To start a Cf of the past thread?

[PrincessHoneysuckle]

Not so many cf posts nowadays what with Corona.
Ill start:

A few years ago I came home from work to find my garden full of workmen and a fallen tree.Cf ndn had cut her tree down into my garden without asking/giving me the heads up and my garden looked like an episode of Groundforce I realised it had snapped my washing line too.

amazing!

Some of the CF stories are just plain criminal though?

LolaDarkdestroyer you are kidding aren't you??

When my daughter was about 8, she played outside with the little girl next door. They made camps at the side of our garages (all parking and garages are behind the houses). They always played well together, and we could ALWAYS hear them, so the other mum and I let them get on with it. Big mistake. It turned out they weren’t making camps, they were climbing over the 6’ back gate of the house next door but one (next door to the other girl) and playing on their trampoline, the minute the other family went out. They got caught red handed in the end, and obviously didn’t do it again, but what tiny CFs.

I know that we were neglectful mothers, but we learnt then that our daughters weren’t to be trusted, especially if it sounds as though they're playing nicely.

Obviously Mexican house thief was the absolute ultimate but I was also fond of the CF who thought she could come back to the house she had sold and strip the gooseberry bush, the group of YA’s in the ski chalet and esp the neighbour who used the pool despite the old owner (who allowed it) having sold up and moved!

This is no where near as good as others. However, we lived in a close of semi detached and had a house back directly behind us. Most neighbours were pretty friendly but didn't really know these as it was quite a way round. They had ivy for years which wrecked the fence and our shed. One day I go out for a cheeky cog and they have taken the fence panels out. Nothing was said and about a week later one of them shouts that sorry about the gaping hole just waiting for panels to come. No idea why they took them out weeks before but hey ho. Feel very exposed but carry on and stop the small person from escaping. One day I'm making lunch and all of a sudden there is an almighty thump and scream. The fence panels had come but instead of waiting for his son or asking my hubby he decided to try and put these huge great panels in he has lifted it but of course trying to left a seven foot panel seven feet into the air to get it in the posts has backfired on him and he was not stretch Armstrong like he clearly thought he was. He's fallen straight onto the concrete plinth backwards and is writhing about our garden screaming in pain. I come running and his wife is there saying oh he's fine just winded himself. I find out later she's an alchy and doesn't like anyone involved in their business. I had to phone an ambulance and then ended up sitting in the kitchen for an hour waiting as she made it clear she didn't want us in our own garden while waiting for the ambulance. Didn't know what to do. He got carted off, I was convinced he'd broken his back if not at the minimum ribs. Heard or saw nothing for weeks. Then one day the fence panel was in with his son but to add insult to injury, we had a new shed which we painted cream and was really pretty was hanging washing out just after the panels went in and they had painted the back of our shed bloody horrible green to blend in with there new fence.

Lady down the road used to sign her kids up to all kinds of activities like football, Cubs or Brownies, all clubs my 3 attended, but she didn't drive so it was a 10-15 minute walk. It was a small and safe village so kids of all ages would walk unaccompanied and these kids were plenty old enough! She used to tell her kids to get in my car when I was picking up my own children. The kids though were absolutely obnoxious. Really rude and disrespectful and I only knew their mother on a polite "Good morning" when passing on the street.

I'd get to the club venue and they'd walk up to me and say in a voice and attitude reminiscent of Veruca Salt from Charlie and the Chocolate factory, "Mum says you have to drive us home" and then just got into my car! I then had to spend five minutes pissing about putting seats up in the boot (7 seater) because my two kids, the two CFer kids and the best friend of DD who I HAD offered to pick up needed to be able to fit. Dropping them home also meant a detour because you had to enter the road from another to get to their house, turn around and go all the way back the other way to mine. She didn't want them walking through the pedestrian alleyway that connected the street, apparently.

DD couldn't stand them and started refusing to be picked up with them. She ended up walking home often and then getting stressed because they followed her and walked with her and her mates. Instead I started making up excuses about not going straight home and the CFer's kids would have to walk. I even put empty boxes in my car for a few weeks. I did try telling their mum that I had never agreed to it and it didn't work for me but she pulled the disabled card and tried to guilt me by saying she would have to go and pick them up on foot and it would take her a very long time and she hoped it wouldn't make her collapse. She didn't seem to mind them walking alone when my kids weren't attending or I had other driving plans!

Thank the gods she moved!

My ex best friend was a professional CF. She'd complain the minute she got somewhere to get a freebie/upgrade. We once went out to eat and she didn't like the restaurant table layout. So she rearranged the whole lot. The staff even ended up helping.

She used to turn up at my house at 7am with her baby still half asleep in a sleepsuit, plonk the poor bugger in my DD highchair and make breakfast from my cupboards. She'd then outstay her welcome massively, stay until 8pm, I'd end up feeding her dinner as well. It wasn't like she was poor or hungry. I'd be exhausted by the end of it.

A woman I vaguely know through a class my DC attend asked me if I'd lend her £1.5k so she and her husband could book a holiday and it wasn't their payday for another two weeks. She got the hump when I said no and hasn't spoken to me since.

@fourquenelles he looks so smug!

My CF colleague (not actually friend) asked if I’d take on her £30k debt racked up on credit cards so she could get a mortgage. She’d been declined on the basis she couldn’t afford the repayments, when I asked her how the repayment on the debt would be covered she said she’d expected I’d just pay the minimum on it until she could afford the repayment again and she’d ‘take it back’.

Absolute gall. We still work together but she doesn’t really speak, she did get the house in the end but I’m not sure who was stupid enough to take her debt on.

Does anyone remember the thread that went something like this..
The poster lived in a flat that had access to a garden area, she came home to find her neighbour who didn’t have access to the private garden had had a patio door installed and was essentially planning on using the garden too?

