To those who drink 3-4 bottles of wine per week

[prayerbeforebed]

Can you cope with everyday life the next day and are you comfortable with your intake?
Is it too much ? Is your health affected ?
I find that I am using wine as a crutch since my shock split from husband and subsequent discovery of an affair.
I drink three bottle is wine per week when I did used to enjoy one . I don't want anymore but I find it completely relaxed me and gives me a little buzz of happiness in anitherwise difficult time.
I don't want to ruin my health but I feel a bit guilt.
Thanks

I drank this amount through a particularly shit time in my life. But it was only for about 4 months, it did help me get through it.
I think the key thing is to make sure it does not creep up. You are not physically dependent at this level of drinking, but you can be if you let it creep up.
As things start to become a bit easier, start cutting down. I found rather than bottles of wine, boxes are better. Because I found it easier to have a small glass of wine from a box. With a bottle it is easy on the second night of it being open just to polish it off. I also bought some old wine glasses from a charity shop that are much smaller than the glasses you buy now. That made it easy to cut down as I had one glass a night - which was about 1/6th of a bottle.

For the posters that are saying this ok, don’t be hard on yourself etc.....PLEASE ffs consider this. Alcohol is a depressant. The OP has had a shitty time yes. A bottle here and then to numb the shock etc I get. But habitual necking of many bottles will only worsen her depression and ability to bounce back as a person. Alcohol isolates people....the illness of alcoholism thrives on isolation, this will not help her.
Kick the bloody booze, get AD’s or therapy and move forward.

A cholesterol specialist consultant once asked me if I drank a lot. I asked what he meant by “a lot” and his reply was 1 bottle of wine in an evening. I use that as my bench marker. Yes your wine intake has increased but so would mine in your situation

I know someone with liver damage from drinking a bottle of wine a day.

Dear god.

I drink some around that much, probably more, and certainly in the short term I don't find it to be a problem.

You see, it's not even the amount, but THIS is the problem

Eh? Why's that a problem say anymore than someone looking forward to a bar of chocolate or their dinner? Looking forward to something isn't a problem for God's sake. That's taking it too far.

Op, you're drinking too much and using it as a crutch. But the fact you've four nights free a week is a positive.

Maybe try to cut it down, as in don't drink a whole bottle...

The A&E’s in this country are stuffed full of people with alcohol dependancy related crisis.....don’t be one of them OP. Quit. Do “No Beer for a Year” or AA. This illness can become chronic and progressive.

Yes, fine. I only drink on the weekends. Maybe 3 glasses of wine over the course of cooking dinner, a meal, relaxing in the evening on Friday and Saturday. Maybe a gin as well or sometimes have a few glasses at Sunday lunch. That probably adds up to 3-4 bottles over the course of 3 days.

It’s fine for me. I don’t drink during the week except for maybe a very rare special occasion (birthday, work dinner, etc).

I honestly don’t really know anyone who doesn’t drink a few glasses of wine or beers or gin and tonics on a Friday/Saturday/Sunday, unless they’re pregnant or driving. Like I literally don’t know a single person who opens a bottle of wine but doesn’t finish it in a weekend (maybe these people only exist on MN?).

But if your drinking is wearing you down, no harm in stepping back for a bit. I went through a spell when I was having some health issues and fatigue and some weekends, I just went to bed early and didn’t drink and it was really what I needed.

Such ignorance here on this thread. The amount is not that relevant unless she’s intending to drive a car, care for kids or operate heavy machinery! The main point is whether or not she psychologically NEEDS what she’s drinking. If she can take it or leave it - no problem. If she needs it, she has an issue that needs sorting pronto.

It's double the weekly allowance and does put you at risk of alcohol related disease. It's one of those things, many people will drink this and be fine, some won't. You aren't really at physical dependency levels yet, assuming you aren't 40kg. But certainly this is not a good path to be on.

I'd try cutting back. Have at least two dry days a week, and add in new ways to treat yourself: long baths (I know, I know..), good mood and some fun. Get some delicious non alc drinks in and eat a fab dinner that doesn't go brilliantly with wine.

And take some b vits.

I think there's no sense in looking for a problem where there doesn't appear to be one. A lot of people in your situation would take anti-anxiety meds under the supervision of doctors, and i think that would set someone up far worse than relaxing with a moderste weekly amount of wine. I think you're fine.

