AIBU to not let a random child walk on my garden wall?

[CockysGirl]

Just got in from work and was parking on my drive and a grandparent with a small child (2-3 years old) is lifting them up so that they can walk along my garden wall. They see me standing watching and say "DGC wants to walk on your wall, you don't mind do you?" So I replied, "I'd rather they didn't, it is a tall wall with lots of rose bushes next to it so they may get hurt and anyway, it is my private property" So the grandparent glared at me and huffed loudly and said "the nasty lady won't let you walk on her wall" and proceeded to make a big fuss about lifting DGC off the wall again! AIBU to not want kids walking on my garden wall?

YANBU! Anyone who thinks it’s ok to walk on the wall of a private garden is just weird.

I’m really shocked by how many people think it’s ok...were you dragged up?!

And even if you have no respect for other people’s homes then did you miss the part where OP mentioned that it was a four foot high wall and a toddler?

Working on the principle that I would never have let my DD do it I think YANBU. Yes walking on walls is one of the joys of childhood but usually they're public walls and 4ft high is pretty tall for a toddler, I thought you were going to say it was one of those piddly 1ft jobs that is barely a wall anyway.

@Tyersal Thank you, I did expect some nasty comments though - this is Mumsnet 😉
I'm not a grinch but I think that safety is important - if my wall was only 2ft high i probably would just have told them to be careful but i wouldn't let my kids climb on other peoples walls so hope that others would show me the same courtesy.

yanbu. i really don't get why parents think other peoples property is there to amuse their kids.

I imagine you would be told your wall needed to be lowered if a snowflake fell off...

Bloody hell. What harm was it doing as long as grandma was holding her hand?
Are you able to pinpoint the exact moment you turned into a scrooge, or is it something that crept up on you gradually?
Just curious

YANBU - your wall, your rules. But you are being a misery.

Walking along walls is one of life's great pleasures. If they fall off, they fall off. Scratch themselves on a rose bush, maybe break a branch (but they are pretty sturdy bushes). But they aren't likely to fall off. At that age grandparent will hold them.

As for "what if the wall falls down, then who will they blame? " - your wall should not be so precarious that a 10kg toddler can knock it down!

I have a wall that kids walk on

Bit mean, I bet you walked on walls when you was younger, yabu poor kid wasn't doing any harm

Not on people’s private property we didn’t. We’d never have been allowed to do so, and quite rightly!

No you're not being unreasonable. People saying you are probably wouldn't be happy if kids started traipsing through other parts of their private property, so why is this any different?

I've had to ask parents to stop letting their kids do the same on our front wall. They can't see, but some of the slabs are loose. If their child fell, I'm sure it's our door they'd be banging on. Why take that risk? They also walk through our small front garden, I secretly hope they walk through the shit the neighbour's cat leaves there at times.

How does it affect you? Wouldn't bother me. Different if they come up the drive and start having a game of football (I should say my driveway is only big enough for two cars and isn't really big enough to play football on, but if it were).

I walked on walls when I was a kid, yes it is one of life's pleasures.

were you dragged up

I clearly was by your standards!

This is why I have iron railings atop my wall!

YWBU if the wall was only 2 ft. But a 4 ft wall is quite a fall.

Wow, aren’t you the killjoy!

A toddler walking on your wall holding a grandparent’s hand isn’t going to do any damage nor sustain injuries. Lighten up

I wouldn't have let my kids do it. And I'd be a bit put out (though possibly not brave enough to say so) if people let their kids walk on my wall.
Walls in a public place, fine. But not people's garden walls.

But the grandmother is definitely BU to call you a nasty lady to the child. Jeeeze, what's the matter with people?

One of those things that only English people generally get uptight about, on a par with getting radgy about someone turning around and their back wheel edging on to your drive way or having someone park in front of your house.

YABU

Your garden isn’t a a soft play and nobody is entitled to use it as such. Her shitty attitude would have sealed it for me, and is far worse than you not allowing the little darling to climb on your wall IMO.

What happened to 'If it's not yours, leave it alone', or 'If it's not yours, don't touch it'
Aren't people taught that any more?

YANBU. For the simply reason it's your bloody wall.

reply should have been 'don't worry kid, not all grandmas are as stupid as yours'.

One of those things that only English people generally get uptight about,

That’s rather the sweeping statement. I’m not English nor are any of my family and it’s certainly not acceptable to us.

What happened to 'If it's not yours, leave it alone', or 'If it's not yours, don't touch it'
Aren't people taught that any more?

Apparently not when it’s one of “life’s greatest pleasures”!

YANBU they were the sort of person which if the wall had collapsed or they'd fallen in the rose bushes and hurt themselves would sue you.

At least they know.

When I was very small, our cul de sac had open plan front lawns and a girl and a young woman and older man would let their dog poo on our lawn. My mum who is not known for her diplomatic skills, spotted them and rushed out and told them off. The young woman said "She's deaf", as if this was why she shouldnt be told off ... to which my mum replied "I dont care if she's bloody deaf, I dont want you letting your dog on my lawn and neither do the neighbours!" "You're a horrible old bag". "You take your bloody children and dog and go and poo on somewhere else!" We never saw them again!

your wall, your rules

The ridiculousness of that