To not attend DFriend's wedding because of DS?

[Refreshed]

The bride to be has asked me via text today if she can ask a favour (complete with that annoying monkey emoji with its hands covering its face)

She asked if I would mind just putting my DS in something basic she picks out for him, as she knows how I have the best ideas and how lovely I dress him and doesn't want him mistaken for the wedding party.

I have no idea what she's going on about. A few other friends have been invited to the wedding and they've received no such texts about their DC clothes! I find it so bizarre.

Would I be unreasonable not to go now? It's in March.

She asked me to style her flower girls and paige boys. She know full well I wouldn't dress my own child in the same as them.

Nope, it's still a batshit comment to make. OP has already said that the pageboys will be in suits and ties, and her son's outfit will look nothing like it.

Being worried that your friend's son will be dressed too well for an event is crazy, particularly as the look is very much shorts-and-smocked-shirt and not, say, morning dress (which, I agree, is not suitable for a 2 year old).

There are far more important things to worry about in a wedding. And focusing on this is narcissistic. (Not in a modern NPD way, in the classic drowning-because-I-find-my-reflection-so-fascinating sense.)

I'm glad you called her. I agree with PP that it's shitstirring and not self-generated, as evidenced by the weird text. What unpleasant, snipey behavior on the part of whomever is doing it.

Forgive your friend--it's not a big deal, and don't make it one. Go to the wedding. The crazy will pass.

oohh she's avoiding you now 🙄

@Dinosauratemydaffodils I love kilts and think they’re lovely and formal but I do wonder why you’d be hurt by the request?

Looking at the pics you shared, she's just worried that your DS will be in something more traditional, cutesy and "paige boy" than the paige boys therefore it'll look like your DS is the only paige boy. It's not something I'd worry about and I think she could have put it differently but I get why some might feel the way she does.

If she's a good friend, it's just for one day, why not ask her what she has in mind - you may be able to put it together from what you have (eg chinos and a shirt). I wouldn't fall out over it and YWBU to not attend the wedding.

Nothing intrinsically wrong with outfit, OP.

The bride is a nutter.

(Still think you should put him in a dinosaur suit 😀

Cacaca I've got Friday brain

sharp claws - most probably the same idiots telling people to be kind and polishing crowns 🙄

Sounds about right.

@Refreshed would he not be freezing in that in March?!

I have to say that they look like outfits that suit a young child being baptised.

Something like this would be fine. Minus the bow tie, IMO, although it does have a little dinosaur.

And this why I eloped- weddings are so fucking shallow these days.

All anybody cares about is appearances and pretty photos.

It's all bollox and I'd give the actual marriage 18 months tops.

She's worried you're going to dress him like the wedding party. Reassure her you won't and show her a picture of what his outfit is.

YABU to dress your child like that unless you are Kate. Otherwise pure nouveau.

The outfits are fine but it's her wedding and I think your options are compromise or dont go. It really doesnt matter what we think. Had she already seen the outfit? If so then either change it or dont go, IMHO it seems crazy not to go over a 2 year olds clothes. If she hasnt seen it send her a picture and see what she says. Shes obviously stressed out right now but you are close enough to help her style the children in her wedding then I would compromise on the outfit and put him in what she suggests.

^^

A few examples of our more formal style, everyday generally more relaxed with nice co-ordinating lounge sets etc

... seriously?

Rawwwwwwrrrrr!!!!

Lweji that's exactly how my ds has gone to every wedding we've ever attended. Minus the bow tie! And sometimes in trousers if winter and a fine knit cardigan. From age 2 until last one when he was 13.

Personally I wouldn't make anyone wear chinos.

can I just ask what trousers do you kids wear then? Apart from jeans, which are neither suitable or comfortable for every occasion, what else can you buy for boys?

There's nothing wrong with OPs style though. I know plenty of people who can afford to style their children and do so regularly.

I've never batted an eyelid.

Have people got nothing better to do than 'style' their children?

Is that poncey for 'getting them dressed'? Like 'sourced' usually means 'got it from the shops'?

I'm sorry but this thread is hilarious

Have people got nothing better to do than 'style' their children?

I am not even sure I know what that means
My own kids wear clothes....

I’ve seen many a child in outfits similar to the ones op posted at weddings and imo they are fine for a 2 year old. I have however seen a 5 year old in one and that was bordering on hideous.
I’m guessing the bride would prefer him dressed in chinos and shirt and waistcoat.

bingbang
I “styled” my dd for a shopping trip this morning in a t-shirt with a cat wearing a tiara on it, black leggings (which I later realised have a hole in the leg), fluffy welly socks and puddle-stained ugg boots. I then ran a brush through her hair and she stuck in a cat-ear headband with one broken ear (yes, she has a thing about cats) “We” call it “juvenile bag-lady chic”

@bingbangbing

What does a lounge suit for a toddler look like? For everyday wear?

My toddler is mostly in joggers or dungarees day to day. I find wearing jeans/smart clothes very uncomfortable so want him to be comfortable too.

Ohhh lounge set is just a posh name for a tracksuit.