To say it’s us or the dog

[Totallyfedupnow]

My mother is visiting for a few days and has brought her dog, which is an 8 year old rescue dog. While I was out, the dog jumped up and attacked my TV, knocking it off the low table it sits on. In the process the screen was badly fractured, the TV no longer works and is most likely unrepairable. The TV is almost new (only about eight months old) and no, not insured, and yes, it’s the only TV we’ve got. Apparently there was a penguin on TV that the dog didn’t like and he just went for it.
This is bad enough. But as it’s got older the dog has started getting spooked more and more often, and every so often it will take exception to something inoffensive my son (aged 6) does (like standing up or coming into a room) and go for him too. Last time it bit him on the shoulder (lightly) and frightened him badly. At Christmas it got spooked by my niece (aged 7) when she and my son were playing with toys on the carpet and went for her. It has also bitten the back of my calf as I left a room. So far no blood has been drawn but it is frightening and who knows if or when the bites will become more serious. And now I’ve just lost our TV.

The trouble is my mother is devoted to her dog, and always finds an excuse for why he was “provoked” (at Christmas my sister was blamed for letting the children play with their Christmas presents on the floor....). She now has a crate at her house which she puts the dog in when visitors come, but I don’t have room to store a crate in my home. I think we are now at the stage where I am
going to have to say, if you visit us you have to leave the dog with a sitter. My mother is not going to like that AT ALL as she is devoted to both my son and the dog, sitters are expensive, and she is a pensioner. Aibu?

Safety of your children first over the dog any day. If it were my mother and if she was really struggling financially due to have a very small pension- I would offer a contribution to the dog sitter fees (or pay the lot if I were rich!). But i would be firm the dog couldnt be around the kids any more.

Of course yanbu!
The dog bites. Ignoring the damage to your hosue factor, I wouldn't have a dog in the house that has shown aggressive behaviour, let alone towards children . It's not the dogs fault but no one should be at risk... dog stays home or Mum doesn't visit your house!

(And I have a dog and am a huge dog lover, but I don't believe in takings risks)

Fucking hell! I’d have banned it from the house after the first biting incident never mind 3!

I do hope your (deluded) Mother has offered to buy you a new television.

Good grief , it’s bitten you all there times and it’s at the broken TV that’s the last straw? .... the fact the dog ‘didn’t draw blood’ is irrelevant, it’s biting people with no provocation!!

Seriously, you need to keep the dog away from your kids

Seriously, the bloody thing bites?! Don’t allow it in your house again under any circumstances. On a side note, I had to laugh about the dog taking offence at the penguin on telly 😆

How big is this dog? He/she sounds seriously dangerous.

Yanbu . I love my dog , but she has issues and I would not trust her with kids at all . I’d never risk her biting anyone . I Wouldn’t let it in your house .

It's a rescue dog. Its probably been abused so it doent know how to show it is distressed before attacking (look up canine ladder of agression) not defending just saying that maybe suggest the help of a behaviourist.

You don't have home insurance?

I'd never have had the dog in after the first time it did it

I'm a dog lover but would not put up with that. Either mother brings a dog crate with her to secure the dog or it doesn't come.

The dog need a specialist trainer.

In the meantime could you use a soft muzzle?

Getting a rescue should be a commitment to the dog, not a cheap way of getting a dog, she’s letting it down.

I have a dog, a very well behaved gentle dog that wouldn't jump at anyone, nor has she ever tried to bite anyone.

I wouldn't though, expect to take her with me to visit anyone in their home.

Your mother needs to face up to the fact that as much as she loves her dog it isn't safe, particularly around children, which would be my biggest concern in your circumstances.

The dog has already bitten, the next bite could be the one that does some serious damage. She can't reasonably expect you to accept an animal into your home that could cause your child harm, it's madness.

You need to be very firm about this and insist you can't have the dog in your home. Surely, she has to accept that your child's welfare comes before her dog.

Could you offer to pay towards kennels or a sitter, if she can't afford it?

Dog = not big. Bigger than a terrier, but smaller than a retriever.

Was rescued from an Irish farm as a puppy and my mother took him when he was about 12-18months old. He has heart problems and takes medication so my mother worries about him a lot and is very protective.

The first time it bit my son I was horrified but my mother acted like it was no big deal - she sort of brushed it off and said “poor dog was scared”. I said back then that it wasn’t safe around kids but my mother basically ignored me and carried on as if nothing happened. She is encouraged by the fact my son weirdly doesn’t seem scared by the dog - although he is now terrified of all other dogs.

Jeez the dog has bitten your children and now you - your Mother’s next. I wouldn’t have it in the house with or without a crate. Your poor lad having to live with that.

What on earth? The dog bit your child and you have allowed it back in your house?? Protect your child, please!

dude the first time it bit your child you should have said to get it out and its never to come back and reported the fucken thing, what if next week shes walking it and it rips a childs face off because it didnt like the look of the child
IT BIT YOUR CHILD... its told you who it is, it is uncontrolled and bites, what more do you need to know, do your job, protect your child

Really don’t understand why you haven’t said it already!
Our PIL dog is the same and they are aware the dog is not welcome at our house and if they want us to visit them it has to be shut out the room.
The kids safety comes first. I’d be miffed at the telly but it’s the safety aspect that would have been an instant red alert

Omg OP yanbu. Never never let this fog her your children.

*dog near your children

Yanbu. I would not have that dog anywhere near my children.

Was her dog adopted through Dogs Trust? Might be worth finding out if they could benefit from their Dog School either way to work through his reactive and aggressive episodes. Probably too late to restore your trust fully even with help now, but it is very hard to live with a dog with emotional problems and it would improve everyone's quality of life.

www.dogstrust.org.uk/help-advice/dog-school/

regardless of him being a rescue, she's had the dog 6-7 years and has made no attempt to train him??!!

• that's mad ( and v unreasonable).

My dog was like this - it took a lot of very careful management and we mostly just avoided taking her anywhere. She was in chronic pain and took a lot of medication too, but that isn't an excuse to let it run riot and hurt people.

Of course YANBU. Definitely you or the dog, if she crates it at home she should bring the crate with her and control the dog, or find alternative arrangements for it when she visits.

My mil is the same. She doesn't understand that I don't want her smelly over excited dog near my kids. It bites if you try and take something off them! And she makes out I'm overreacting when I mention this. I've been very firm. She doesn't like it, but it's your home.