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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

The Toilet Seat Saga

343 replies

Rosebyanothername19 · 09/02/2020 23:04

Basically my husband and I have an ongoing dispute over the downstairs toilet. I have asked him a million times to put the lid down after he uses it - which is about every half hour...

I have sent him links to articles about hygiene and also put a large note on top of the toilet asking nicely to put the lid down in case he just forgets. I have pointed our that our baby is going to be crawling soon and, as the downstairs loo is between the living room and kitchen, she is probably going to end up in there numerous times.

Every request is met with an eye roll and him saying that's it's not a big deal or just ignored.

So tonight I have decided that every time he leaves the lid up I will empty a beer down the sink and leave the bottle upside down. I haven't told him this and I'm just going to start doing it and wait until he asks or realises what is going on.

AIBU?

OP posts:
nacher · 10/02/2020 10:12

Ponoka7 I'm someone who only has a downstairs bathroom, so I get that. I was genuinely wondering if anyone with a separate downstairs loo keeps a toothbrush in there.

JRUIN · 10/02/2020 10:27

Why would you waste beer? I agree with your DH that leaving the bog seat up isn't a big deal. Don't think I've ever put mine down and I've raised 5 kids with not one health issue between them. Shut the loo door when your kid starts crawling and stop worrying about such trivia, life's too short.

beefthief · 10/02/2020 10:34

@Ponoka7 because the seats natural position is down and those that lift it, should put it back down.

Ah yes, just how you find them in nature.

welshladywhois40 · 10/02/2020 10:42

Maybe play the long game - once the baby is crawling encourage your baby drop something that belongs to him down the toilet - we will soon learn!

I have a toddler and for that reason we always have the seat down. Toilets are fascinating for toddlers

PettyContractor · 10/02/2020 10:47

In my home it's the male who puts the lid down and the females who leave it up.

I like it down because (a) it looks nicer, an uncovered toilet feels a bit uncouth, and (b) what's the point of a lid if it's never used? You've paid for something you don't need!

Don't care about germs and harmless poo particles that I can't see.

lynsey91 · 10/02/2020 11:31

@WalkingDeadTrainee just seems a bit ignorant to leave the seat up. I expect a seat and lid to be down on a toilet when I walk into a bathroom.

Of course I am capable of putting the seat down if DH left it up but thankfully he is not uncouth

Twooter · 10/02/2020 11:37

Why don’t you just keep your toothbrush next to your bed, and take it into the bathroom when you brush your teeth?

aroundtheworldyet · 10/02/2020 11:48

This thread is mad. Totally mad.
I just don’t understand why something in life could annoy you so much.

belinda789 · 10/02/2020 11:52

@Rosebyanothername19
He is ignoring your notice and sometimes makes a mess...……...
You requested alternative suggestions.
Try this for a notice:-
"Our aim is to keep this toilet clean.
Your aim can help"

WalkingDeadTrainee · 10/02/2020 13:50

just seems a bit ignorant to leave the seat up

There are plenty of ignorant things in the world but leaving seat up is really not one imo.😂

Each to their own I guess.

bugbhaer · 10/02/2020 16:30

This thread is bonkers, of course the lid should always go down. Those that don’t, what on earth do you think it’s there for?

Hingeandbracket · 10/02/2020 16:35

Is no one else worried about the germs that get sprayed around your bathroom when you flush the toilet with the lid up??
No - 58 years in and still not dead from imaginary toilet hazards caused by TV adverts.

JosefKeller · 10/02/2020 16:38

It's not imaginary hazards at all, you just happen to be lucky.

There's a balance between an unhealthy sterile environment and one too dirty. You don't need to research very far to see studies about unhealthy and unsuitable environments.

Not putting the lid down is just vile.

Topseyt · 10/02/2020 16:47

Plenty of public toilets don't even have lids to shut. People don't just walk out of then and snuff it.

Of course it is an imaginary hazard. We are built to withstand germs around us. It is called an immune system. Every surface and every wall has plenty of germs all over it. Computer keyboards and phone screens are also pretty germ ridden but most of us are using those right now.

DappledThings · 10/02/2020 16:51

This thread is bonkers, of course the lid should always go down. Those that don’t, what on earth do you think it’s there for?

For sitting on while supervising bath time/brushing the teeth of small, wriggly children. Have only ever put it down to flush it in public toilets with those vacuum systems.

I honestly had no idea people regularly put the lid down just to flush. Has never occurred to me to do so.

JosefKeller · 10/02/2020 16:51

some people need to research how healthy it is not to worry about faeces Grin

next you'll tell medical staff to stop washing their hands, we know how that one works out...

Topseyt · 10/02/2020 16:56

We should all really just keep our toilets in sealed glass cabinets and never use them.

That way they stay clean and no shit plumes get sprayed high up into the atmosphere.

That would be the only sensible solution. Using the toilets for what they are designed for is an utterly batshit idea. It will make them dirty.

JosefKeller · 10/02/2020 16:57

why do you think they have a lid?

and most normal people don't put loos in bathrooms or any other room apart from a dedicated toilet...

DappledThings · 10/02/2020 17:00

and most normal people don't put loos in bathrooms or any other room apart from a dedicated toilet...

Say what now? We've just had a new bathroom and an en suite put in. Both have toilets in them. Pretty sure that's a "normal" design.

This thread has got hilarious.

Wingedharpy · 10/02/2020 17:01

E-bay, £35.50, Automatic soft close toilet seat.
Has a sensor which lifts the lid as the user approaches and automatically closes the lid 30 seconds after the user leaves the sensor area.
You do some hand waving business to raise the seat bit.
Don't come back here complaining that you never spend any quality time with your DH as he's always in the bathroom playing with the loo seat!👍

Hingeandbracket · 10/02/2020 17:02

why do you think they have a lid? so stuff doesn't fall in - eg mobile phone.

Hingeandbracket · 10/02/2020 17:03

@topseyt for PM!!!

Hingeandbracket · 10/02/2020 17:06

It's not imaginary hazards at all, you just happen to be lucky.

Yeah, I've been dodging it all this time - who knew I was (and still am) just one flush away from disaster.

Not putting the lid down is just vile.
Vile? Holy flip.

Topseyt · 10/02/2020 17:08

Every house or flat I have ever lived in has had a toilet in the bathroom. The only one that has been a dedicated toilet room has been the downstairs one.

Highonpotandused · 10/02/2020 17:09

I would love an auto lid!

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