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Original poster

Last night I was followed home (road rage incident) aibu to be so angry

152 replies

DianneWhatcock · 04/03/2020 18:01

Driving home with my little DD last night (it was dark) , five minutes from home, suddenly someone appeared behind me then proceeded to tailgate me all the way to my home, honking his horn and flashing his lights clearly trying to intimidate me

(I have racked my brains since and As far as I am aware I did nothing wrong. I have been driving 20 years, never had an accident or even near miss, I am basically a sensible woman in a sensible car. But actually there is no excuse imo for doing what he did)

After a short time, I realised he was actually following me. I was panicking like mad and all I could think of was to drive home. In hindsight maybe should have driven a different way and just tried to lose him I suppose but I wasn't thinking. And then when I pulled up outside my home he pulled up parallel to me, wound his window down and started yelling abuse at me. I grabbed DD and just ran to my front door shouting for H who came out to see what was going on

As soon as he saw DH he drove off however my road is a dead end so he had to turn around at the end and to drive past DH which he did at high speed

I am so angry that someone is that much of a vile aggressive bully that they would actually do such a thing, and to a woman and a child. also I didn't think or have time to get his reg plate so I haven't even been able to report it

I hope if he tries it again he picks on the wrong person and ends up flattened by some psycho. I have ordered a dashcam now I wish to god I already had one. I have been anxious and uneasy since it happened. I mean anything could have happend. And now he knows where I live.

OP posts:
Justaboy · 04/03/2020 18:52

My ex wife had someone cut her up badley near their school so wife c/w two young children chases after this bloke and according the children mummy got this bloke at the traffic lights where she banged on the roof of his car he wound the window down she grabbed his tie and was trying to pull him out of the window!

So yes, there are some right wound up crazy sods out there!

Casino218 · 04/03/2020 18:53

I once got tailgated when I was going to visit a dying man ( nurse). I had to run into the dying mans house to get away from him.

MrOnionsBumperRoller · 04/03/2020 18:54

Dashcams are your friend OP. All my cars have them, a marvellous cunt deterrent indeed.

CorianderLord · 04/03/2020 18:58

I would have noted his reg number and when home called the police and told them about him intimidating and harassing you and driving dangerously.

Hopefully they'd have a word

Mummyoflittledragon · 04/03/2020 19:04

Misogyny at its’ best. Vile. YANBU.

I had a similar incident a couple of weeks ago. I called 999 to ask for help. They told me to go to the closest police station and gave me the address. This was a guy, who must have been going quite fast. I was driving through my village and it was just after school drop off and I was coming out of the car park onto the main village road. I obviously didn’t go fast enough for him (little kids and speed bumps around) snd I suddenly realised he was trying to overtake me. I panicked because I thought if I let him go in front he could slam on the brakes. So I raced him then darted down the next side road and continued to my road, drove straight past my house and he continued to follow. I double backed onto myself, driving past the car park I’d come out of, at which point I called the police. Thankfully he stopped pursuing me and I drove out of my village and on a 10 min detour to get home.

yabadabadontdoit · 04/03/2020 19:09

The police won’t be interested without even a reg number or any way of identifying him, let alone evidence. I was followed twice by someone I had a restraining order against, no evidence so they couldn’t do anything. And yes I got a dash cam after that

DontTouchTheMoustache · 04/03/2020 19:12

That sounds terrifying! You poor thing, i hope you are able to get some cctv and report it

CheekyMango · 04/03/2020 19:16

I've been followed but it was on my way to work. Instead of driving into work I drove round and round and round the second to last roundabout until the barstsrd drive off. Do this next time!!!! If there is a next time Xx

BoucleEponine · 04/03/2020 19:16

Round here you'd run out of petrol before you found a police station open at night

That thought occurred to me, too!

HomerSimpsonSmilingPolitely · 04/03/2020 19:18

Report it. The reg number would help but not knowing it doesn't preclude you from reporting. He sounds scary and dangerous and the police need to know about this.

TiddlestheCat · 04/03/2020 19:18

Can you ask any neighbours if they have CCTV?

ShesGotBetteDavisEyes · 04/03/2020 19:20

This exact thing happened to me Op - I know how awful it is - I still dream about punching him repeatedly his face!

The thing with these men is they would probably never do it to a guy - they’re cowards. The guy who did it to me was a skinny little prick - my dh would’ve flattened him!

I did get his reg and reported it to the police and do you know what they did? Nothing! They “registered” it on their system as a public order offence but he didn’t get a talking to or anything.

