To be fed up with getting told off every time I go to the dentist?

[ElderAve]

I'm 50 this year and I don't have any fillings. There's nothing wrong with my teeth. I eat a balanced diet hardly any sweets and no fizzy drinks (main because I've never liked them). I'm also probably just a bit lucky with my teeth.

I brush regularly but find flossing really uncomfortable so rarely do it. I see the hygienist three times a year to get rid of any build up.

Every time I go to the dentist or the hygienist, I get another lecture about brushing and flossing. I know technically it's just advice but the tone is definitely "telling off".

Really, I'm a 50yo adult who's teeth are in remarkably good condition, I can't be getting it that badly wrong. And if I do have any failings, I pay these people handsomely to deal with it!

Actually, by this stage in life, I'm not at all convinced such regular visits are necessary, but obviously no dentist is going to tell me that.

I've just changed dentists (mainly to use an NHS one rather than private) but the hygienist at the old place used to talk to me like this. And demo with a toothbrush on a model of some teeth how to brush them! I was always expecting her to give me a sticker chart to mark off that I brush them twice a day (which I always do!!). I

I have bad teeth and bad gums. Pregnancy and breastfeeding just seemed to wreck them. I use an electric toothbrush, I use interdental brushes, I have had hygienists show me step by step what they want me to do in case I'm missing something, I do everything you're supposed to do and yet I still spend a lot of time at the dentist post-babies getting stuff fixed. And I get lectured every bloody time, and it's never even useful lecturing which could help me. It's just (and I quote) "I know we keep going on at you to brush your teeth but it really is soooo important."

Meanwhile DH, who can hardly be arsed to spend more than 8 seconds brushing his teeth and has never flossed in his life, has perfect teeth. Same dentist showers him in praises for his great dental hygiene. Drives me bonkers.

My teeth are dreadful as I was 21 visiting one for the first time but they never make me feel bad (except the physical pain itself) they must have pretty low standards

I’ve never been convinced with the advice of stripping between tightly packed teeth with floss and picks

I never found flossing much good, tended to be a bit like using cheese wire on my gums. Then I found interdental brushes and when I see the hygienist she always says how great my brushing is. Is that worth a try?

My dentist told me off for using an electric toothbrush because it had worn my gums away - you can't win!

I have no advice except to say mine is the same. I put up with it because she is actually a nice woman, but I do find her patronising and I do feel like I'm being told off. I am in my fifties and still have all my teeth so I think I'm doing something right! It's a private dental surgery so I often just lie there thinking "just provide the (expensive) serivce I'm paying for and shut up."

Thought it was just me. My teeth stain badly but I think not drinking water is probably the cause. I really only drink tea and water at the gym. I use the interdental brushes but they don’t seem to help. My gums are fine and don’t bleed.

Those of you that use a water closet can you recommend which one you use? I looked into it before and there’s a couple of different types and I got a bit overwhelmed.

I changed my dentist for this reason. Small fortune to get poked, prodded and told off, no thanks.

I received a lecture from the hygienist once. Drinking too much tea and coffee blah blah

I told her it's a good thing I did as if everyone had perfect teeth she'd be out of a job.

I don't need a lecture from someone I'm paying £40 for 15 minutes.

Flosser not closet

I have pretty good teeth, I'm 57, I get the same and I'm bloody sick of it. I'm not a child.
I'm an NHS health professional and NEVER lecture anyone, I just suggest self care and if they want to take my advice they can and if not then that's ok too. They are adults and a lecture will more likely mean they don't come and see me at all.
I'm seriously ready to tell my hygienist to fuck off.

I hear you op.
My usual dentist is ok but the stand in while she was on mat leave
wouldn't let me leave without a patronising lecture...he went on and on.
There was no need for it especially as dentists and a max fax surgeon have made massive balls ups of my teeth and jaw that I suffer the consequences of every day of my life.

Think it must be taught in dental school, it's endemic.

I hear you it puts me off going.
It is even worse now everyone is expected to have a Hollywood smile or at least strive towards it. Teeth can tell a story. My front at fine but have issues with the back ones due to health issues as a teen.
No other health professionals speak down to their patients like a dentist. You feel like a naughty child.

Our old dentist seemed to thrive off making comments that could go either way. So 'your teeth are in great condition - for someone your age' or 'do you use sunscreen with SPF in it on your lips? Well you should' - Dh and me would see who came out most insulted. She was a damn sight more thorough than the exceptionally nice guy we had before though.

@ElderAve

Everybody gets a lecture so take no notice. I haven't visited the dentist for about 3 years and I expected and telling off but no my teeth are ok and I don't need any treatment .... shock!

Why are you going three times a year?

I'm in the US and even my dentist doesn't expect me to go that often. They also don't harass me about how I brush or floss. They just clean my teeth, X-ray them and look at them, and tell me to carry on as I am. I go twice a year.

The lack of respect actually for health care professionals on this thread is quite shocking. You are patients not customers - a dentist/hygienist isn't there to do what you what they are there to treat you.

Realistically OP if you aren't flossing you aren't taking good care of your teeth. And you don't like it when the dentist tells you that. If you had good oral hygiene they wouldn't need to lecture you, because there would be nothing to clean off and nothing to see.

I try not to lecture my patients, but at the same time I wouldn't be doing my job if I just let you neglect your teeth.

If we don't give oral hygiene advice in 5/10 years time we will get the "no one told me I would get gum disease if I didn't floss"

No I haven't been for 3 years

that was to @HoldMyLobster

I have one that always tells me off for eating sugar. It's my only vice and I've never had tooth decay so I wish they'd stop.

Needing to see a hygienist three times a year to get rid of build up shows what a poor job you’re doing!

Orangeshark, I see a private hygienist and pay a lot for it. I consider myself a customer.

Also everyone on this thread is blaming dentists/maxfacs surgeons whatever for their tooth problems. Whilst there have been unethical dentists the chance that everyone's teeth are fucked up because of poor dentistry is very low.

People acting like perfectly reasonable advice is a lecture. Yes if you done want your teeth to stain you have to avoid coffee/red wine/tea. Literally that is what is staining your teeth. Yes of course you should wear spf on your lips or you risk skin cancer.