Downside of dog ownership

[TheFastandTheCurious]

A colleague's husband wants a puppy, colleague doesn't, I've told her to not even consider getting one if they don't agree on it. She wants her husband to understand why she doesn't want one and the downsides of dog ownership, I have a dog and as much as I love her, I wouldn't get another. They both work full time. She wants me to get a list together to show the cons and so far I have cost - including food, insurance, vet bills etc., dog hair everywhere, giving up a lot of time to train, toilet training, not being able to leave the dog for long periods, what will they do when they want a holiday, who is going to train it, what will they do when at work.

He wants to just go and buy a Golden Retriever, I've said any reputable breeder would have a waiting list and he'd potentially be getting one from a BYB or farm.

What else am I forgetting?

She is BU for expecting another adult to 'put together a list' for her- crikey it's a dog not a rare animal that requires a specialist and there must be endless articles online about this ss well as sage advice from the likes of the RSPCA and dogs trust.

Nobody working full time should really be getting a dog unless they have and can afford decent arrangements for it during the day. As a huge dog lover I still think there are more practical cons to owning a dog than there are pros. They are a lot of expense and effort, lots of cleaning and a massive adjustment for those who like to holiday, go out a lot etc. Regardless of the perceived quality of a breeder (who are ultimately interested in money rather than welfare) any dog can have behavioural issues that make all of the above even harder. A perfectly behaved dog is hard work and those are rare and require extensive training and socialization done early.

So many reasons for not getting a dog and yet so many people who have a dog (or several).... And very often, when people loose their dog, they very often go to get another one....

The guilt, when you realise you can't give your dog what it needs, because you didn't fully consider the implications. and he/she doesn't understand why it's being re homed.

Some can be very destructive if left for too long. Our lab chewed a computer power cable and a couple phone chargers (thankfully we turn all off when not used) scratch marks on walls furniture. The bruises you get when your over excited lab wacks you with their wip of a tail. One of the kids got a bruise under their eye and had to explain it at school.

Cost: you can do all the research and still have a pup with problems. Theres the ongoing cost of vaccinations and good quality food and neutering as a minimum.

Its incredibly tying. They have to have company, training and walking. It's rare that this can be skipped on a daily basis

Kennelling if you go away. Can be stressful and so expensive.

It's a long commitment.

Puppy stage can be destructive. Even if it's just the toilet training they can destroy shoes and furniture. You have to be on board with this as its incredibly frustrating

They both work full time? It would be very cruel to leave a puppy alone all day. They need human interaction. Is he willing to pay for full time doggy day care for the first 18 months and then a dog walker for a couple of hours a day?

I love dogs but only at a distance. I grew up with one and in my twenties I had two Dobermans then in my thirties I had a Staffordshire Bull Terrier. She was a rescue dog very needy ref thunderstorms. I did know this when I got her but I was working full time and the dog needed more attention so in the end I got her rehomed which worked out fine. Yes the guilt isn't good.

As I hate endless fresh air walks and mess/dirt I know I wouldn't have a dog again. They never grow up although they are wonderfully loyal they are always needy and at least children although they bring their own demands and needs they do grow up and ultimately leave home.

A puppy is the same as a toddler to my mind.

The biggest down side for me is not being able to go away spontaneously and worrying about being away from dd2 who has separation anxiety and follows me everywhere. We went abroad last October and he stayed with a dog boarder but was very upset for some time after and came back with fleas which then passed to our other dog. My dad is happy to have dd1 who is older and less boisterous but not dd2. I don't want to leave him again but that means never having a holiday abroad again unless one of my adult children is around to care for him. I work four days a week and my kids are around a lot of the time and dd2 has a dog walker who he loves but I still feel incredibly guilty leaving him to go to work and always rushing home for him ! I can cope with the huge amount of hair, the expense, the walks, the mess and the mud but it's the fact that even a day trip has to result in major planning as to whether he can come with us that really gets me.

It’s also better not to use doggy day care until the puppy is older, so will he take a month or two off to look after the dog or pay for a full time dog sitter until then?

Regardless of the perceived quality of a breeder (who are ultimately interested in money rather than welfare)

Just wanted to pick up on this point - truly responsible breeders aren't interested in money over welfare. The best breeders' motivation for breeding is to try a particular combination of bloodlines together in the hope of improving the breed, often involving trying to eradicate breed-specific health conditions that less ethical breeders - or, to be fair, those breeding before such conditions came to be recognised - have bred in previously. Those breeders tend to have long waiting lists as they breed few litters, and will keep a puppy rather than let it go to an unsuitable home.

That's the kind of breeder everyone who is unable or unwilling to rehome a rescue dog should be looking for, but it takes more patience than most people are prepared to have, hence one of the reasons why backyard breeders, puppy farms and breeders of 'designer' crossbreed continue to thrive.

Advise her to tell him that, if he really wants the companionship of a dog, he can sign up to ‘borrow my dog’ or one of the charities that does volunteer dog walking for those in need. He has the evenings (I assume) and weekends off and he can spend that free time caring for dogs for those that need help. If he says he doesn’t want to spend his time doing that, then ask him what he intends to do with his own dog when he can’t be bothered walking it every day, after work and twice a day at weekends.

That the life expectancy of a dog is less than a human so one day they are going to break your heart.

She should show him all the ads on Preloved etc of these poor dogs being sold because of work commitments, having to move somewhere unsuitable, chronic illness, not having time for him and the new baby, relationship breakdowns etc.

