AIBU to get annoyed at drivers who let me out of side streets or in traffic?

[Manchestermanchester]

I turn right into work every day. There is a turning lane and there are many business where I work. The traffic coming towards me isn’t bad as there is a set of traffic lights that keeps the traffic light.

However I’m always getting flashed to turn right when I don’t see the point - I can wait an extra few seconds for cars to pass.

This annoys me because I’ve already got it in my mind to turn right when the road is clear (it’s never more than a few cars). It’s not just a simple case of turning right as soon as I get flashed - I have to look to see there are no cyclists (we have plenty), that there are no pedestrians are crossing the road and check again to make sure the road is also clear and the driver has travelled at speed to me and will crash into me. Waiting for a few cars to pass, which takes a few seconds seems the preferable way.

There is also the insurance issue. If I turned and I crashed into the other car, or indeed a car that stopped in front of the car letting me out, I’m at fault. Furthermore I might get rear ended. Plus I don’t flash people a thank you for letting me through. It’s too easy to mistake that for “come over through” plus I’ve got to have both hands on the steering wheel.

No doubt I’ll get a bunch of people saying I’m rude or whatever, are you going to pay for my insurance claim?

So much for driving in line with the Highway Code

Well people don't. We've had two lots of roadworks near our road in the last couple of years with temporary traffic lights and I felt effectively trapped in my house during that time because people would stop across the end of the road in the traffic queue rather than leaving a gap for people living in our road to get in or out. Even a police car did it one day.

Many parts of the HC are actually legally enforceable and the rest is considered good safe practice. Many of the posters in this thread are in for a shock if they ever have to take a driving test again.

As far as I can see from the HC, drivers are not technically allowed to pull into the middle lane to allow traffic on the slip roads to join the motorway. Do you consider the general custom for people to do this a bad/dangerous thing? Bearing in mind that, if nobody does this to let you in to a non-stop stream of traffic, you can end up having to stop at the end of a slip road and then be in a position of needing to join 70mph traffic from stationary. Is that safer?

Do you always pull and push the steering wheel, never crossing your arms, using your handbrake at every stage whilst doing a turn in the road?

Yes, a lot of the HC is law, but I still maintain that some of it is catch-all guidance based on new or very inexperienced drivers, in the same way that you tell young children never to speak to any strangers, as they're not yet able to discern which ones are or aren't likely to pose a potential threat to them.

@MapMySleighRide is that sarcasm?

@cologne4711 I doubt anyone in the driving industry would say what I’m doing is incorrect. Everyone in the insurance industry agrees with me.

@PickwickThePlockingDodo the insurance company won’t stick up for you. You caused the accident.

I’ve no idea why you bothered posting this @Manchestermanchester, if you’re going to argue with everyone who disagrees with you, what’s the point? You seem to know better than anyone else.

Don't assume just as it's a police car that the driver doesn't drive badly.

@MapMySleighRide is that sarcasm?

Why ever would it be sarcasm? The Highway Code is a basic foundation of driving law and good driving practice - it isn't an instruction manual that you can simply sit and learn and then expect to be a pefect driver, without any tuition, on-the-road practice, test and experience. Unless you're Julius from Twins, maybe....

Going back to my earlier learning-to-read analogy and juxtaposing it with MapMySleighRide's comment, would you not think it sad in any way if adults of all ages were not capable of reading and understanding books any more complex than the last level they read at school?

It is definitely not sarcasm

'The way I look at it, anyone pausing to let me out is saying they personally won't impede my exit. They are NOT saying the road is clear for my manoeuvre - that's for me to assess.

Yes, this.

Quite often, there's adequate room and time for you to go without causing any disruption to the flow of the traffic '

Not round here there isn't

I think this is area specific.

Round here traffic is v heavy and slow and letting people out... Buses, cars, lorries is standard. No flashing. Leave a gap. Maybe a wave. Otherwise it would be gridlock.

Other thing that is normal round here is flashing your hazards briefly to say say thanks. Bloke I know from Essex said he was driving nearer London and people kept putting their hazards on.. I said oh! That means thank you. Not where you're from? Started with buses here.

