To ask for cf pregnancy comments

[3teens]

Out for lunch with my 30w pregnant niece (20) Random woman comes up to commiserate me on my teenage sister being 'in trouble' and asking how my parents feel.
I was livid. Told her I was actually her aunt, have 5dc myself and my neice is married, has her own home and chose to be pregnant.
Reminded me of being in SCBU with my twins 14 years ago and a HCA asking me what she should buy her DD for her 18th bday.
I replied, 'when I turned 18 my parents bought me xyz but that was 5 years back'
HCA was stunned. Thought I was 16.

Meredithgrey1 what a horrible thing to say. Not that it makes a difference but what if you were trying or couldn't have any more?

My DM said “well I’m not buying it anything, I wasted my money last time. “

Last baby SB. I will never understand how she could’ve thought that was appropriate.

@DustyMaiden that's awful, I'm so sorry!

Sadly had to terminate my first pregnancy for medical reasons. I was heartbroken. HCA asked me, after the procedure, if I had "thought about prevention" I was confused and said "of what?" And she replied "This. (gesturing to my tummy) You know. Pregnancy"
Needless to say I made a formal complaint about her. Read my notes, you insensitive cow!!

@DustyMaiden oh my love, that is so fucking awful. Im so sorry.

@DustyMaiden how horrible , I hope your next pregnancy went ok.
I've had all sorts asked . When I was pregnant at 18 my supposedly best friend said 'i thought you had more about you ' ffs contraception failure happens . Needless to say we are no longer close .

A random woman asked me how I could feed my baby such crap. I was about 30 weeks. And I was only eating mini cheddars, not downing tequila

Since getting pregnant I have been asked all the time was it planned? Followed by how will you cope? The worst was MIL telling my husband we'd ruined our lives by having a 3rd but then asking to be present at the birth!

@DustyMaiden I am so sorry, that is an appalling thing to say after what you went through.

A male co-worker asking me if the baby was my husband's. He thought it was hilarious, I didn't. Apparently, hormonal pregnant women can be REALLY offensive and scary. Who knew?

Thanks all, yes my next pregnancy was my lovely DS.

I get called Nanna when out with my 1st daughter in her early 20s and my toddler. it used to offend me but now I laugh.

Although I got a hell of a lot of was it planned when I was pregnant.

I’ve been repeatedly shamed for exercising during pregnancy. Raised judgy eyebrows, pleas of “please just sit down and take it easy,” queries of “are you sure you should be doing that? Why take the risk?”, “don’t you worry about what might happen?” And the oh-so-helpful, “when I was pregnant I loved having the excuse to just sit down and be pampered.” 🙄

I just ignore them all and crack on as I am. It does make me seethe though. I’ve also been told I should get rid of my animals and that I shouldn’t be driving my car as it’s ‘dangerous’. Oh and that I should breastfeed or I’m a negligent mother. Christ.

Why does everyone have an opinion on pregnancy, why do they feel the right to share it and why do they think their opinion matters a jot? Insane.

Are you sure it isnt twins? no I'm just fat...

Was this child planned (no and if they were rude enough to ask I was rude enough to tell them)

I think people do say daft things to new/expectant mothers after my second boy I got asked if I was disappointed he wasent a girl this was by a " friend " who had two girls so I asked her if she was disappointed her second daughter wasent a boy

I was 42 when I had my third child. So many intrusive questions! My favourite was “Did you have help?” Yes. My husband enjoys helping immensely..

It seems having a round belly means you are open to answer questions of a very private nature. MN did teach me to pull a surprised face at such invasive comments and respond with “ Why do you want to know?”

@DustyMaiden That is dreadful. I hope you never spoke to her again.

I was asked 'was it planned' quite a few times when first announcing. I'm usually fine with calling out dickish comments but really couldn't think of anything to say! We had been trying for a year. But still can't believe people feel entitled to that information.

Also had people asking am I going back to work, will I change my hours, am I going to pump so DH can do feeds, etc etc. I understand people are curious but these are all personal things that DH and I need to decide - I'm hardly going to discuss it with random colleagues and relatives before him am I?!

My father when I was 7 1/2 months pregnant with my second child commented “you have got fat” knowing full well I was pregnant. Also my sister came to visit me at the hospital 12 hours after I had given birth with my first child and the first thing she said was “you still look pregnant”

My MIL suggested we double barrel DDs surname. Only with her maiden name instead of mine we were stunned into silence at that one.

A complete stranger at the post office

'OMG your HUGE'

Im 33 weeks pregnant. JUST FUCK OFF.

Not me, but a friend announced she was pregnant (one half of a same-sex couple). Our mutual friend blurted out "Turkey baster, then?" The room fell silent!

@Braan we had identical comments about having another/you'll change your mind.
We havent and ds is 6 now.Fuck off nosey people!

I’ll never get over the cheek of some people.

I often got asked if mine were planned, I had my oldest at 16 but was married in my 20s with the other 2. Even now people will assume we’re sisters and give the most awful look when I say I’m her mum ‘oh you must have had her so young’ nobody’s business really.

A favourite saying round our way was ‘oh has your tv broken’ dh just replied once “nope, it’s just permanently tuned to the porn channel”

When dd3 was just born, a nurse asked us if we’d be trying for a boy now. Dd was in special care and almost died, I was so shocked I couldn’t even answer. Lots of people asked that question over the following years though so had to grow a tough skin.

The only one that comes to my mind was when I was at work one day whilst pregnant with my second. I work in a shop, was suffering with terrible sickness and hadn't eaten in nearly 2 weeks, I just couldn't keep any food down and had a bad back, I was sat down behind the till, as I was advised to do by my physio, when a regular came in the shop and asked for some cigarettes, I struggled to get up and he said "oh come on your pregnant not ill" I could have hit him. I was even more annoyed as he was a father of 3.

I didn't wear my wedding band while pregnant as I had sausage fingers 🙈 got told on 2 separate occasions that it's utterly disgraceful that I was unmarried and pregnant... I didn't think people were still so judgemental in 2018

I’ve been repeatedly shamed for exercising during pregnancy. Raised judgy eyebrows, pleas of “please just sit down and take it easy,” queries of “are you sure you should be doing that? Why take the risk?”, “don’t you worry about what might happen?” And the oh-so-helpful, “when I was pregnant I loved having the excuse to just sit down and be pampered.”

All from other women I'll bet! I was dinghy racing until 6 months and on permanent OOD duties from then onwards, some other women were really, genuinely annoyed because I was far too active and giving the game away!