Small children taking up seats

[pigdogridesagain]

I recently attended my local walk in centre for a minor ailment, waiting time was around 3 hours. It was absolutely packed in there. I noticed that there were quite a few very ill looking adults stood as all the seats were taken. However many of the seats were taken by small children, AIBU to expect parents to put them on their laps so that adults can sit down? Another thing I noticed was people bringing 3 or 4 family members/friends with them, again taking up seats that someone who is obviously poorly could have used, AIBU?

I had to go to the walk in centre and went with my OH as he needed to drive me. He stood most of the wait as he didn't need a seat, it wasn't him who was unwell. The only times he sat was when I went in to triage and when I got called in as he kept my seat and he only did that due to there being hardly any seats as most of them had been taken up by healthy adults waiting with their ill family member.

I have no problem with people bringing their children, not everyone can leave their kids home. But the healthy adults taking up the seats really annoys me.

Also sat next to a lady who was quite chirpy and not in any kind of visible discomfort so couldn't have been too serious. She got annoyed because another lady who arrived after her with a broken arm was seen first.

YANBU - a hospital appointment seems to be an excuse for a day out for some people. Small children should be sat on laps if busy. But agree the hospital should have signs up and try to administer rules, you can’t really start kicking off because you don’t have a seat if other people were there before you/have been waiting longer.

The outpatients' clinics at my local hospital have signs to that effect.

"Also sat next to a lady who was quite chirpy and not in any kind of visible discomfort so couldn't have been too serious."
Incredibly ill people can be "quite chirpy" as you put it....you really cant diagnose just by looking at someone you know.

so vile...the title of this thread!!!!!!

Children are people too. Fair enough healthy companions not giving up their seat for obviously ill people but straight away you attack the children....

@LolaSmiles it was one of those rare situations where no two adults could go off with the kids. I had fallen and hit my head on a day out, so I was a bit confused. DH had driven me and the kids to A&E, but he had to stay with me because of the confusion (and to make sure he was there to answer doctor's questions etc).

We phoned my mum to come and get the kids; she was out with her sister, who was suffering from dementia. They had travelled by bus, so got a bus to the hospital, and phoned my dad to come and collect them and the kids. Mum couldn't manage 2 kids and my aunt alone, so couldnt go off with them anywhere or get the bus home (Aunt was ok sitting in A&E, and DH was there as well so he and mum watched kids between them - DH couldn't take 2 kids plus Aunt to cafe as she didn't really know him and would have been unsettled and possibly wandered off).

Thankfully my dad arrived pretty quickly and took them all away! (And he couldn't take the kids on his own as DD was a baby and he really wasn't confident with feeding her etc).

Just a really odd combination of circumstances, really! Thankfully it wasn't particularly busy, and DH took DS on his knee while Mum and Aunt cuddled DD.

@CameraTime how was that unavoidable? Why couldn't the other three adults and extra child find a cafe/family pub or the hospital cafe? Wait in the car, go for a drive, if no car then there are always buses outside hospitals that run late. It's ridiculous to have that many people with you.

Why couldn't the other three adults and extra child find a cafe/family pub or the hospital cafe? Which one?
One was the DH. He needed to speak with the doctor.
One was the DM not able for 2 young children and a sister with dementia.
One has dementia.

As @EmeraldShamrock said. I couldn't really be left alone, and there weren't any combinations that would work. It was like that puzzle where you have to get a fox and chickens across a river!

@EmeraldShamrock you see you didn’t need to have to explain yourself and your situation!! THAT’S what’s wrong with society and people these days!! They get all involved in other people’s business, making assumptions and thinking that one situation fits all as such!! If a family chooses to all attend the A&E dept then so be it, I’m sure if it could be avoided it would...but sometimes it’s not do black and white!!! I once had to attend A&E with my son in another country so I had to be brought by another adult In the car and also we had no one to mind the other two children in the house so they had to come too!! My son was extremely sick and I needed support so the other adult didn’t want to leave me until another family member came to pick up the other two children...that took over a half and hour!!

CameraTime
That does seem like an odd set of circumstances.
But out of interest, if your mum couldn't manage 2 kids and her sister then why did she come? To an outsider you were no better off having the extra two adults.

