Friend selling gifts I got her

[nobunfight]

Just been on Facebook and seen my best friend is selling some shoes she borrowed from me a couple months ago. She asked me if she could borrow them, I said yes of course. I hadn't asked for them back because I hadn't needed them, but I do want them back at some point! Anyway they are on Facebook for sale, I thought ok, she maybe forgot they were mine, but then I noticed there are 2 other things she's put on, gifts I bought her. One is a gift from a holiday, that I put a lot of thought into, and another a Christmas present that again, I spent a lot on and put a lot of thought into and she said she loved them.

How do I approach this? Am I being unreasonable to be pissed off?

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Wow, cf!

Hope you get a reply soon and get them back hassle free. As for the gifts, either dont buy her anything or get her a gift card and if she says anything you can always just say that you got the feeling that you didnt buy her the right stuff before, so youre not sure what her tastes are

She's probably Kondo-ing.

Offer to go and collect what is yours . Gifts are not yours any more. Do not give I’m future, you clearly do not know her preferences

Definitely get your shoes back! and never lend this CF anything again.

If she doesn't respond, an 'um, they're my shoes' comment on the post should get the conversation going.

It's pretty awful that she is doing this, especially with your shoes, and she must know that you use Facebook,and will have seen the ads.

I suppose she is at liberty to sell the gifts from you, a bit bad though, but not your shoes. If they are not sold as yet,you should ask for them to be returned to you,and it's not petty to do this, they are your shoes . She surely can't forget that the shoes are yours when she puts them up for sale.

She might be really struggling

OP, is she really a friend?

Just because you are struggling doesn't mean you sell other peoples things though does it ?? Do people have no morals ?

If she hasn't bothered to respond yet, i'd post on the picture: I lent you these to wear to an event, not sell on! Please return my shoes!

"Look, you can do what you like with those gifts I bought you (and I won't trouble you with any in the future), but the shoes were a loan, and I need those back pronto, thanks".

Don't comment on the gifts, they were a gift, now hers to do with as she pleases. Some folks are so weird, it's like if they give a gift then it's still theirs for ever more to have some form of say over. And don't stop gifting if she gifts you. Because that's also just rude.

As for the shoes, you've done right to ask for them back. She likely jist forgot they were yours.

I thought about selling a small gift family had got me and my DP before, and didn’t specifically because I thought they might see it on Facebook and it would hurt their feelings/ seem ungrateful. We were grateful and appreciated the thought but just knew we would never use it. I also sold on a gift from my Dad previously. Felt bad to do it but did let him know and apologised as it just wasn’t my sort of thing. Again, I was extremely appreciative of the gesture though! Is she extremely harebrained? Bit thoughtless of her really. And ask for the shoes back immediately!

And if I’d put loads of thought into a gift for a friend then saw on Facebook she was selling it, I’d feel a bit sad too! Don’t think it’s worth mentioning though, you’ll just look silly and she might not have meant anything by it.

Say you need the shoes back to wear this weekend.

Don't spend much on her in future. Token gift of something to eat or drink is enough.

Has she replied about the shoes yet?

Did she ask to borrow them in person or in writing? Because she might try to say you gave them to her and she doesnt need to give them back.

Leave a comment saying hey xxxxx those shoes are mine you borrowed please can I have them back

The gifts are just that, gifts, so she can do what she wants with them. But I now wouldn’t be spending a lot on any more

she replied saying that she thought I gave them to her (why she thought that I don’t know because I definitely said she could borrow them for a night out and that I’d need them back at some point) and will let me have them back so thankfully she didn’t sell them yet - they are quite pricey heels otherwise I wouldn’t be so bothered. I’ve taken all of your comments on board and will not be buying her gifts in future and I am going to be more assertive and now that I’ve read through your comments I am right to be pissed off about it - they are my shoes that I spent a good amount of money on! Also selling things that I have given to her on Facebook is one thing but it’s the fact that I saw it and just felt hurt. She didn’t even try to hide it! I didn’t even get a sorry when she replied several hours later

I've a friend like this. She is actually a good friend and always buys gifts in return but I did feel pissed off when she tried to sell something I'd bought her. They are hers to do with as she wishes though.
I no longer buy her gifts. I take her to lunch.

She’s a CF. Even if you had given them to her, it she didn’t want them anymore, she should have offered them back to you, not sold them on for profit!

I'm glad you messaged her about the shoes, that is cheeky AF, especially if they are expensive ones it's obvious you are going to want them back. The presents I would be a bit hurt by, but I wouldn't mention it as she has every right to sell them. A poster mentioned she might be struggling, but that doesn't mean she should be selling other peoples stuff.