Over 200 toilet rolls in my yoga lounge

[LonelyAngel]

I know we mustn't panic buy, but my two children, Jocasta and Oliver, simply must come first. I couldn't bear to think of them struggling in the weeks and months ahead without toilet roll, so yes, we did stock up. Plenty of dried pasta too, but the artisan variety, not supermarket stodge. Oliver wants to make a play fort out of the rolls, and Jocasta is thinking about turning them into a portrait of Greta Thunberg, but I have explained the importance of them and they have been very mature about it. The thing is, my friend who is a single mum (she lives on the local council estate but is actually quite intelligent) has told me she cannot get a single loo roll for her 3 kids (all under 5). I feel for her but I don't want to share, because Jocasta and Oliver simply must come first. Am I being unreasonable?

Thanks for clarifying that one! Couldn't work out the typo so thought you may be having a very fun (if not slightly uncomfortable) quarantine!

Quarantine is such an ugly word.

I prefer temporary withdrawal from arranged things. TWAT for short.

I think we all know it’s meant to be tongue in cheek - but it’s really not funny. Imagine I posted a tongue in cheek thread about stockpiling chicken nuggets, chips etc for little Chardonnay and co. I’d be ripped to shreds but this reverse snobbery is fine. Ok then.

Your mistake was in naming your dc’s Op - how many families can there be with an Oliver and Jocasta and a yoga den?
Now all the council estate lot will be raiding your house with baseball bats

I prefer temporary withdrawal from arranged things. TWAT for short

Is that a commonly said phrase that I've never heard of up to now, or did you make it up by yourself? Either way, I'm impressed, genuinely. I'm going to use it myself.

I take her humour as taking the piss out of the White Middle Class

Exactly. But it's probably a little close to home for those who don't find it amusing.

ChardonnaysPetDragon

Excellent, stealing it!

Yabu.

Surely you could have got artisan lavatory tissue with works of art on them.

Or black satin glittered squares for the butler to wipe your rears with.

Poor show.

If you can't make fun of selfish for buying all the toilet tissue, whom can you laugh at?

Exactly cacaca, especially if you dropped in a sneer about Persephone and Barnaby and their parents having family japes in toilet roll play dens.

Ahem!

All mine!

It’s defo tongue in cheek. Real poshos would never have a lounge. Yoga would be done in the garden studio. With underfloor heating ofc. And Oliver is far too common, Arlo or Felix would have been more appropriate

HAHA!

You ok Hun?

I thought it was funny, OP.

Would these keyboard warriors tell other people to "go fuck themselves" in real life, even if they don't find your satirical post amusing? How impolite.

I think we all know it’s meant to be tongue in cheek - but it’s really not funny. Imagine I posted a tongue in cheek thread about stockpiling chicken nuggets, chips etc for little Chardonnay and co. I’d be ripped to shreds but this reverse snobbery is fine. Ok then.

Well yes, you would be. Because you would most likely be mocking those who are less well off/(potentially)less educated/struggling more than you are. Can you not see the difference?

I just think whilst lots of people are stressing about either having lost, potentially going to lose or dealing with being isolated from elderly parents etc, jobs being lost, operations being cancelled just to mention a few, it’s hardly the time for sarcastic jokes. It would be a bit like standing up in the middle of a funeral and sprouting a joke out. Some of us may well not see the disastrous side of all of this because they are lucky enough to be in a relatively good position. But for many others it’s horrendous. Maybe between friends but not out there irrespective of people’s personal positions.

Christ.

Well I found the OP amusing 🤷‍♂️

@LonelyAngel thank you for trying to make light of the situation we're in - ignore all the negatives Nellies not getting the joke!!

Letty it would be really weird to stand up in real life and deliver this joke word for word as it's written here 😂 so yes my reaction would be the same, but I'd add 'oddball' to my response.

Has anybody made the 'I sent my husband out for loo rolls, and he came back with 100 bread rolls' joke yet?

Thank you very much for that reasoned contribution. Now I have a little boy in tears asking me what "fuck off" and "shit" means.

Jesus wept. Not only no sense of humour but no reading comprehension either. OP is doing the exact opposite of taking the piss out of poor people

This.

@HalfTermHalfTerm so why is is acceptable to mock someone perceived to be better off than you? It’s really not is it?

Not funny at all. It's not a class problem and you sound bitter.

Why is your little boy crying if he doesn't know what those words mean?