To have blocked the CF?

[Sparklfairy]

I've been seeing a guy for about 4 months. He works a 'normal' job and I work from home, freelance, long and anti social hours. It's not uncommon for me to work overnight, sleep pattern all over the place etc. I've had to put my foot down before with regards to him assuming that because I work for myself that I can have time off whenever I he want(s).

He was supposed to come over last night, but I cancelled due to running late on a work deadline. Said we could do something today in the day. It was left that he would call me in the morning and jokes were made about me likely being dead asleep if it was early and not hearing it etc.

At 6.30 this morning I woke to my phone buzzing. I saw it was him and ignored it, as had only got to bed a couple of hours before.

Then my doorbell buzzed.

I was annoyed that he just rocked up at my house (15 miles from his) at 6.30am with no prior warning. My phone kept ringing so I decided to ignore it. He continued to ring the doorbell, long sustained buzzing 10-12 seconds.

I keep my window which faces the road open most of the time (first floor flat). He shouted through the window "ALEXA! TURN BEDROOM LIGHT ON!" which of course she did. Okay, annoying but maybe, just maybe he was kidding around and didn't think it would work.

Then he shouts, "ALEXA! SET ALARM FOR FIVE MINUTES"

I lost it then. I went to the window, said, 'Well you can fuck off', slammed it shut and locked it.

He then continued to ring me and buzz my doorbell until I threatened to call the police. He then resorted to just yelling up at me from the street

I'm so utterly bewildered that he thinks any of this is normal!? I've blocked him and very firmly told him to fuck off. He's texted saying that I said he could come round (not at 6.30 unannounced I fucking didn't) and if I was clearly asleep why did he think it was okay to force me to wake up? What the fuck.

I've blocked him and never want to speak to him again (but of course am still furious so don't know if it's that). Starting to think maybe I was too harsh...?

What a nutcase. Funny about the Alexa thing but I’m surprised you didn’t chuck a bowl of cold water at him.

Yeah I'm disappointed I didn't think of chucking water. He'd only have used that as an excuse to think I was batshit anyway

He was checking that you were alone. Jealous weirdo loser!!!!

Very funny with alexa but fucking hell OP - what a gobshite. No loss there. Imagine that kind of behaviour in the long-term.

Even if you work regular hours who wants waking up at 6.30am at the weekend

Good point Stuck, I reckon he was checking what you were up to. Or who!

He is definitely an entitled CF, but it WAS funny about the Alexa.

Has he text or phoned you since ?? I'd love to hear how he tried to explain his totally batshit behaviour :)

What a tool!

There’s nothing sadder than a man who’s too keen

Ah he's batshit. Im' chuckling

If my DH wakes me at 6:30 on a weekend morning I have his head. He didn’t attempt it more than a couple of times 🤣 Flaming Nora, what a lunatic.

What a child. I’ve never heard anything like it!!

The Alexa thing is funny but how bloody loudly did he shout for it to hear him, he most have woken the whole street!! What a controlling tosser, you’re well rid.

nowayhose I said 'touch my doorbell again and I'll call the police. Don't contact me again'. Blocked on WhatsApp. He then started calling and texting 'please give me 5 mins' etc. Then I texted saying none of what he was doing was normal and if he called or texted again I would call the police. That's when he started shouting instead

I got a long text saying that I'd said it was ok (I didn't) and he was really sorry and he didn't think alexa would work (then why use her TWICE?) and that he wouldn't contact me again unless I got in touch first. Which give him his due, he hasn't.

I need to have words with Alexa. Traitorous bitch.

He got off light - I'd have set the dogs on him. joking

He sounds crazy. It's not ok to do what he did regardless of whether you've only gone to bed 2 hours before. Even ringing you at that hour on a Saturday morning is not on, 9:30/10 would have been more reasonable, but to turn up at your house unannounced and start yelling up at you and ringing the doorbell is insane. The Alexa thing is borderline psycho! Keep blocked.

Oh and maybe reconsider Alexa's location in your home :D

He seems to be devoid of common sense

Yeah I'm disappointed I didn't think of chucking —water— warm piss

He was supposed to come over last night, but I cancelled due to running late on a work deadline.

I just wondered if this sort of thing has happened a lot, and he feels pushed around by you.

Even if that's it, his behaviour is nuts.
YANBU

*strikethrough fail. Why doesn’t that work on iPhone? 😡

Happityhap it really didn't happen a lot. I've cancelled twice ever and always just made arrangements for the next day. He would have been over so late it would literally have been dinner and sleep anyway.

He's been encroaching on my time more and more, if he comes over he sometimes doesn't leave for 2/3 days, if he's booked a day off he fully expects me to take it off too and spend it with him, and if he could come over every night after work he absolutely would (I live alone, he's with his parents)

I can't get past 6.30am. Even if you'd gone to bed at a 'normal' time.

Did he think he was being 'romantic'?

Who the hell are the 5% who voted YABU? do come out and say why you think the OP is?

So he was looking to be a full time cocklodger seen as you have your own place and he lives with mammy and daddy. You got well rid just in time.

There's a book called, "The Gift of Fear" which talks about the signs someone is abusive. Refusing to take no for an answer over someone having a drink, or even taking a sweet, is an initial red flag. So when you say: It was just so... Pushy. He does try and push/coerce me into doing things his way/by his schedule/gets me to fit in with him with no thought for fitting in with me I think you've dodged a bullet. The Alexa thing is funny - the context is anything but.

Well done you for binning him off. Sadly, I doubt all women will be as clear on his behaviour.

The working hours are a red herring. Even if you were working a regular 9-5 Monday to Friday job, nobody in their right mind turns up on your doorstep at 6.30am on a Saturday morning.