Birthday girl's mum sending me rude messages! AIBU?

[ReasonNorTreason]

DS was invited to a party with a theme of 'ballerinas or pirates'.

I sent DS as a ballet dancer (as he does dancing), in his usual leotard, shorts, tights and ballet slippers. It's a very friendly community and no 'sissy' comments or opinions as far as I know. DS got nothing but compliments from other parents, children were just excited to see him and no child commented on his outfit.

Anyway, just received a message 10 minutes ago saying the following

"So! You really had to put Joseph in something else didn't you! Why couldn't you stick to the theme? I think it's just unfair, if I'm honest. Not impressed. You aren't fucking sane".

AIBU to 1. Have dressed DS the way I did, and 2., think she must be drinking right now?

I'll be honest and say I'm annoyed at her text but really quite nervous to see her again at the nursery. What baffles me the most is we arrived with a friend who's DD wore a princess outfit and friend explained the situation that she just put on what she could grab - The woman who's text me just laughed and said not to worry at all! I assume she didn't say anything to me right then as DS still had his coat on when he arrived

Totally agree even if she’s technically right who on Earth is so bad shit crazy and rude that they would send such a message. Height of bad manners and extremely graceless towards someone who was effectively her guest.

Blame it on the stress of the party. The last children's party I had, it took at least two years in therapy to stop the eye tick, and the continual brushing off of imaginary food and children's dragging hands😜

Regardless of the invite saying ‘Ballerinas/Ballet Dancer & Pirates’

THEY’RE 3YRS OLD!! Who blinking cares what the dress up as.

OP, batshit crazy mum is miffed that more parents commented on how lovely your son looked more than they commented on how lovely birthday girl looked. We have a mum like that at school, her DD had a party on saturday - horrendous 🤦🏼‍♀️

Reply
I really don't understand your message and will presume that you are just having a bad day.

Then in a smaller font a little lower put
AA helpline xxxxxxxxx
Anger Management helpline xxxxxx

This isnt about her primitive attitude to male dancers but her feeling that her little sugar plum princess wasn’t the centre of attention.

I still think that she is a scary Mary though.

Does she wear. MAGA cap?

Laughed at VivaLeBeaver s reply
Always thought it was bat shit crazy but after some thought and a chuckle think that bad shit crazy might actually be worse and more accurate (depending what / if she uses) 🍀

she would see just how fucking insane I can be
yeah but come on, this mean girl probably has a gun in her handbag (purse?)

he invited the team he was working with out for drinks and one (latina) woman told him that latinos don't socialise with white people, she strongly implied that he had put everyone in a slightly awkward position but they were making allowances because he was foreign and didn't know.

I very much doubt that, in New York @BlackAmericanoNoSugar
The Latino colleague was maybe looking to undermine your husband, or has her own racial bigotry to deal with.

Wow! She is quite something. I have two girls and if we had had a party invite saying you could go as a pirate or a ballerina they would have both gone as pirates. In fact my oldest had a pirate party when she was younger.

I would respond with 😅😂🤣😅😂🤣he was a dressed as a ballet dancer 😂🤣😅 sorry wasn't it obvious x

His english accent probably made him star of the day in that it made him stand out and be interesting - not his outfit.

Latina, not Latino - excuse me.

this is southern honor culture where men have to be men and if someone crosses you their whole family must be slaughtered to avenge the slight
I think tread very carefully!!!

Ballerina would imply the female I guess. I think she probably got upset as she thought you were making a point. Mine would've gone as a pirate ballerina. When her school had kids dressing up as princes and princesses for the royal wedding, she went as a zombie princess.

I would have replied ‘the only person being rude is you when you called me fucking insane. I’ll put this down to you having had too much to drink today and not mention it again.’

She is utterly bonkers...and potentially dangerous as one of those ultra competitive mums.....

“Do not contact me again you utterly ridiculous lunatic.”

That should do it.

When I read this I too thought 'too much wine' and also what an outdated and unbalanced viewpoint. I would ignore too, she clearly has problems and i wouldn't get mixed up in them. My son too loved ballet for a while when he was younger and got higher grades in his exams than his two sisters did. Even though it was the 1980's I occasionally got some people with 'eye brows raised' but I thought they were really narrow minded.

She's unreasonable to even stipulate fancy dress costumes. Dressing up is so stressful. Just let the kids wear their own clothes.

But I fail to see what the issue is with a male ballet dancer.

If I received a message like that I would ignore it. It doesn't deserve a response.

@RubaiyatOfAnyone Also off topic, but as a teenager attending an all girl's school I went on an English class trip to see a performance of Romeo and Juliet. The cast were wearing period costume, and Romeo, as befitted his position as male lead, had an unfeasably large codpiece.

We were all giggling and making the most of what we thought was going to be a really boring evening, right up until the moment Romeo laid on his back and his coat fell open...

There were a lot of adolescent female converts to the classics that day.

Do not reply she’s obviously not sane and has some
Other issue with you.

This
*
I would ask her what bit of the ballet dancers and pirate theme you didn’t adhere to.*

I’m horrified at this. But I actually don’t think you should reply. You’ll never get a sane rational response and just get more upset. Never speak to this person again.

RTFT PEOPLE!!!

I'd send her a link to Steven McRae's Instagram and ask her if she's been sniffing Aurolac. Stupid cow. I'd also recommend Steven McRae's Instagram to anyone who admires ballet and the sheer hard fucking work those men and women put in.

That's really horrible. It's a child's birthday party. Why is she being so unkind and ridiculous. Nothing as strange as folk. Id be gobsmacked and probably tell her to feck off!