Sex and showers

[croissant2]

NC. Husband showers once a day, in the evening. He refuses to have sex with me after he's had a shower, because he doesn't want to get sweaty and dirty after showering. Apparently showering again is out of the question.

I don't want to have sex with him before he showers, because he wants foreplay and I don't fancy going 'down there' after he's been almost 24 hours without a shower. If I try and have sex with him after he's had a shower, he says I'm only doing it because he's clean now.

I shower morning and evening, and don't like foreplay on myself unless I've recently washed.

This all sounds so ridiculous but sex has become a rare occurrence because of this. Not sure if I'm being OCD and unreasonable or if he is?

YABU just for saying “am I being a bit OCD”. OCD is an incredibly distressing and disabling condition and recognition of that is not helped by casual throwaway references.

I also wonder if there's something else going on. But personally it'd be no BJ without shower here.

@DustyMaiden

He is being unreasonable

He is being unreasonable

Nay lass! just stupid! Most all men with the prospect of a shag and a BJ would almost kill let alone have shower!

I'd agree that something else may be amiss here as it is quite unusual for a loving couple to be this entrenched about sex-shower order.

That being said - I am with you OP re: no BJ without shower. We usually have showers evening and morning but in case we skip one it is an unspoken rule that no one will be going 'south'. Sex can still happen though, going 'south' is not necessary for good foreplay and sex.

So I take it you never have sex more than once a day then? He’s being really weird.

He’s being really weird about showering. Why can’t he have nice, fresh sex with you post his evening shower, then hop in the shower for a few minutes in the morning?

@DustyMaiden that's so funny. How did you explain that to your relatives 😂😂

I don't think he wants to have sex with you. If he did, he'd wash so it was nice for you and wash again after if that's what he likes.

My DH and I feel like we're old and serious now that we both want to shower/wash before sex.

We also wash after. Hah. Never used to care.

If one of us showers/baths before bedtime then we assume it's because they want sex.

My DH would be in the shower faster than you can say blow job if sex was suggested
Mine too. Yanbu even 24 hours of not washing can cause a stinky penis, I wouldn't go there either.
DP always showers before sex, it is much better when comfortable and clean no risk of breathing in any pissy smells or poo particles. 🤢
It takes 1 min for a nan to shower.

I agree with emerald. I think most men would do anything with the promise of sex.

To be honest your post baffles me. I like sucking DH cock, when I’m in the mood to do it I don’t think well his not showered in 12 hours....same with him if he comes home from work fancying a shag he doesn’t think well I won’t go down on her as she’s not showered for a while.

What a turn off being sent to Shower, run it under the tap... some of the posters on here can’t have had spontaneous sex in years so clinical

I like sucking DH cock, when I’m in the mood to do it I don’t think well his not showered in 12 hours....same with him if he comes home from work fancying a shag he doesn’t think well I won’t go down on her as she’s not showered for a while
We definitely do think that way, no south before soap simple as. I'm definitely a bit stinky after 12 hours running around all day as I imagine DP is.

I'm not sure I would consider it if I was in the mood. As long as he showers daily and isnt a dirty person surely the passion takes over

Don't people ever have spontaneous sex?
I've never asked DH to shower first and vice versa. We both shower once a day and that's enough.

Spontaneous sex yes but not oral.

So you just what open your legs and he sticks his dick in no foreplay? Sounds wonderful- what a sex life

Is he eager to have sex but refusing to make himself presentable for sex? Or avoiding sex?

What do people do if they fancy sex (Inc oral) first thing in the morning? Both get up and shower first?? Or when you get in from a night out?
Bizarre

he says I'm only doing it because he's clean now

Err yes, I don’t want to go down on you if you’re smelly.

This is just weird.

So you just what open your legs and he sticks his dick in no foreplay? Sounds wonderful- what a sex life
Oral and foreplay are not mutually exclusive.

What do people do if they fancy sex (Inc oral) first thing in the morning? Both get up and shower first?? I can't remember the last time I had morning sex with 2 non sleeping extra need DC it doesn't happen.

YABU
'Going down on someone'? When they've had a shower that morning? You can't?
You have cleanliness issues. You are ott or paranoid?

Dh never smells. I have never had any problems having sex with him, at any time of the day!