To not feel sorry for colleague ripped off at strip club?

[Bibbiditybobbidy]

30 year old colleague went to a well known strip club on a stag do, and woke up the next day with £7k missing from bank acct.
He was so drunk it appears he managed to spend all that without knowing. When he complained they sent him evidence of himself ( CCTV) at the bar authorising each transaction, times receipts etc
He parents have had to lend him ££ as he’s at his over draft limit and he’s paying them back.
He’s weeping and wailing about it but I just think he’s been an arse and should learn as lesson AIBU? He’s getting lots of sympathy about the ‘injustice’ of it in the office... but he's exactly the kind of guy to show off in front of his mates playing the big man, while he’s actually a bit of a beta male...I have NO sympathy for him, the little creep!

I wouldn’t really be sympathetic either. I always remember my husband telling me about a guy in his work who went to the lap dancing on a stag and kept getting more and more dances and spent a fortune. He seemed to genuinely think he was in with some kind of ‘chance’. Guy had a fiancé as well.

A PP makes a really good point. How much did his friends enjoy the free drinks and possibly dances? Did they question how drunk he was or whether he could afford it all? Did they try to stop him? How come they didn't rack up 7k bills?

@Herringbone31... it’s illegal to sell an intoxicated person alcohol ... you know it happens every, single day, right?

PanicAndRun I would suspect that far from trying to stop him, they possibly encouraged him to buy drinks & dances 'for the table'. From the OP's description he was very excited to be going on this stag do and possibly got taken for a ride by others in the group.

The claims about being scammed by the club or having a blackout are probably to cover his morning after embarrassment at being treated as such a mug by his so called friends.

@JamieVardysHavingAParty How people choose to interpret a post is their responsibility, as is their choice of how to respond.

That was not my intention. I was speaking directly to an individual about the method of their argument.

I note that nothing has escalated, so I presume Sagrada's army don't want escalation any more than I do.

I want to be in Sagrada's army. Do we get cookies?

@Sadiee88

And your point is?!?

Seemed like it might be a shock to you

Panic

@Sagradafamiliar 'Lots of people agree with me on other threads and I'm boldly sticking with that without anything to back it up'

Strong.

That's absolutely not what I meant and that's a quote you just made up in your own head, but you please yourself. I wouldn't want to get in the way of whatever it is you're trying to do here.

No, hear, your posting consists mainly of defending men and putting down women where you possibly can, it's your only agenda.

Yes, the hooves do make a certain sound. I've been thinking it for a while.

Both from Sagradafamiliar

Are you doing that thing where you take against a poster for disagreeing with you on thread A then pursue them across threads B, C and D to continue castigatIng them?

@Sagradafamiliar Don't, then.

Are you doing that thing where you take against a poster for disagreeing with you on thread A then pursue them across threads B, C and D to continue castigatIng them?

Yes they are.

Apparently you aren't allowed to hold an opinion other than "women are always, always right, even when they are wrong".

Apparently you aren't allowed to hold an opinion other than "women are always, always right, even when they are wrong".

This.

Apparently you aren't allowed to hold an opinion other than "women are always, always right, even when they are wrong".

I disagree- I've given a good explanation why it is perfectly reasonable to think a man who wanted drinks and lap dances is an idiot for having wasted his money, and that this isn't comparable too a woman being raped while drunk because she never went out with the intention of being drunk in the first place.

Conflating the two ignores the intentionality of his actions. The fact that he might have had his 'friends' take advantage makes the situation somewhat more sympathetic, but the basic premise that he went to a strip club for the purpose of purchasing sexualities gratification and alcohol and over spent is not the same as a woman who went out with the intention of drinking and dancing and having fun who gets raped by someone. They're not the same. At all.

Purchasing sexual*

Sleazy guy spend all his money on sexual attention, doesn’t keep track of the amounts, feels angry.

Tough shit, sunshine. Maybe don’t purchase women in future.

Wombat, kind of. I'm doing that thing where I point out someone's clear agenda. Report if you like.

@Sagradafamiliar If someone disagrees with you on similar topics in the same way, every time it comes up, that's not an agenda and more than your opinion is an agenda.

People are entitled to their opinion without being accused of having an agenda all the time. All points of view are allowed to be heard. I don't agree with some stuff you say, bot I'm not cross-thread accusing you of having an agenda, or backing up my opinion by saying other people agree with me.

You're bullying. This isn't a forum for women, as you stated above. I think I'm in agreement with you on this issue, but I still think you're arguing the point very unfairly.

Apparently you aren't allowed to post an opinion other than women are always right even when they are wrong

And there you have it ⬆️
On a thread about a man purchasing women's bodies for a fun night out ffs. Any thread can turn into ways to criticise women when the topic is male misogyny, if you do the right mental gymnastics.

*I think I'm in agreement with you re this thread, I mean.

The irony of your post has made me smile, eckhart.

Please clarify.

I have no wish to be drawn into what you're trying to draw me into, I'm sorry :)