Ok and thanks for responses. I've had a really good think about this over lunch break and being honest with myself I realise that I don't crave it: need it or am
Agitated without it.
What I am is a person who looks forward to it, to the taste/ to the effects/ to what it symbolises etc if that doesn't sound crazy.
So tonight is Friday, I've had wine tues, weds and Thursday but don't fancy it tonight as I'm away tomorrow morning for the weekend . I will be out for a quick dinner tomorrow evening so will have two glasses with dinner and then home to bed . Nothing on Sunday s my work weeks starts on Monday and Sunday's are always busy.
I appreciate all your posts . I'm going to forego alcohol until tonight week besides the two glasses with dinner tomorrow and see how I feel physically mentally etc .

I drink maybe one, but also beer if I go to the pub (maybe 2-3 pints a week) it's probably too much, but it tastes nice

Prayerbeforebed - just bear in mind that binge drinking once a week is actually less good for you than drinking every other night, as your liver has to work harder to re-create the enzymes needed to detox the alcohol if it's had too much of a rest in between exposure. Regular low level drinking allows the liver to keep a reserve of those detox enzymes at the ready so it can clear it quicker.

@Bakedbrie

Such ignorance here on this thread. The amount is not that relevant unless she’s intending to drive a car, care for kids or operate heavy machinery!

No offence, but you are talking a load of shit.

As for this bit.....

The main point is whether or not she psychologically NEEDS what she’s drinking. If she can take it or leave it - no problem. If she needs it, she has an issue that needs sorting pronto.

Many people - including me - have said this FGS.

The cancer risk of drinking this much would worry me.

I think if anyone can say
I drink too much
Acknowledge that Fact
And then consciously cut down and have alcohol free stretch / that’s a great step forward

I don’t want to quit , but I want to control it

Trouble is you get used to the buzz it's giving you, and after a while the buzz diminishes, leaving you in need of another bottle.
The 3/4 bottles become 5/6 then 6/7 and so on.
I couldn't do it, especially if I thought it was needed to get me through.
If you drink it every night OP and you need it, you better see your gp as you could be an alcoholic.

I was a 3-4 bottles per week person, then went completely alcohol free for 18 months. Honestly, it took up to three months to get it out of my system and feel mentally better. Physical benefits like sleeping better, no headaches came straight away.

I convinced myself I could moderate so started drinking red wine (not my previous drink) in the latter half of 2019. Fell into a new habit and was more regularly drinking after a couple of months.

I'm back on the wagon now and have nearly finished Dry January. I would highly recommend stopping drinking for 90 days if you can, so you can feel the full benefits and decide for you.

I would be very aware how alcohol negatively effects your mood/anxiety after the initial buzz you get at the time. Look up Catherine Gray, The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober. I really enjoyed that audiobook and it gave a British perspective compared to Annie Grace in America.

PS I'm a member of Dry January and Beyond group on Facebook. Excellent support and a lot of people have been drinking at that level so would be able to offer more advice.

Such ignorance here on this thread. The amount is not that relevant unless she’s intending to drive a car, care for kids or operate heavy machinery!

Such ignorance yourself. The amount is extremely relevant to health!

I've drunk half a bottle of wine virtually every night for 25 years (apart from pregnancy and breast feeding).
We recently decided to buy the best quality box wine we could find online, so that we could enjoy it. I now have 1 glass (175ml) a night. I don't go to the box to get more, but with the bottle, we both just ended up finishing it.
The difference is that I now don't feel my heart pounding as it copes with my body processing the alcohol during the night.

I've never drunk that much in a week, but I did notice last year that my wine intake was slowly increasing. Like you, that's my main alcoholic beverage, aside from a G & T about twice a year.

So, I stopped buying wine for home consumption and now limit myself to a glass or two when I'm out. It's made a huge difference as I'm always looking at the price or sharing a bottle with friends, none of whom are big drinkers. This week, for example, I've had two glasses of wine, because I only went out twice (stuck to water after the wine). It's three or four per week if I take a bottle to a friend's house, but I'm too tight to pay bar/restaurant prices for many drinks!

I think your plan to have a couple with dinner is a good one, it turns it into an occasional treat, not a regular indulgence.

I probably go through that a week with 2-3 nights off.
Don't usually finish a whole bottle until maybe a Friday night.
I don't feel dependent and certainly not hung over at all.
I find I drink red wine far slower.
If you have 4 nights off a week and enjoy it then I don't see a real problem with this.
But that's just me - maybe I too have a problem!?

I realise that I don't crave it: need it or am. Agitated without it.

Stop drinking and see if that happens

You've started a thread about your intake, I would presume you are worried about it.

You say you don't crave alcohol but enjoy the effects of alcohol, kinda goes hand in hand doesn't it?

If you aren't bothered about NOT drinking you'd not talk about when you are allowing yourself your next drink, you just wouldn't be bothered. Sounds like a big ol crutch to me.

Pack it up for a couple of months and see how you feel and if packing it up totally seems hard ... there is the answer.