending thread