@LolaSmiles because maybe she was concerned for her daughter?!?!?

@LolaSmiles firstly, she was able to help out a bit. Aunt was capable of cuddling the baby, and sat happily doing that, which meant that my mum could watch DS if I got called in by the doctor (she wasn't totally confident about two kids plus Aunt, but we figured that at least in A&E there'd be people about who'd help if aunt tried to take off - not a great situation, but the best we could do). Secondly, Mum needed to go home with my dad and the kids - he wasn't sure he could manage the kids on his own, so wanted mum with him. As they had been out in town, having got the bus, it was much easier for them to come to the hospital rather than Dad having to go in and pick them up.

Lipperfromchipper
Perhaps, but in general I'm not convinced having multiple adults hanging around hospital waiting areas out of concern is reasonable.
I'm sure people who turn everything into a family day trip having picnics are concerned. It doesn't make it reasonable.

DC had to go to urgent care and paediatrics recently. In paediatrics everyone was sensible, no massive outings, children using the toys, everyone had seats. Urgent care was ridiculous and reception staff had to ask people to give up seats for patients. Apparently someone early 20s with a sprained ankle (back from X ray and talking loudly) needs to have 3 friends with them, hospital selfies optional.

(Btw I'm not having a go camera just curious)

I admit that I don't have much A&E experience and I don't know about blanket rules, but something is needed to control groups. When DH needed stitches in his leg I was 7 months pregnant. I wasn't the patient and couldn't have stood up for the full 3 hours while we waited, but I would have gone to the cafe if the waiting room was genuinely full of patients because he didn't need much help (except fetching a nurse when he started bleeding over the floor through his bandages). Luckily there were enough seats at the time despite 2 family groups of more than 4 adults with 1 patient plus 2 police officers with another 3 adults for 1 patient (they were taking statements). There were no children creating any issue with space unless the one pushchair counts. Reading the above it looks like these ridiculous groups are actually quite common, which boggles the mind. I'm sure there could be a rule to at least restrict people to one adult with a patient (5 minutes leeway if they're swapping the adult over) and everyone else needs to wait outside.

@CameraTime - your DH could have taken both kids to the cafe, or your mum find have taken her sister plus one kid leaving you with just DH and the baby. You really didn't all need to be there.

YANBU. It's ridiculous and entitled behaviour.

@MRex DH needed to stay with me to talk to the doctor, as he knew what had happened and my medical details etc.

Mum and Aunt could have taken one child to the cafe, I guess, and that's probably what we would have done if it had been busy. But it would have meant us taking the other child in with us if the doctor called us in - not the end of the world, but we thought it would be easier to not need to do that.

I do think you could alleviate some of the problems by having some toys/ books in areas you know may have people waiting for a long time with small children.

@CameraTime - I'm sure your DH could have told your DM the 3 sentences she needed to know. 2 extra adults was never going to be the best solution you child have come up with.

Bibijayne - all the toys/ books etc we brought in the for our clinic to keep children entertained disappeared within a week of purchase. (Large city hospital, toys bought from clinic nurses own pockets).

@MRex, he didn't know what the doctor might ask. He could have written down all the regular medication I'm on etc, and again, if it had been busy, maybe he'd have done that. This also would have meant my Aunt staying with mum and I, which would have been fine until the doctor called us through and Aunt got flustered and Mum had to deal with her.

All in all, it was decided that it was best to all stay together until my dad arrived.

Took DC1 in to A&E for concussion and numbness down one side. Sent to paeds A&E waiting room. Was given a bed for a bit but then told she needed to go back to waiting room as bed needed for someone who'd just come back from theatre. No one came into the waiting room with us to notice that there were no free seats - but all but one bed in the area we'd been in was being used as an ipad stand to amuse a toddler in a buggy - why bother to give them a bed then and turf DC out?

It happens on trains too all the time.

I had to get my dad to hospital for a suspected heart attack. Doctor wouldn’t provide transport so I had to take him and two kids with me on the bus. My partner met me half way and assisted with the kids. He couldn’t take them home because my nan was having one of her funny turns and verbally attacking people. (Teenagers hid in the bedroom and didn’t cone out) plus she is prone to falling asleep.