To wonder why looks are more of an issue to women than men?

[malificent7]

Of course nowadays there is certainly pressure on men to look good and have a gym body aswell as women, however why is it that age is more attractive in men rather than women.
For example, men can grow grey gracefully whilst with women wd are encouraged to dye hair.
Prob done to death but it feels worth another discussion.

Patriarchy

Because years later of women focusing on their appearance to try and ‘catch’ a rich husband.

Pride and prejudice not so far out of date

Patriarchy - keep women in their place by prettifying and putting on a shelf to be viewed. I.E. Objectify them. Over many years women have bought into this to. Why not - who doesn't want to look lovely and be elevated when it is promoted as being better than the next person?

*later was a random auto fill

It’s because women are still using their looks to marry up. Conversely men are under pressure to earn well. It’s just the remnant of the old model of mating. As it’s becoming increasingly unaffordable and socially unacceptable for a man to have a wife that is less successful I would expect the expectations to become more equal albeit not necessarily lesser.

I would also like to know the answer.
Why is the post baby body more unattractive?
Sagging breasts and a stomach pouch that wont ever leave. Evolutionary speaking these should be signs that someone is fertile and can reproduce but they are seen as unattractive.
When I was younger and saw these on an older women I didnt want to be like them, they weren't inspirational to me for some reason.
Are we suppose to look more unattractive as a male may see it as this person is taken and perceive it as a threat (I'm thinking in animal terms here) or is it the patriarchy that has told us that this is unattractive?
Another example would be post menopausal women.
The facial hair and vaginal dryness, lack of libido seem to be signs that this is not fertile ground.
It's scary and sad that our body are affected so much by our fertility.
I have a post baby body the above and varicous veins, double chin and thinning hair have been my life since I was 18.
I see all these things as unattractive and they shouldn't be but to me they are.

I think women are just more self conscious and have more desire to look good than men do.

Tbh it’s other women causing the issue in my experience. Men don’t seem to care.

Because we live in a patriarchal society where women are primarily valued for their looks or as sexual objects while men can be valued for different things.

I'm not sure I agree with the "marrying-up" business. I know plenty of men whose girlfriends are far more attractive than them, where both in the couple earn the same, or even the girlfriend earns more.

It's very interesting. If you're interested in the subject then 'animal' and 'sex, power, money' both by Sarah Pascoe are fascinating.

Because the patriarchy obviously! All women are valued for is how they look, they’re too stupid to offer anything else, like political ideas or wisdom, that’s for men. Women’s job is too look pretty to keep the important men happy.

I know this deep diwn and yet as my looks fade i do mourn it...like im loosing some sort of currency in the world.

The patriarchy.

Patriarchy + attraction but a lot of the finer detail is fashion which is women for women which probably started because rich women were bored because they weren’t allowed to work.
I can’t remember who said “I dress for women and undress for men”.

It does depend on the person too. For example I remember I was fairly attractive as a little girl but what I remember from my parents was praise for doing well at school. I didn;'t really know I looked quite good until I was older and was lucky to have parents like that. Don't praise little girls for looking prettty but instead because they are the top of the class.

Not surprisingly I have as a result had a successful legal career which I still very much enjoy and am not too interested in how I look.

Because we live in a society in where the most important thing a woman can be is beautiful. She could be a nobel prize winning physicist, author of a series of Booker prize winning novels, and risk her life rescuing kittens from avalanches, but if she isn't beautiful she will have failed. Conversely, if she is beautiful, she could have the IQ of a mango and the personality of Stalin, but people will treat her every utterance as the wisdom of the gods.

I don’t know but I love being a woman and dying my hair and looking good.

I do it because I love taking care of myself and I love feeling good about myself.

It does depend on the person too. For example I remember I was fairly attractive as a little girl but what I remember from my parents was praise for doing well at school. I didn;'t really know I looked quite good until I was older and was lucky to have parents like that. Don't praise little girls for looking prettty but instead because they are the top of the class.

Same for me. It came as quite a shock when I got older and realised people only really cared about my appearance, not about any of the things I was really good at.

I don't give a shit, but I think that is in large part due to having an upbringing in which I was praised for things other than my looks.

Women are basically the human version of the Male peacock.

I’d not say women are trying to snare a rich husband, hang about here for five mins and some of them will even pay just to have some bloke who treats them like shit in their lives, money isn’t important to many.

In my experience women compete with other women more on looks, and women are more judgemental about other women’s looks, dress etc. It’s really not as simple as doing it to attract a mate.

I think it's a rare man who actually looks good as he grows older. Some do, but most just look older. I think it's mostly a myth that men look better as they age.

I think how much pressure you are under to keep your looks as a women depends on the sort of social circles you move in. I see a lot of pressure in the media, but in my community most women don't bother trying to keep up and just look fairly normal. For example I only see a few women wearing make up on the school run, and those women work in offices so the pressure probably comes from that environment. I think if I lived in a posher area it would probably be different.

I think ageing men face a different set of pressures, again depending on their social background. I've seen a lot of competitive exercisers trying to out mamil each other, for example.

Its about declining fertility innit? We are here to have babies for the men, men are here to be strong, intelligent providers of all the things. Aging is for women linked with declining fertility and therefore being less useful.
Older women who aren't motherly have been feared for centuries, see all the fairy tales ever written.

SueEllen

"The Patriarchy"

FFS

It’s not even true, like most generalisations. Some men care passionately what they look like, some women don’t give a toss.

Becoming invisible with age has been really liberating for me. No unwanted sexual attention, no leering, having my face spoken to instead of my tits, it’s empowering.

There isn't at all. The pressure on teenage boys is worst than on teenage girls for a start.

The issue is more about age than looks.