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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

No children allowed in supermarket

678 replies

flashbac · 25/03/2020 11:52

My sister went to Tesco with her toddler and was told no children allowed from next week. Understand this is wise for infection control but what if you're a single parent with tiny kids and can't do online shopping?

OP posts:
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5
LeniSpring · 27/03/2020 10:50

How does a mum with 3 children aged let’s say 4 6 and 8 hold all their hands and still shop.

How does a mum with say a 4 year old simply leave them at home!?

LeniSpring · 27/03/2020 10:56

Children should not be allowed out AT ALL. yesx no fresh air or exercise outside for young children is great.

Kbeeb1992 · 27/03/2020 11:10

Amispeakingenglish... r you for fucking real iive alone with my two kids two and nine so im not supposed to take them out for a walk and some fresh air as is allowed!? And what am I supposed to do when i need shopping? Leave them in the house by themselves or leave them in the car and then also get judged or told off ! Eveyone is just trying there best to do everything we are supposed to and yes that means some people do not have a choice other than to take the kids to the shops , its actually unbelievable that anyone could even say that kids shouldnt go out at all!

amispeakingenglish · 27/03/2020 14:19

Kbeeb199 You might be a responsible parent but many aren't and do not keep the children away. They are asymptomatic when they have it so can infect people. I, like many others are now thinking a complete lock down is the only way. Its always the few who spoil it for the many, the few who can't keep the correct distance or abuse the current rules. It must be hard with small children, but perhaps sit them in the trolley if they fit? Or a home delivery. I am sure you must have stocked up for a while as many have. Perhaps shops could include those such as yourself on the priority home delivery list, I heard they had one??

Waxonwaxoff0 · 27/03/2020 14:24

@amispeakingenglish there are no bloody home delivery slots at the moment. Do you really think everyone, especially single parents can afford to "stock up?"

I live in a flat with no garden so I am 100% taking DS out for some fresh air and exercise, away from other people. I am not forcing him to stay inside until this is over.

BeetrootRocks · 27/03/2020 14:24

' It must be hard with small children, but perhaps sit them in the trolley if they fit?'

This is about children being banned from supermarkets full stop.

Maybe try home delivery! Yeah like no one will have thought of that. How stupid do you think single parents are, exactly.

cologne4711 · 27/03/2020 14:29

Not sure how anyone can do any shopping full stop now. No delivery slots, no click and collect slots and long queues outside to get into an actual store.

I could be in and out in 5 minutes if I just wanted to buy a couple of things but people doing a full shop are going to be in there for at least half an hour - and then you have the people who just faff and could be there an hour. How long are people in the queues for?

Hoggleludo · 27/03/2020 15:08

@lilmishap

Mine children both have birthdays too

We've just said. We can't get you anything now. But when this is over we will get you presents. They are young. Disappointed but weirdly. They do understand. It's hard xx

Wannabangbang · 27/03/2020 15:11

There isn't any slots for no one now. I've tried getting one for my vunerable mother at all 6 of the major supermarkets i cannot get one let alone for myself. And i can't help her if i can't get shopping. Im basically wasting a fortune shopping at the local shop as i can't carry it any further and they will only let me have one of each thing leaving me unable to buy for her too.
The whole coronavirus situation is dire enough without single parents being able to get much needed food at an affordable price.

Rosebel · 27/03/2020 15:21

The queuing is bad. My husband was there before opening and had to wait over an hour to enter the store. Are your children really going to wait patiently for an hour or more? Plus have to walk round the shop not being allowed to touch anything or move from their parents side.
That's not about single parents either just a general question. There were a few mum's and a dad there who had children and they were allowed in. So I still don't think it's a policy but perhaps all stores have different policies?

LillyJean1 · 27/03/2020 15:24

I actually cannot beleive what I have read on this!! How ignorant of some people.

Don't take your kids to the supermarket? 'where is dad?' Well...

My children are 1 and 12. Dad?? Isn't on the scene for now as I was fleeing a domestic abuse situation. So... Should I just casually call him and ask him to do my shopping for me? 1. Because that would break the social distancing rule. 2. He wouldn't do it. 3. Another chance for him to control me?

That's only my situation... There are plenty in other justifiable situation as to why they could leave children alone or ask the other parent.

Both my parent are by medicals requested to self isolate for 12 weeks which means no contact with anyone.

Delivery slots, there are none!

I will be taking my children. Or at least my youngest 1 year old to the supermarket as the eldest is able to stay on the car. I don't use the trolleys for obvious reasons. I use his buggy, he doesn't leave his buggy and I place a basket under the buggy to try to reduce any contamination.

As for keeping kids inside. I take both on a walk daily and also play in our garden. Mentally we all need this. Some people are frightfully ignorant to other people's situation.

They are all unique. What happened to uniting and supporting one another.