Dogs are big commitments, I've had mine for ten years, and luckily she has adjusted to children okay, though she had to go and stay with my folks for three months when my son with ASD went through a stage of being violent to her. If I'd not had that option, I would have had to rehome her.

That the life expectancy of a dog is less than a human so one day they are going to break your heart

This

Wish I'd asked this Q before I got a dog. I love him and is well cared for but my god it's a lot of work and a huge commitment.
If they are going to have a dog, they need to give their all to love and care for him.

After my 13 year old Lab died I waited a year and got a 10 week old puppy. I did not remember how hard it was.
The puppy would piss on the carpet (even though he'd been out for a wee 5-10 mins earlier), would poo inside (and outside) and then eat it.... He would also then bite (playfully) and scratch (after eating the poo, which was gross).

My old dog was fine until a year before he died, and he then had separation anxiety and couldn't ever be left. He if was, even for 10 mins, he would howl and cry. Lots of complaints from neighbours, and we paid hundred to dog behaviourists but nothing worked.

There's also having flexibility if you want to go out or away. We would always have my Mum to 'dog sit' but she then got a dog so couldn't, and it really effected what we could and couldn't do. Forget being spontaneous!

And there's the dog walks, at least 2 a day. Training. Food. Insurance.

The puppy was harder than my 2 year old.

Poo, Poo and more Poo. But mainly the Poo.

Otherwise they are lovely.

The fact that they both work FT is the biggest reason. The cost of doggy day care is almost the same as childcare. Even dog walkers aren't enough when they are little.

We would love a dog, but it isn't fair if we aren't at home.

Dogs are amazing but intense. Cats are far easier for a working family to handle.

We have a 3.5 year old lab. When we got her as a puppy we had a lot of discussions and once we had both agreed, we had a 6 month cooling off period before actually buying.
We both worked full time at that point, however she could accompany me on occasion to the office, and the rest of the time she would either go to the wood yard with my husband 90% of the time. The rare times she was left home I would be home in lunch break to walk her, and our neighbour would.pop in.

I love her, but now we have a toddler, another baby on the way it's hard work. She can no longer go to work with my husband, and so when I work (very different job now) she either has to come and sit in the car or stay with my parents.
I feel guilty that she's not getting the walks she needs because physically I cannot walk that far with PGP and toddler, so it's left to my husband once he's finished work which cuts down on time he and our son get to spend together during the week.

Vets bills can be high, but as long as you get good insurance I don't think it's a huge burden. Cost of food is bigger...I grew up with retrievers and obviously having a lab, it's a lot of money every week/month.

You have to think long term when you get a dog...where will you be in 2 years, 5 years, 10 years etc. How will lifestyle change? What will you do if you want to go away?

If both members of the couple aren't in agreenest...don't get a dog. It's not going to work.

Puppy - pee and poo everywhere to start - unless you are really good at taking out every 20mins and waiting till they go (rain or shine). Taking out in middle of night to pee. Dealing with barking and crying at night if they are going to be heartless and use a crate downstairs. Prepare for weeks/months of sleepless night. Puppies BITE when teething, also possibly VERY destructive if left (which they shouldn’t be, unless gradually acclimatised to it).

Adult dog. Walking EVERY day rain or shine, in sickness and in health, no day trips to non dog friendly places - unless you have a dog sitter, ditto weekends away/hols abroad. Not all dogs take to kennels, and they are VERY expensive. High cost of insurance which is necessary. Or come an accident/genetic fault eg hip dysplasia, you could end up with a bill of 10K.
Muddy feet, hair everywhere, need for LOTS of time training.
Anxiety and fear - if you love your dog this is a whole new world of panic - if dog ill/hurt/gets lost. (If you don’t love your dog, what the hell is wrong with you?).

If your colleague doesn’t really want a dog. She MUST NOT get one. I adore dogs, but it can be hard work if you do it properly. You sacrifice a lot of freedom, peace of mind, money, time.

To get an idea, they could use the Borrow my Doggy service. Or contact a rescue and offer to foster a dog. But ideally unless EVERYONE is committed, don’t do it!

Oh, my friend boards and walks dogs and she said the biggest nightmare she has had thus far was a 10 month old GSD owned by two full-time workers who spends most of his time in a crate and doesn't get enough walks/stimulation - she won't have him again, even though she looks after a lot of rescue dogs (they're her passion and a local charity recommends her) and is used to working round their foibles and quirks. People who get big/active breeds and then don't fulfill their needs are cruel.

We'd never get a pup again due to the work. I have 2 dogs now and they're still a lot of work but the biggest issue is that we can't be spontaneous and stay somewhere. We have to be home/plan dog walkers/put them in kennels and good Kennels are not cheap.

One of our dogs is very high needs /scares easily and as such we can't leave her that alone which restricts us workwise

The huge downside for me has been the effort and stress caused trying to socialise my dog.
Ddog is skittish, unpredictable and a huge ball of energy when off lead. He gets so excited and wants to play with other dogs but doesn't seem to know how to be calm and taking him out is a huge anxiety twice a day.
Training does work yes but essentially you fo not know the dogs true personality until you've invited it into your home.

It's like being trapped.

I never wanted dogs. Dh and dd did.

I was worn down by them. Now we have four.

Every day they need a walk. Every day they make mess. A lot of mess.

Needless to say dh and dd do fuck all for the dogs.

Kennels are so expensive particularly with four dogs so we can't go on holiday.

I don't hate the dogs. It's not their fault but I am properly fucked off that I am trapped by their needs and mess.

The only bad thing I'd say is that they don't live long enough, and when they die your heart breaks. I'd always have at least one dog though.