Would you mention kids in dating profiles?

[Shadowcats]

If you are looking to date [for the first time in a decade], do you mention you have a child (a 2 year old) in your [tinder] profile?

I feel like matching is on looks and personality from a bio - baggage is a later convo.

YANBU - no mention
YABU - mention them

I also removed having a child from my personal statement on job applications. I was once asked where my child was three times in a teaching interview (by three different people)!!!!

I met my now DH 14 years ago online, I didn't mention my then 2 year old in my profile, however I did after a week or so of chatting

If you don’t mention in the profile prepare yo be dumped quickly when you do by some. I don’t date men with babies/toddlers so it would be a no thanks as soon as they mentioned it

How do you know when it is the right time to mention children?

I don’t want to leave it too late and mislead, but I also I don’t want to announce them loudly to begin with.

I’ve never OLD before so it’s a bit of a minefield.

No, but mention them once you have passed the WhatsApp gateway, but dont call them baggage...good luck x

I wouldn't for safeguarding reasons. I remember a single mum at a school I worked at who was targeted by a man who specifically wanted access to her young children.

I guess when you know you want to meet them, throw it into conversation. Unless you like them
It’s none of their business

I'd always mention that I'm a parent on any dating profile. Otherwise I'd just feel I'd be getting off on the wrong foot - but I'd not be dating for casual fun where being a parent could be construed as a deal breaker.

I'm at the age now where men my age group either have kids and want no more, or haven't got kids and want someone who doesn't either so they can settle down and do 'firsts'. It's a pretty shite place to be at!

Definately mention. I would be a bit annoyed if I met someone, liked them then found out they had kids.

(I wouldn't put child's age or name, or any photos of me with them though)

@NigesFakeWalkingStick - date someone 5 years younger, then you'll be fine.

If you do as suggested and don’t tell for several dates then you’re being misleading. Maybe don’t mention of profile but definitely before either of you had committed time to a date

My game approach is was to make no mention on my profile and just casually drop it in messages before agreeing to a date. I thought that was the best approach, but now I’m having doubts.

You can but only in passing. 'My job in x, painting, yoga (insert whatever hobbies) and my son/ daughter keep me nice and busy'. Dating profiles should be short and sweet

If you coparent or have shared care you could say at the end of profile "coparent my child so have single time for friendship and to develop potential relationship". You are then saying you're a parent, but want to meet in your single time and so it's upfront, but clear that no early access or involvement with your child. Then in chat you can say you're a parent, but again focus on a single relationship to start with.

No, don’t mention it. You could attract perverts, it’s just not worthwhile. I did OLD as a single parent and I only mentioned it after the first date if I liked them and thought we’d see each other again. There’s no way I’d have mentioned it before then, who even knows who these people are or what they are capable of.

I write dating profiles as part of my life coaching business and mentioning in passing is fine. You need other boundaries in place to safeguard against weirdos. Perverts can be weeded out easily by not sharing your fb or other social media, meeting your dates in a public place and not allowing them to your home or to meet your children until you know them very well. Months not weeks or days.

Never on the profile. It only takes one sick perv using it as a tool to meet parents. I think a lot of blokes that mention it are likely to be Disney dads, using it as a look at me I’m so great at being an adult.

It’s easily dropped into a conversation.. “what are you doing tonight”.. “just having a night in with the kid(s)” or obviously in the tell me more about yourself stage. You can also google their name n town.. sounds dodgy but if they’ve been in the papers for anything it’ll likely pop up, helped my dm weed out a nut job.

Well as my 22 year old said tonight- Tinder isn't a dating app!

**Christ don't use Tinder for dating. You'll get eaten alive.
Met my husband on tinder
Neither of us ate the other alive!

No. Get to know someone personally first, there are all sorts of weirdos around who want 'family life', which is grim. Play it by ear, I presume you're not looking to move in with someone all of a rush so just enjoy being single and dating.

You may meet someone really nice who also has a child and that will change things.

@1Morewineplease OP should NOT mention her toddler in her profiles to avoid attracting pedophiles who specifically target single mothers. It's a thing! Watch SVU

There's plenty of time on a 1st or 2nd date to mention it but at least you've screened out the first level predators. If anyone gives you hassle then tell 'em why its not in your profile. They don't get it walk away & don't look back.

I have noticed lots of men do profile mention it; part disclosure part to look sensitive, but they generally are not worried about women dating them to attack their kids.

Also tinder is a dating app, either that or I need to tell my partner he’s just a short term fling

I thought it was the go to site for hook ups?

Far too many peadophiles out there, who are master manipulators. Not easy to spot. I really wouldn’t say you have children. It’s not worth the risk.