LillyJean1 · 27/03/2020 15:26

Oh and no!! I did not stockpile when everyone else did because I actually couldn't afford to stock pile!! So I NEED to go to the supermarkets for essentials.

galaxybuttons · 27/03/2020 16:32

I had to take my teenager with me this week to do a seperate shop for my 80 year old parents AND me - due to restrictions on food items I can't shop for my household and theirs at the same time, and I'm a single parent. More thought needs to be given by supermarkets.......

bemusedmoose · 27/03/2020 17:18

Nice one! No online deliveries and now I can't even pick stuff up... Jeeze, I'm sorry I'm the only parent that bothered to raise my kids, now I get repaid with not allowed in store.. Wth!??!

Kbeeb1992 · 27/03/2020 18:07

No i didnt stockpile because im not selfish and have continued to do my normal shop to leave things for everyone else, although its very hard to do a normal shop now as there is still nothing on the shelves, surely people have enough pasta by now..?

Dieu · 27/03/2020 18:18

Stick to smaller shops. They won't have any such restrictions in place, and they're usually better stocked. Less stress all round.
WineThanks

BeetrootRocks · 27/03/2020 18:24

Smaller shops are often more expensive and single parents are more likely to be in poverty.

The good news is this is IOM only AFAIK and in general shops aren't banning children completely. Although the poster upthread with a , can't remember. Think 6 yo and 19 yo with SEN who was told to leave one of them in the car, that's shit.

Ferret27 · 28/03/2020 01:26

I don’t usually work in a supermarket ..but have been supporting colleagues to fill up the shelves ...I will be doing this for the next few weeks months .... it is a nightmare trying to fill shelves with couples,flatsharers, toddlers crowding down one aisle.... being a single parent does not mean that you could not ask a neighbour, local charity or one of the many support groups that have sprung up to help out...
It is scary how many shoppers are treating this as the normal get out of the house shopping trip, it’s not! please try and look at other alternatives and then only bring kids if you really have to, if too many shop staff go sick or refuse to work because they don’t feel safe more branches will close and you won’t have so much choice( shop workers have kids too, many are single mums)

Ferret27 · 28/03/2020 01:37

Ps ... Everyone I know has had leaflets dropped in by neighbours saying if you are vulnerable need support with food drop offs reach out....or ring your local store directly and explain your circumstances...( I know of many amazing stories where shop workers have organised drop offs etc ..do not go into a store if you should be isolating... please ... you may pass this virus on and be responsible for spreading it to other families...

Purpleclownsuit · 28/03/2020 05:14

ask a neighbour, local charity or one of the many support groups that have sprung up to help out

And if you live somewhere with no kind neighbours and where the support groups are inundated or none existent? Nothing through the door round here and no support groups set up.

I think people forget how isolated some people are and how it is actually possible to have NO ONE to ask for help.

I’m so bored of this “you must find a way, everyone has a way!” type of bollocks. No. Some people really don’t!

confused1456 · 28/03/2020 07:30

I agree @Purpleclownsuit some just do not have a way. I have two very young daughters and have had no offers of support from any neighbours or members of the community. I feel completely isolated in this and quite frankly terrified for myself and my daughters.

Fivefourthree · 28/03/2020 08:00

@purple and @Purpleclownsuit please do go on facebook and look for local groups. I've seen many requests for help and some very lovely people replying.
The NHS volunteering service is also rolling out this week so it's looking brighter all the time.
Local to me a lady was unable to go out for her medication, and couldn't get hold of the pharmacy that deliver it, and someone went to the pharmacy to sort it out for her.
That's only one example.
Really hope you would get a similar response Flowers

ScreamedAtTheMichelangelo · 28/03/2020 09:09

On the one hand if some stores are implementing this, then I’d get why. I’ve been to Aldi three times in the last 3 weeks and on every occasion, kids have been running loose, grabbing things, parents nowhere to be seen. Last time, a kid of about 9 leaned across his dad in the check out and started turning over my items to look at them. Not a word from dad. If some stores are going nuclear, it’s because of these people.

On the other hand, banning single parents from a store is far too draconian. So, what? Only obedient children or parents with sense? The 9 year old and his dad could have been asked to leave, in theory, but by then we were in the check out and realistically shops don’t want to call the police over things like that. So I really do get why the stores are struggling. Kids’ behaviour is often so poor and so widespread that the only way of achieving the aim in a public health emergency is to refuse them access full stop.

Like I said, I don’t agree with it and I hope it doesn’t become a thing, but I see why it’s come to this.

midnightstar66 · 28/03/2020 09:56

I went to Tesco last night with DC. No one batted an eyelid at them being with me. In any case they were a damn sight more mindful and respectful of others space than the majority of adults both in the store and on the walk there. I left feeling quite angry that people were just swanning around like normal squeezing past others instead of waiting back a second

FelicisNox · 28/03/2020 11:10

I can't imagine many supermarkets will adopt this approach as it's just idiotic.