Boys in ballet - really fucking annoyed

[Boyscandoballettoo]

Please excuse the ranty tone of this thread - I have just had enough! Took my male toddler to a ballet class, and the number of negative comments or comments laughing about it from so-called family and friends has been overwhelming.

Please can people tell me AIBU to think it’s a bloody unisex sport?!? There have always been male ballet dancers! I do NOT understand the ignorance over it and even if it were a female sport traditionally, how dare people be so bloody sexist and make fun of a boy for joining in.

I don’t know why but it’s really pushing my buttons!

Because it is so targeted and disciplined it develops more fitness and stamina, alighnement, co-ordination and strength than for example street dance which is just a decent cardio workout?

Ballet is more of a sport than darts or snooker which are styled as such. It’s bloody tough. My nails/toes/feet have never fully recovered.

Comefromaway, pardon me repeating myself but I don't know how else to say it: I am not questioning ballet's technical or physical demands. I wondered why the PP thinks that ballet being 'restrictive' is 'probably what makes it so good' for the OP and her son. The PP contrasts it with activities where you run around outside, which makes me think that s/he has decided a) that ballet is 'restrictive' because it's done indoors and b) that the OP and her son enjoy being 'restricted' in this way. I don't understand why. That's my question.

A “sport” doesn’t necessarily require fitness or athletic ability hence the examples of pool and darts before. A sport needs you to be able to score points against set rules and parameters more than someone else, or do something faster/ longer/higher than someone else. For some sports this requires great athleticism.

Honestly you need to go to dance competitions they are scored against set rules and parameters. Don't you think it is odd that dancing on ice is a sport (well the Olympics think it is) but dancing without ice isn't? Dancing was being considered as a new Olympic sport but lost out to something else, can't remember what got the place.

Trewser DD 12 wears joggers and hoodies from the boys' section because she doesn't like flowers or lace, is interested in Pokemon and FNAF and has mostly male friends. My aunt said of that last point: "We need to keep an eye on that. " Bollocks. She can be friends with whoever she wants. Not many girls share her interests, and she doesn't share theirs.

I'm assuming the pp thinks the restrictive nature of ballet is what makes it so targeted and so good for you as compared with just running around. Having a daughter who does ballet, tap, modern, jazz, latin, contemporary and streetdance I tend to agree that it is the ballet which has had the most effect on her general fitness levels (despite it not being her favourite genre.

Dance used to be a choice of sport on GCSE PE is it not anymore?
I know when both my ds did it they chose hockey, most of the girls chose dance, several of them Ballet.

I did PE A-level. I did dance as my individual sport.

You can’t argue with stupid. What you can say is that having a laugh at an 18 month old is neither clever nor funny.

I wish there were some boys in my daughter’s ballet class. She also wants to play football so we’ll give it a try in the spring. Any adult saying football is not for girls can fuck off as far as I’m concerned. Then again I used to ride a motorbike , go snowboarding on my own a lot and always had short hair so I’m used to people’s stupidity.

When young men were conscripted in WW2, male dancers were laughed as being sissies. On the parade ground when the squaddies were ordered to jump up and down on the spot – ‘till further notice, the “sissies” were still going strong long after all the other “men” collapsed, exhausted - thus demonstrating that they had boundless strength, endurance and determination. Not called “sissies” after that!

@CosmoK Ok I take your points. I will definitely ask my niece about it as well as she is also in competitive Irish dancing. I have never heard her or her parents refer to as a sport but it's never really come up in conversation either.

I suppose Motor Sport is also a referred to as a sport but is also something other than that

For GCSe you are assessed in physical activity AND sport. Dance can only be used for one activity. Rock climbing can also be assessed as an activity.

There is also of course a separate GCSE in Dance.

This is hilarious. Most people wouldn’t get through the warm up and barre of an average ballet class! It. Is. Exhausting

This. The barre work alone would finish most people...

Yeah I'm bringing my DS to ballet. Luckily my sister is a dancer and my brother and dad love dancing so it's normal in our family. My husband loves to dance and his family kind of expected that we'd want our son to go to classes too. If DS ever stops enjoying it, he can stop.

I haven't mentioned it to too many people outside the family, mostly because I'm aware that there might be some negativity and I don't want to hear it.

As to whether dancing is a sport or an art form - surely it's both! They're both equally legitimate disciplines to practice.

I meant restrictive as in precise! Like pilates. There are very set ways of doing things. That's probably very good for you physically, I'm afraid we are philistines and just like running around with a ball.

@Justkeeprollingalong - no need to apologise, what I said was a bit stupid really, especially without the context.

I’m generally a bit weird but some of the posts on here are confusing the hell out of me. There seems to be a genuine value judgement being made against dance by some people because it’s not “competitive” in the tradition sense. At the risk of being goady can I just ask “so what”? I’ve met too many dedicated amateur sportspeople (usually men) who are crashing bores and really quite inadequate as human beings. They are certainly driven to succeed in their chosen sport but at what cost? How many threads are there on MN by women who never see their partner because they are off on yet another sportive or —trophy hunt— tournament? Obviously dance requires just as much dedication to do well but at the end of it at least the dancer is creating something of beauty rather than just collecting cheap trophies and bragging rights.

This is controversial but my daughter looks down on competitive dance as opposed for dancing purely as an art form!

There is a big difference in style for competitive dancing vs "normal " dancing.
My DD teaches both.

Ballet is far too restrictive for us, which is probably what makes it so good for you!

What the fuck?!

DS doesn’t JUST do ballet - he does loads of other things. We have a dog so he’s running in the park every day. He swims and as I’ve said repeatedly he will horse ride, ski,play tennis etc.

Wtf is with that comment? What do you even mean? Why would it be perfect for me if restrictive? I’m perfectly able bodied and in my 20s. Odd

@CosmoK Ok I take your points. I will definitely ask my niece about it as well as she is also in competitive Irish dancing. I have never heard her or her parents refer to as a sport but it's never really come up in conversation either.

I don't think people call it a sport unprompted but if asked they would definitely say it's a sport. If she's currently training for the worlds I wish her luck...it's going be a great year as it's the 50th anniversary. Sometimes i wish I was still competing rather than teaching!

@Rumboogie

That’s fascinating - I didn’t know that!

*Ballet is far too restrictive for us, which is probably what makes it so good for you!

What the fuck?!

DS doesn’t JUST do ballet - he does loads of other things. We have a dog so he’s running in the park every day. He swims and as I’ve said repeatedly he will horse ride, ski,play tennis etc.

Wtf is with that comment? What do you even mean? Why would it be perfect for me if restrictive? I’m perfectly able bodied and in my 20s. Odd*

Erm I think the pp meant 'you' as in the collective you. It's good for your health because it's restrictive, disciplined etc.

Just reply "Who do you think ballerinas dance with?" And make this face .

@Trewser

Ah ok - apologies, I misread the intention of your comment - as @DarlingNikita did too! It sounded like you were saying good for ME personally as if I for some reason was only able to take part in restrictive sports!