I always wonder what happened in the end??

I think that turned out to be a troll

Any more? This just killed a half hour and what fabulous cf'ers

@Moorethemerrier The OP had to move out as a load bearing internal wall collapsed due to MASSIVE renovations taking place in the flat next door. As far as MN could tell I don't believe they thought she was a Troll.

She didn't come back as she was now going through legal channels.

DH's family are cfers.
His daughter lives over 100 miles away. She never rings and we hardly ever see her. She conveniently forgets her dad's birthday and fathers day.
She rings dp and asks him to be guarantor on a loan for her boyfriend( who we had only met twice) so he could buy a van. Errr nope.

Same contact scenario with DP's sister who is a real horrible bitch.
After 8 years of not bothering with do she rings him up and wants a loan of a few thousand. It's said that a refusal can offend and this case it sure did The cheeky cow was outraged that he wouldn't give her the money

Not as bad by far as some on here, but my old neighbour was a nightmare

My favourite with him was when he phoned the council noise complaints team to report me because my cat made his dogs bark.

He still tells people in the village he had to move because of how noisy we were, and a lot of people initially believe him because I have 6 kids, but he is so outraged still that the council woman sniggered on one of his calls that he often goes into a rant so thankfully they realise he's batshit. He rang them a dozen times or so trying to get them to take the problem seriously and complained to councillors and the local MP. All he succeeded in doing was getting another neighbour to complain about him and the noisy dogs.

At one point even sent me a letter, recorded delivery, advising me that I was "legally required to stop my cat tormenting his animals". All my 19 year old cat was doing was sleeping in my garden.

I think it’s harassment when neighbours keep phoning the councils on folks, they should be charged with harassment when they keep doing it, they have vendettas against some folks and I genuinely believe some people just cannot stand having neighbours, it’s ridiculous but I believe it to be true.

Another CF I know...not as bad as some but still...

I used to work with this woman that can only be described as not quite right and she had a very strange view on what a friend is, unfortunately for me then she seen me as a friend even though I couldn’t stand her, she could sense that I didn’t have any time for her yet she kept trying and trying to be my mate, anyway she didn’t have a phone with the internet on it and one day whilst I was going on a fag break she asked if she could use my phone to check her Facebook and I said a flat out “can you fuck as it’s private and has my whole life on it”, cue a major dirty look and a sulk, she replied “it’s not like it will cost you anything since your wired up to the works WiFi” I so wanted to punch her right in the face, she missed the point again!

Same woman again...I used to buy magazines every week, on a Tuesday it was the celeb mags and on a Thursday it was Take A Break, Chat, etc, etc, I used to take them into work every Friday so I had something to read when we were quiet, anyway after a few weeks of doing this then I got fed up of it because everyone would want to read them after me and some even did the crosswords without asking me, which alone makes lots of CFerism, and to be fair i didn’t like many people at that work so I stopped bringing the mags in, I was also paying for them all and yet everyone was reading them for free, no I didn’t like that, anyway one Sunday I bought whichever newspaper it was that you get the magazine in and said woman seen it sticking out of my bag and asked to read it when she knew I hadn’t yet and I said no, she went to the boss about it and as he thought she was a pain in the arse also then he asked me to “please let her read it as she will do my head in about it” and that just made me all the more determined not to give in to her as she would think that she should just get her own way all the time if I gave in to her (yes like a 5 year old) and needless to say I got dirty looks all day long! God I still hate that woman, most folks wouldn’t bother trying to be friends with someone when they knew the person didn’t like them, she used to drive me crazy and I’m not a violent person but I pushed her once right out of the locker room and I was going to punch her but she started shouting on the boss.

Your magazine story reminded me of someone in a school I worked in who complained that “Mary” always got to take the leftover cakes home to her family when we had them on the last Friday of the month or end of term or whatever.

She complained repeatedly to the Head and caused such bad feeling that Mary stopped baking her amazing cakes for everyone

Got new fence panels as ours were knackered, went out and came home to find the ones on the side connecting with our Ndn garden replaced with old ones and when we looked, our new ones had been put on the other side of the neighbors garden and swapped with the panels from that side.

Turned out that she felt our new fence made her house look like the scruffy one to the other neighbors and so had moved the new panels to the side of her garden facing the street.

When dh asked for them to be put back again, she tried to argue that we didn’t need nice panels for the internal fence because “no one can see it anyway”, that it she didn’t need new center fencing but had wanted the side replaced and accused us of deliberately trying to make her look scruffy and poor to the street.
In the end dh went and got them back and she stopped talking to us- win/ win imo

@lyralalala yeah your colleagues sounded very much like the pain in the arse at my work, such a brass neck, the woman I know had zero friends at all and even her own family couldn’t be bothered with her, there was something very wrong with her.

Sorry colleague

There is loads of CF from my in-laws but quite outing so I will stick to an amusing one from my old cat.
My Mum had just come in from shopping and bought a prawn sandwich for her lunch. Unlike me she doesn’t eat them out of the packet and puts it on a plate. I rang her when she had just put the sandwich on a plate and we spoke on the phone for a few mins. Literally a minute later she rings me back pissing herself laughing. My CF cat had sort of opened the sandwich and ate the prawns but the bread was back down. So on first glance it looked untouched. Clever little shit 🤣🤣🤣🤣

My company use to pay for drinks for everyone at the local pub every Friday afternoon. One employee wanted the company to pay for everyone's taxi fare home as it was unsafe to drink and drive. He whinged and made it a Health & safety issue (even though he could have ordered soft drinks) so the company stopped doing it and saved the money instead.

And not only did we miss out on free drinks but we had to work till 5pm.