To want to somehow stop Dd from joining the army

[Witchonastick]

Dd is currently y11.
Her choices for A-level are quite academic and at the moment its borderline if she’ll get the GCSEs to be able to do those subjects.

She’s told me her back up plan if she doesn’t make the grades is to join the army!

I know it’s possible to to have a good career within the army, but she’s talking about infantry.

Normally I’d never want to stop her doing whatever she wants to do, but the army?
And infantry?

I could cry with worry over this, but it how or if I could talk her out of it.

She'll have to pass basic infantry training of course. Training for women would be less stringent than for men, but still very demanding. Although I think most recruits do pass basic training, most people who apply to join get rejected.

Although if she should happen to get in to the army I wouldn't worry about her being put into action as a combat soldier. The UK is never going to use women as combat soldiers. In any modern army most solders serve in support roles anyhow.

But I'd reconsider law a career option too. As well as being a very demanding career to study for, the profession is glutted with underemployed lawyers.

Oh and it’s not full of Man-child’s as a PP said most ex forces are hands on with childcare and housework and they don’t think of it as “helping out” as in the forces it’s not seen as women’s work.

Dd joined the navy, they have an officer programme from 18

@Scott72 why wouldnt they, if they pass the infantry course at catterick and join a infantry battalion, why wouldnt they use them

Young relation of mine joined as an infantry squady a few years ago (no a levels) and has just got a 1st class degree....has been given brilliant educational options by the army....just saying, if she’s bright & keen they’ll give her the opportunity to succeed!

There are a lot of things she can do between a law degree and being in the infantry.

The army completely ruined my brothers life i would not ever advise anyone to join.

He's 35 with liver failure not long left to live. He fought in Iraq 3 times and Afghanistan twice. He had zero help in the army with PTSD or when he came out so turned to drink.

He used to be the fittest healthiest loveliest person i know and growing up i was incredibly proud to be his little sister, i now no longer recognise him as his former self and it's heartbreaking.

Please definitely discourage her

Training for women would be less stringent than for men

Nonsense. There are the same requirements for all.

I don't think Britain is actually at war with anyone at the moment, and is unlikely to be involved in a full scale war with anyone anytime soon. Furthermore female soldiers tend to be kept away from the frontline as much as reasonably possible. So I think your fears here are largely unfounded.

Totally outdated. Im in the Army and was very much 'front line' in Afghanistan due to my job role (it wasnt infantry)

As someone in the Army, I would really encourage her to look at the broader Armed Forces. I think RAF is much nicer, and tend to be better at man management.

I’d bribe her to put it off until she’s 18 and hope like hell she found something else to do.

Training for women would be less stringent than for men, but still very demanding

Also incorrect. The level is the same, hence the low pass rate for females.

Pretty sure for infantry training, the level is the same for both women and men and rightly so, its the sort of job everyone has to be at the same standard

If she's interested in law, it would be worth exploring alternative routes in, e.g. being a legal executive or a legal apprenticeship.

It'll be hard for you, but if she really wants to do it she wants to do it.

I'd say do understand, and make sure she understands, that she could be deployed to combat zones. She could die, she could come back hurt. The risk is small - for example out of 46,000 British servicemen and women deployed to Iraq, 179 lost their lives. But don't assume it don't happen.

DH was in the Army and has categorically said that if DS shows any inclination to join he will do everything in his power to dissuade him.

For me, I simply couldn't countenance it. It's not about expecting others to defend the nation, it's more about sending my son to somewhere nothing to do with us to be pointlessly blown to pieces at the whim of some politician.

My son's school has the CCF, he's too young at the moment but if the permission forms come home there is absolutely no way DH or I will be signing them. There is something fundamentally wrong in putting children in military uniform and giving them guns.

You can meet the army at careers events like The National Apprenticeship show - you would be surprised at the great opportunities they offer. Perhaps have a look into it?

I did 17 yrs in the RAF -absolutely fab career

I get you OP, my son used to talk about doing this and it’s a scary prospect. He changes his mind all the time tho so chances are she will too

What's not to like. Get a career. And an education. See the world. Get paid. No debt and random drug testing.

I think the big problem is that, whilst just about every other job is governed by H&S considerations (preventing eye damage from looking at screens, training to climb ladders safely etc.), this is the one job where they make it clear that you could be expected to die in fulfilling your rule.

I agree with OP - I'd be distraught if a child of mine wanted to join the army; also with the PP who commented about the rich elites getting even more of what they want whilst ordinary folk bear all of the risk on their behalf.

If you want to do travel without combat, the merchant Navy is an option

“ Oh and it’s not full of Man-child’s as a PP said most ex forces are hands on with childcare and housework and they don’t think of it as “helping out” as in the forces it’s not seen as women’s work.”
Having served with many a man child I stand by my comment. Grown men unable to make it to the toilet after a few shandies and acting out because they’ve been put on a duty I’m they didn’t want Wasn’t insinuating a woman’s job was to clean and look after the superior man. But I’ll bet you my last rolo she’ll be picking up a broom more than she will a rifle

I think it shows initiative that she has a back-up plan at all!

I have to say, even as an Irish person who has nothing but contempt for the British army, but you're her mother, she's English why would u
not support her?

I think there is a college course for anyone considering joining either the forces, police or fire service, they get work experience as part of the course. If she would only expect to get low grade A levels, would she be better off doing that before making her decision?

Everyone I work with is serving or former serving army. The fusilier- infantryman- definitely has the most dangerous service record out of everyone- and they've all seen active service in warzones. The military offers fantastic opportunities if you can take them; I know people who've done a lot more than was ever expected of them because of the military- but you have to want to be there and know what you want out of it. I'd also suggest RN or RAF over Army, much as I love my colleagues! I think these services offer more opportunity, are better for women and have more going on, although the army do a lot more around the world than perhaps you realise - it's just not necessarily the traditional image of combat.

I'd suggest seeing what gcses she gets and see how that affects her a-level choices before she decides anything. Good grades are a real boon, open more doors and could make Forces legal services a possibility- military could sponsor her through uni, which might be a good motivator. Is she an ACF or a CCF cadet? If CCF, will she keep it up or still be somewhere that has a cadet corps for VI form? I'd get her to talk to her instructors, if she hasn't already, alongside going through the motions with careers services. See if they can advise her or at least talk to her more honestly about life in the forces.

It's not for everyone, I know people made by the military and people broken by the military, make sure she understands the risk and that it could be her, no matter how slim the chance.