The highway code would again say no. But, where traffic is very heavy, roads narrow, a culture develops, to avoid intense rage. We let people out. We wave. Flashing less common. Thank you with a couple of blinks of hazards. It's all good

OP idea would make driving in my part of London pretty much impossible and way way more arsey. No thanks.

@FrogsFrogs you’ve clearly misunderstood the point. The traffic isn’t heavy, often cars will flash to let you out and they are the only car on the road. You’ve missed the point, incredibly.

Also flashing hazards is a different example
and not something I disagree with.

No she hasn’t missed the point, she’s describing what it’s like where she lives, where being flashed out is a good thing. What part of “area specific” don’t you understand?

I've been in an accident because of a driver flashing someone to make a right turn.
In our case there were 2 lanes of traffic each way, and the truck in the right hand lane flashed the driver across but we were coming up the left hand lane and he went straight into us because he assumed that both lanes were clear cause the truck indicated with the flash to go. Wrote my car off.

If there's working traffic lights it does seem counter productive for drivers to flash to let you out - surely that's the whole point of lights! If it wasn't traffic light controlled and heavy traffic it makes sense to keep the traffic flowing for each car to flash one through. There are studies to suggest busy junctions can flow better without traffic lights (and I'm inclined to agree in a lot of cases): www.theguardian.com/environment/bike-blog/2017/sep/22/what-happens-if-you-turn-off-the-traffic-lights

I do agree that a lot of road users do seem totally oblivious to oncoming traffic/potential dangers. I remember one driving lesson where I encountered half a dozen cyclists riding two abreast on a narrow road, approaching a sharp bend. Not a problem, I slow down and wait to be able to overtake safely. However, the front most cyclist was peristently trying to wave me on to overtake them despite there a) not being the space for the car to physically fit and b) me not being able to see whether there was any oncoming traffic. My instuctor did ask the guy if he had a death wish!

@Alsohuman it’s not specific to the topic

So we have:
-flashing lights
-waving
-gesturing
-hazard lights

All being used in place of a decades old standardised set of instructions, because people feel its out-dated and makes for impolite driving.

Which is a memo the insurance companies definitely haven’t received.

I would bet there is a correlation between polite drivers and people that cannot parallel park and back off their drives into traffic.

Of course it's specific to the topic!

'AIBU to get annoyed at drivers who let me out of side streets or in traffic?'

YABU.

'All being used in place of a decades old standardised set of instructions, because people feel its out-dated and makes for impolite driving.

Which is a memo the insurance companies definitely haven’t received.

I would bet there is a correlation between polite drivers and people that cannot parallel park and back off their drives into traffic.'

Erm, no.

Conventions arise to smooth the way in crowded difficult situations.

Round here people of all types let people out. Buses, lorries, big cars, little cars, white vans, driven by all sorts of drivers.

It's usually the more experienced drivers who are looking down the road and thinking, there is a queue, I can let someone out at no cost to myself rather than sitting across the junction like an arse.

Although I agree that parallel parking a bus is probably fairly tricky.

You know, putting “Erm” at the start of a post does not lend it weight? You just look really patronising and rude as though you think I’m thick for having an opinion.

You’re not that rude are you?

Conventions are not required. Follow The HC. It has standardised conventions the whole country, not just those that live where you do, can follow. Then, if something goes wrong all those people in vans, buses and little cars are equally protected too.

Lol

Come and stand in North West London with a sign please berating all the drivers for not behaving asv you wish.

There are 500000 people in this borough, most of whom you need to tell off

I was intending to be patronising and rude

Because it's silly to have a go at me for reporting what is common across vast amounts of people who are doing their best to get around and let others get around in what are unpleasant driving conditions.

Police cars let people out sometimes OMG!!! hazards as thanks started with buses .. write to the bus companies about it? No point telling me off, I'm quite happy with it all.

And i don't personally control the conventions on the roads in NW London...

You assume me to be way more powerful than I am!

This thread is hilarious.

Can’t believe that someone would complain about a driver offering this. You do know that you can quite happily say no thanks don’t you? you aren’t duty bound to pull out because another driver tells you too and it’s a bit concerning as you’re obviously a nervous driver if you feel unhappy or pressured by that.

As a PP suggested, maybe you should get some more lessons 🤔

Really? You were? How strange you are.

North West London, you say? Happy to avoid that little insurance claim nirvana, thanks for the tip.