I comfort myself with the knowledge that he’s sure to pick on the wrong person one day - someone that disgusting can’t go through life without getting his just desserts at some point I’m sure.

somm · 04/03/2020 19:37

This situation happened to my mum decades ago. She did drive to a police station, and the man concerned than drove off, but
But
"If this happens again drive to a police station" and

"Round here you'd run out of petrol before you found a police station open at night."

Hittapotamus · 04/03/2020 19:38

Good idea to drive to a petrol station if there's no police station because they have loads of CCTV and number plate cameras.

Olawisk · 04/03/2020 19:40

What kind of abuse was he shouting ? That would give you an indication as to why he was so pissed off with you..

Gizmo79 · 04/03/2020 19:40

I have had two incidents like this. Both men following me when they were at fault. Both times I had my very young children in the car.
Absolutely terrifying.
One I reported as managed to take a pic as I had people around as he was shouting at me, the other I just drove for miles and he eventually left but I didn’t manage to get reg no.
It always seems to be men behaving like this. Erhaps women are aware of how intimidating being followed is?

Vanhi · 04/03/2020 19:45

You would know if you had done something dangerous etc, so perhaps your crime was going the actual speed limit or something equally as ridiculous, or perhaps he just thrives off intimidating women; evidenced by the fact he drove off when your DH appeared.

This. I've had people overtake me when I'm doing 28mph in a 30 zone. They're aggressive fuckwits. On my bike I had someone pull out right in front of me in a car, so I gave him a one-finger salute. OK, that's not polite but when someone risks your life you tend not to be. He started shouting the odds at me and told me he would rip my fucking head off if I ever swore at him again. His young daughter, maybe 8 years old, was in the car with him and she was absolutely terrified.

Honestly some men, and it almost always is men, react with awful amounts of aggression. I doubt very much he'll be back though, he'll just move on to the next target and hopefully he'll give himself a heart attack.

Beamur · 04/03/2020 19:48

I got tailgated/followed last year. Really annoying and worrying in equal measure.
They gave up after about 5 miles but I was thinking of pulling into a fire station which was on the way.
Horrible and pathetic behaviour.

Jellybeansincognito · 04/03/2020 19:50

Gosh op- are you ok?

Can I also ask anyone with a dash cam if it has made people react to your car differently? Like stopping people from tailgating you etc.

MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig · 04/03/2020 19:51

I had a car overtake me and then slam on its brakes in front of me. I braked and swerved round so he swerved into my path and kept weaving back and forth at low speed. Fuck alone knows what I’d done to piss him off. Not driving fast enough presumably. It was a black Audi saloon with really low wide profile tyres, a massive rear spoiler and blacked out windows so not the classiest of people. He got a little way ahead so I swung hard into a side lane and turned my lights off so he couldn’t see me in his mirrors. He buggered off after that. I drove the rest of the way home looking out for him. And I had the dcs with me. Prick.

Honeybee85 · 04/03/2020 19:53

@Olawisk

Hmm seriously? It doesn’t matter what the OP did wrong, there’s no excuse for this! Your post suggests victim blaming. What kind of mistake would justify this? I can’t think of any. This sounds like some kind of road psycho who deliberately targeted a woman and her child. Be sure he wouldn’t have dared to do this if not the OP but some big guy was behind the wheel in OP’s car and did a ‘mistake’.

Op, report this asshole.
I really hope some day soon, he’ll do this to the wrong person and karma comes biting him in the arse.

You didn’t do anything to deserve this Flowers

BrendasUmbrella · 04/03/2020 19:55

He probably did something wrong so needed to find the closest woman driver to vent his impotent rage on.

Italiangreyhound · 04/03/2020 19:56

That sounds terrible. I believe you can drive to a police station then the person would not follow you but it's unlikely you will find one open if you live in the countryside.

You could also (if it happened again) take a photo of him (from a safe distance) and record the license plate.

What an absolute jerk!

Italiangreyhound · 04/03/2020 19:57

Yes Beamur or a fire station.

looondonn · 04/03/2020 20:06

I'm so angry reading this

Hope you managed to report

What a bad c--t

Hope you are ok
What is the best thing to do in these situations?

I beeped the horn once at a guy in Catford who almost smashed into the front of my car
He slammed on the brakes and left his car and came for me
I sat in car with doors locked and windows up
Luckily others pulled up beside us and he could see he had a large audience
Was just awful :(

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